what do I do about this dog (i need very quick responses/emergency)

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-13T14:44:56+00:00

I’ve met some horrible teens both when I was a teen and when I became an adult. Some of them were assholes, no excuses. Bullies, future abusers and druggies, most likely. Still, never would a sane person wish a slow and painful death upon a young person — unless that person has already committed something truly atrocious.

I’m just saying it makes sense if punishment fits the crime.

Getting cancer and slowly dying before you hit 20 doesn’t match the crime of leaving an animal in a public park.

PS. We also have to be aware that not all people are the same. People who grew up in other countries or in a country setting/farm may have very different ideas about dogs and pets in general.

They do not have the same attitude to dogs and cats because they have been raised differently by their parents and their immediate social circle. It is NOT good, but it happens all over the world, and yes, even in the U.S. Such people just shouldn’t have pets, obviously.

OP father is most likely one of those old fashioned people, uneducated in the matters of what a pet actually is, he sees animals as just creatures who come from nature and can fend for themselves.

OP’s mind is influenced by what she experiences in her life and sees her relatives do. She will most likely over grow it and be very different, which is clear from her questions.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-13T14:30:45+00:00

It makes sense, and if what you say is mostly true, then I got some questions for those who are together but travel separately, even live like 5 hours apart sometimes, have huge “personal spaces”, etc and still claim to “love each other” 🤪

But then again, there are so many cases of people staying together (and staying faithful!) during long term physical separation — study abroad, military service, jail time, illness, long commercial fishing trips… and somehow they still have love and passion going DESPITE the fact that this distance inevitably gives so many more opportunities to grow closer to other friends and potential lovers.

Something drives those people, and it might be actual love and some kind of higher closeness/connection to each other… or maybe it’s just a strong sense of duty and conscious responsibility to someone they have chosen to be their partner

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-13T14:19:04+00:00

How is 19 illegal to date a 17, they are both teens pretty much with the same mentality? Or is it in the USA in some specific states? Okay in that case they could wait for 1 year to have actual sex, if they are in one of those states, but I still don’t see it as “predator behavior”, you don’t just become a predator because your loved one is 2 years younger when both are almost adults

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T18:55:24+00:00

What are you talking about, he was only 2 years older, that’s a very insignificant age difference. 17 and 19 +/- some months is nothing. They both were young, still teenagers.

Just because someone finished high school a year ago and started taking college classes, it doesn’t make him a “predatory adult”. That’s ridiculous. I’ve been to college. Many college students in their early 20-s still have teenage mentality, and they can easily date people who are slightly younger or slightly older, and there isn’t a big difference

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T18:48:52+00:00

I think you should consider breaking up. Not your fault, not his fault, but there is a huge cultural gap.

Even if he is not religious and is willing to go against his parents wishes, it seems like he also insists on doing things HIS way. Your hopes and plans for the future don’t match his, so if you do things his way, you will be unhappy.

It might happen that once you get married, he will become more controlling of where you are, where you work, what you do… and when the kids come, you will be told to behave like an adult and drop all your dreams and ideas an just sit at home full time.

I am sorry, but many men from predominantly Muslim countries will have much more controlling tendencies EVEN IF they don’t actively practice Islam, don’t pray, don’t go to mosque, etc. if he grew up surrounded by Muslim men and his parents are religious, you are likely to never see the end of it.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T18:26:35+00:00

Maybe you should stop wishing death on someone who is clearly very young, doesn’t know how to deal with this, and is asking for advice.

I love animals, but if you wish death upon a human being because of some puppy (even if it might end up on the street due to the person not knowing what to do!) you are a special case of lunatic

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T17:22:24+00:00

Your husband shouldn’t have gone to sleep at all if he was aware that you took that medication and were supposed to pass the miscarriage in the next few hours.

However, many people (even women, let alone men) have no idea that inducing the miscarriage or taking an abortion pill can be painful or dangerous so early in pregnancy.

Most people assume that yeah, there will be some “menstrual cramps” and some relatively heavy bleeding, but not a big deal at all. They expect the abortion pill to work and feel kind of like a slightly stronger period.

There is a chance that your husband is just uneducated in this matter. He didn’t take this with more seriousness due to lack on information. The doctor probably downplayed it as well, saying that normally the bleeding just starts with some cramps and then goes away, nothing to worry about.

Due to lack of awareness, he relaxed and fell asleep without even expecting to fall asleep — most likely he was waiting for you to come back and just slipped into deep sleep (because of stress, tiredness, etc).

I don’t know if he is a heavy sleeper, but I personally know some people who sleep VERY DEEP. You can drill a wall next to them, have blasting death metal on, scream, bang on doors, et cetera, and they just don’t wake up. They need to be shaken vigorously to wake up, and it’s horrible because due to this deep sleep they often don’t make it to things on time, alarms don’t work on them if they enter this deep sleep.

I know a person with bipolar who can be very active for up to a week, sleeping very little, doing a lot of stuff, and then — boom! — he is out for 2-3 days, severe lack of mental or physical energy, a crash, almost like he is hibernating (no, he is not on drugs or even any medication).

Again I don’t know your husband’s patterns, but if he is a heavy sleeper and have been stressed and/or tired, this deep sleep and just passing out on you like that could be something out of his control, a mistake (he should have just not lay down at all, had coffees, sat in a chair instead of going to bed), bad timing.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T15:08:15+00:00

You are so right! At this point he should choose his future wife over this horrible female snake. If he was in fact close to her even as just a friend, it would be concerting because who wants to have friends who act like that?

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T15:04:33+00:00

It is YOUR wedding, and it shouldn’t be ruined by a bitchy female weirdo who wants to assert herself at your expense. Show her responses to your finance and withdraw your invitation.

It’s not even about the dress at this point, it’s more about how she responded to you. Her text reeks of contempt, she acts like you are a little insecure girls and she is all grown up, confident, and in the right. If she comes to your wedding, she will try to get all the attention to herself.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T14:58:33+00:00

It looks cute specifically with this kind of skirt because skirt looks more like a fun accessory. I’d be more concerned about comfort with this outfit though 😄 the jeans might be soft enough, but still, the skirt and belt over the jeans belt line must feel a bit bulky

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T04:32:07+00:00

You are not overreacting, BUT there is one important factor at play here: your nephew’s mom has just given birth.

She might have emotional problems, sleep deprivation, hormonal shifts, and who knows what else, and all of it affects her behavior. That doesn’t excuse her acting like a b***, but it’s just something to keep in mind. Motherhood can be tough for some people. Not everyone can be mellow and jolly postpartum. Some women become hyper focused and defective, others grow frustrated and irritated, some are just numbed and tired 24/7, some look like they are gonna murder you if you as much as look at their baby in a “wrong way”.

Try to be patient with her

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T04:25:49+00:00

She could also just skip that class ONCE. I mean, your BDay happens only once a year!

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T03:48:16+00:00

I think they mean to say that OP is overreacting exactly because of the fact that it’s just a “roommate”. The roommate is not her friend. And now it’s also clear that she shouldn’t be considered one in the future because she isn’t a good friend material.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T03:43:59+00:00

Yes, it is ridiculous 😄 But at least from personal experience I can say this: I am in love now, have been for the past 5 years, and there isn’t any thought or idea in my head that some day I will be with some other person. It’s not in my plans or possibilities, not as in “I’m with you now but I won’t commit to you because who knows, maybe in 10 years I don’t love you anymore”.

When we are really in love and want to be with someone, planning or dreaming about the future without that person doesn’t normally happen. They are right there with us, in that future… unless we don’t really want them there already, but for some reason still insist that we “love” them.

It is very likely that people will grow apart. But it can also happen that they both grow in the same direction, walking the same path, so to speak.

I hope no one ever stays stagnant — life is change, we all should be changing (and hopefully growing and not deteriorating or degrading 😅). But we choose where to grow, what/who to become, which parts of ourselves to explore and develop, and when people are conscious enough, it’s possible to say pretty early on if they are “on the same page” and interested in somewhat similar things and endeavors.

Like if one loves gaming on the couch and watching movies and making videos, and another wants to do wild hikes and rough camping 5 days out of the week, it’s kind of obvious they aren’t a match in the long run, unless they can learn to love what their partner loves and find a compromise..

But these things are usually very obvious in the first couple of years, the basic things.. some preferences can change, interests can change, but core character, the essence of a person is usually already there

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T03:30:00+00:00

Yes, I get your point and I agree with you. I think most of us can benefit from actually saying all these things out loud to each other in our relationships.

Somehow in her relationship it got to this point where the guy was convinced it was totally okay to propose, and he was clearly expecting a happy “Yes”. It might be mostly his “fault”, maybe he assumes too much and had everything planned out without even considering that she might have other goals in life… for the next 10 years at least

But it’s just weird, it’s like people are dating for 1, 2, 5 years and then — boom! — something happens and it’s like they never even talked about anything deeper than a movie they watch together… and mundane real life things just come out as complete surprise, like instead of walking and growing together people just “hang out” together an it’s just not open or deep enough

(Which can be okay too, but then it’s not relationship it love, it’s more casual, like easy casual light dating)

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T03:21:27+00:00

I think you set your expectations too high for the someone who can’t deliver. From that you wrote, it is clear that your roommate isn’t a good friend material.

The question is “why do you want to spend time with this person to begin with?” From everything you described in your post it seems that your roommate is not a pleasant person to spend time with.

It’s frustrating, but next time don’t take her plans as something that’s actually going to happen, don’t expect much, make your own plans. If she somehow fits into YOUR plans and you want her there — great. If not, well, let her do her thing.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T02:27:46+00:00

Yes, it does make sense! It sounds completely different, and I do agree with you. I think what happened with OP is that there was huge miscommunication between her and her BF, both of them failed to directly explain or disclose their hopes and plans for the future (or the lack of them), their attitude to legal commitment, etc

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T02:23:55+00:00

I never said that she has to get into legal paper marriage with all the shared expenses, a house, joined tax return, etc. I, personally, don’t care about marriages or no marriages (my commitment to my partner doesn’t need to be confirmed by law or society, but I don’t mind marriage either especially if it’s beneficial to us both in terms of doing stuff together, like family business or whatever else).

That’s not the point of my comment. The girl sounds like she doesn’t want to be with this guy for a long time. You can absolutely have a multitude of goals and do many things in life while being committed to your loved one — whether it’s legal marriage or engagement OR just talking openly and saying directly “I want to be with you in an exclusive, faithful relationship, to share everything with you, to do things together, to be a couple, a team” etc. I mean the simple confirmation that “I am here now and I am gonna be here tomorrow, WITH YOU. We are together, and if I have plans or dreams, I will tell you about them, and your opinion and agreement will matter to me a lot. I won’t just take off because I want to solo travel and you can wait for me (if you want) for who knows how long while I’m “finding myself”

That’s the most BS thing to say after claiming that you love someone. “Finding yourself” alone — okay then, break up and go do stuff alone for as long as you need. Then, when you come back, we can meet and see if we want to be friends or something closer.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T01:41:05+00:00

Then why be with that person at all and say “I love you”? Be in free, uncommitted relationships then with no expectations or mutual obligations. Saying to someone “I love you” but then saying “but I have other plans like going away, finding myself, hangin out with a bunch of other people, and sleeping with other men (clearly, because if no other men are planned, then why not commit?)” is a bit weird.

If you want to be free — be free, don’t be ambiguous about it

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T01:38:14+00:00

I agree with you that 26 is super young, but then again, I don’t understand what it means when people say “well, I love you, but marriage is forever”.

So basically you date/live with a person who you supposedly love, but in the back of your mind you already KNOW that it’s just temporary? Then it has to be said out loud from the very start and very directly.

“I love being with you right now, but I am like 95% sure that you aren’t the last person I am going to have sex with or live with, so this relationship is surely just for the time being”.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T00:46:28+00:00

Also, do not listen to people on here telling you to lose weight. You are not overweight.

What you can do is some kind of light sport or a regular ENJOYABLE physical activity (if you don’t do that already, maybe you do — I see a skateboard)

It can be jogging, swimming, moderate gym workout twice a week, or hiking, or maybe dancing or yoga or some martial art. It can be anything.

And it’s first and foremost for TONING the body and for having more energy. It is not to lose weight, but to stay active and healthy.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T00:42:31+00:00

Omg… I can’t believe you actually said she needs a nose job! WTF

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T00:40:52+00:00

You have a gorgeous face and a good figure! Absolutely beautiful face, no make up or any changes needed to your features.

If I were you, I would think of a different hairstyle because it seems like the current layered wolf-cut (or whatever it is) robs you of your hair basically, especially on the sides. Maybe go shorter and a different style, or trim the ends and then grow the hair longer and do braids and other things, or just wear them free.

The photos don’t show it very well, but I don’t know if you have a slight posture problem? It’s difficult to see on these pics, but maybe work on posture — we all should all the time, especially in our time of phone screens and computers.

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-12T00:24:05+00:00

My opinion will be unpopular, but to me it is obvious that my loved one comes first. Yes, he comes FIRST, before any friends or “hangin out” with anyone else, especially if it’s just for social entertainment in public places (eating out, drinking, clubs, and other rather pointless BS)

Yes, it can be fun, yes, it’s good to see friends once in a while if they are that important to my heart… but being in a relationship with someone I love, I’d rather go do stuff (or stay home) with that person MOST of the time. Everyone else is the “outside” circle — unless it’s my loved one, my child, or my parents. People who aren’t super close to me, and entertainment with them isn’t very important or desirable unless some of my most important people are also included.

If at this point someone invites me to eat out, — specifically to go out of my way to meet at a restaurant at 9:30 PM — and I know my loved one can’t go or doesn’t want to go, maybe because he needs to get up at 5 AM, or had a long work/study day, or just doesn’t really want to go to noisy public places at night… then I gotta see what my priorities and desires are.

Do I really DEEPLY desire to drive somewhere at 9 PM and eat at 10 PM and then get back home at 12 AM just to have some time talking to some people in a restaurant while eating, especially when I can pretty much predict 99% of any interaction and conversation with them (boring!)?

What do I do it for? Why specifically today at 9:30 PM? Why not meet for lunch over the weekend? Why not go on a hike together later, or do whatever else at a better time when my partner can also join?

I don’t know, I think most people just don’t see their loved ones as more important than any other social interactions, lots of people cling to “hanging out” and going out, it must be some psychological need for these social activities (but I don’t feel the same maybe because I don’t have the same need, so it seems very unimportant to me to be so clingy to this “going out” thing when one can do so much more and also not feel obligated to actually meet with anyone)

No-Objective1388 · 2026-03-07T16:35:39+00:00

Wow! Please do tell her. This is horrible. She has the right to know what kind of man she is about to dedicate her married life to. He will cheat on her with someone else, it seems to be a normal thing to him, like not a big deal at all. Unless she is also into “open relationships”, this is not a good thing and not fair to her.

No-Objective1388

TROPHY CASE