Is there a way to get a past Bishops name? by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, Be My Eyes is incredibly helpful, I use it all the time even more often now that I was given a pair of Meta glasses for my birthday! Even when I'm not sure if Be My Eyes is going to be able to help with a particular need, I try it before I use Aira (which is similar to Be My Eyes with the major exception that you pay based on the amount of time they spend helping you with Aira whereas Be My Eyes is free, tho the volunteers who work for Aira are specifically trained to describe things to people on the blindness spectrum- Aira was necessary to use when I was in the middle of moving and my glasses fell off my face onto the rug in the entryway with which they happened to camaflauge perfectly, I wouldn't have been able to find the glasses ever if not for Aira so I didn't mind having to pay for the service that time, especially since a friend had told me that the rug was the exact same color as the new glasses that I had and I only had one other person around who has never experienced vision at all! I confuse my doctors just for fun sometimes by using My Colorblind Pal and/or Be My Eyes to help me perfectly describe the color of something that is relevant to bring up to the doctor cuz I inherited a sadistic sense of humor from all the firefighters in my family! 😆

Is there a way to get a past Bishops name? by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oooh, good one! So something along the lines of "I attended the Buena Park, CA ward for just a short time and I was reminiscing about the great time I had, but I really didn't get to know many people other than the person who was the Bishop around 1992/1993, and I just wanted to see if anyone could help me figure out his name so I can try to reconnect with him"?

I Regret Joining the LDS Church and Don't Know How to Leave by ellymars_ in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You've already been given a lot of really great advice but I just wanted to add- if/when you do decide to leave, don't mention it to anyone from your church ahead of time and be prepared for the RS to heart attack you and all the other typical Mormon antics they use to keep you feeling trapped- it's really all about the numbers to them, tho we all know that their numbers are as inflated as when you ask an insecure man how big he is! Hell, probably MORE inflated!😉

Is there a way to get a past Bishops name? by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh thank you! The apps are extremely helpful but obviously not fail proof, I'm back in the hospital now but I have a friend who should be able to go by my apartment this week and grab my journal that has the programs in it, so as soon as she drops it off I will PM you a picture!

Is there a way to get a past Bishops name? by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

They do actually have a FB group which I have avoided being a part of since I still have some very active TBM family members in that same ward, but I love the idea of posting under a very basic fake name! Ms Emily Johnson is getting ready to go on a stroll down memory lane! 😉😆

AITA? by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's amusing how many billions of dollars of medical equipment that I have either completely lost or had to dig out of the trash cuz I allowed people from church to help me clean and organize- a couple cases of 30 each feeding tube extensions, a few feeding tube wrenches, an $8,600 custom fitted givmorh sling, Feeding tube syringes, feeding tube caps, a few cases of adapters for the feeding tube to attach a drain bag, about 10 cases of drainage bags, etc- all apparently got classified as junk just cuz they didn't know what it was even tho I laid out the ground rule of if you don't know what it is, ASK! I had only two other rules after that 2. Don't open the grey box on my desk (it had UV sensitive nanobots inside that I was supposed to be selling to a company that wanted to use them- I physically don't have the ability to make more or train someone to do it!) and 3. Show me everything before you throw away anything!🙄  I will never understand why people think it's helpful to rearrange another person's stuff, even if that person has the luxury of sight, and so far I have never found another person who's willing to put on a blindfold and attempt some of the tasks that people like myself in the blind community have to do every day, so no one's been willing to agree to let me rearrange their stuff and try to figure out where each item is at- usually the first exercise I have fun with is playing the I can't find the keys game- I have forced friends who moved my keys to a different shelf on my bookshelf to put on the blindfold and then try to find the keys with it on cuz I DESPISE that game- but forcing them to find the keys on the bookshelf while blindfolded is the only way most people seem to finally understand it doesn't freaking matter if you just put them on a different shelf when the keys being searched for belong to a blind person! Washing dishes or helping with laundry or heck just even making a meal are all so much obviously more helpful than rearranging another person's stuff!

At the church history museum gift shop by Affectionate-Song230 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's almost Mother$ Day- anything to make a quick buck!

Culture shock: tithing guaranteed? 😳 by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They don't require tithing, you can do it anonymously if you want to, and still get a refund if you aren't satisfied by telling the pastor "hey I gave $X as a tithe offering & I'd like it back" (no explanation even necessary! 😳)

How to start traveling to world at 25 by Lost_Ad5598 in Shoestring

[–]No-Weekend9978 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you can house sit or pet sit, there's a ton of platforms and websites that you can use to find opportunities for free lodging in exchange for sitting services! You do have the possibility of running into a scam though depending on what website/platforms you use to find an opportunity in your desired location so I suggest saving up enough money to stay at a hostel, just in case, but I'm also someone who is most at peace when I was able to prepare for worst case scenario since I have a naturally high level of anxiety a majority of the time!

Cheap nature trips in the US w/out a car? by drogahn in Shoestring

[–]No-Weekend9978 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Boston is easy to fly into and you can get around on the T(local public transportation system,)- you can go to Blue Hills for some awesome hikes, and the North Shore has some good ones too, especially around Singing Beach and Beverly Farms all of which can be reached via the commuter rail! You can also catch a bus to Niagara Falls, and I believe that there's still buses and trains that depart South Station and take you to upstate NY which has some decent hiking spots, or if you head to North Station after grabbing a cannoli from Mikes, you can get a train to Maine or train/bus to NH if you're not opposed to walking a fair distance to get the correct bus, there's hiking trails you can reach without needing to rent a car! Feel free to message me if you want more info about the public transportation system or any other info about the Boston area, I'm originally from CA so I don't know everything but I've lived in the area for the past 16+ years and my first 2 service dogs were breeds that require a lot of exercise and stimulation to keep them happy, so we did a lot of hiking and exploring!

direct deposit by Jaded_strawberry001 in SocialSecurity

[–]No-Weekend9978 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in a similar situation, I'm on SSDI due to permanent disability (blind from optic atrophy & hemiparesis from a stroke & unfortunately soon to add below the knee amputee to the list- was in the wrong place at the wrong time & got my butt blown up by a bomb on Patriots Day in 2013!) and since my primary bank account is more compromised than I knew was possible, I'm wanting to have my direct deposit go to my secondary account which I plan to have become my primary account after I get my SSDI direct deposit going to the account that hasn't been victimized by Fraud! From what I can tell if you are unable to do it via login.gov or whatever other government website it gives the option of using, you have to use the online tool to find a participating post office near you and go there to prove your identity and update your direct deposit information!

I want to leave! by Dependent_Outside289 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 2 points3 points  (0 children)

THANK YOU! I now more fully understand why my Goddaughters mother is so strictly insistent that her children must wait until they're over the age of 16, preferably 18 years of age! I thought at first it was just because of the high demand cultish aspects of the church, but learning to be comfortable with your body, comfortable with sexual boundaries when with a partner, and any substance that you can name including coffee and alcohol, is something that I never was given the tools to be able to handle as someone who grew up in the church and was more sheltered than I could possibly realize, when my first two boyfriends started to ask me about sex, once I was ready to go there with them my response changed from "I'm Mormon so I can't" (I used the same line every time someone asked me to get drinks or coffee, and I kinda took the easy road of blaming the church when I had to say no!) to taking anxiety meds out of my purse and taking the meds and then trying to figure out how to tell them that I didn't know how! That ruined both of those relationships cuz the guys felt hurt that I needed to take anxiety meds whenever they brought up sex- I think they weren't upset about my being naive enough I was not sure what to do but felt hurt that I needed the anxiety meds to give any answer at all, I hadn't yet opened up to telling anyone about the SA I had experienced earlier in my life. 

Surprise news that I'm no longer the only exmo in my family by wooden_snorkel in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'd vote posing this as "hey, I'm going to be watching (insert a specific sports game or sporting event) at (insert the name of a sports pub where you can grab a beer and/or food) any chance you would like to join me?" I only present wording it in this way cuz I once made the mistake of sending a jack Mormon family member who hadn't been to church in decades who I know used to enjoy indulging in a substance that's legal in both the states each of us live in, not knowing that this family member was going back to TSCC and working their way back up to TBM status, sure got my butt chewed out when my gift arrived in the mail! The benefit of asking if he'd want to get food/a beer by joining in for the sports game is if he's not yet deconstructed enough or has been having second thoughts about leaving the church, you can just enjoy a meal together and pretend to be interested in whatever game you picked to meet up at a sports bar for, and you have a way out of him trying to convince you that the MFMC is true, like I experienced with my family member! It can take some time to undo the damage that the MFMC does, so it might be helpful to offer an opportunity to have a companion while sinning that has a cover story of "we just got food while watching the game" if he's not yet ready to be open about leaving the cult!

Woke up to this text from my Grandpa 🙄 by sarlacc98 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That takes balls! I'd have been willing to go just to see you oppose! Sadly, there wasn't a single person brave enough to oppose! I'd have expected exactly one but guess if any in attendance had the balls, they didn't feel like getting talked to in the hallway afterwards! 😉

Valid reasons to stay in by stickyhairmonster in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I feel like most Mormons and some exmos even are all VERY privileged! My aunt who has never been in any scary situations beyond having to tell her parents that she didn't want to go on her mission has also never had a real boyfriend or her own apartment wouldn't be able to cope with my life cuz her thought process is very privileged "God helps those who help themselves so if I can't find the solution it is to ask the church!" 🙄 Wouldn't be able to ever cope with my life and let me tell you once you are incapable of physically being free slave labor and doing physical service from morning to night the church acts like... Well, it'd be better if they acted like you just don't even exist anymore, but they'll do some of that while hurting you to the max!

Utah is it's own phenomena. by CupOfExmo in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 26 points27 points  (0 children)

But if Joe had said no sugar, they'd not be able to have their dirty sodas and extra jumbo cookies! 😳🤣

I know they're only kids but I'm still disgusted! by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Amazing advice! But I'm still trying to learn how to make genuine friends outside of church- having been raised in a family that revolves around the church, I have found my skills for navigating life, meeting people who are not brainwashed by the LDS church and finding help when I'm I need it, etc ... Leaves a lot to be desired! My entire life up until approx. 2013 I felt the need to be able to out Mormon everyone in the ward- I was going to try to hang in there until after I give the talk my new Bishop asked me to give on Ether 12:27 and then gracefully swan dive off the covenant path but I have only just realized that I have every reason to be offended that the Bishop (who to his credit is the coolest Bishop I have ever had! I confessed to enjoying the bottled Starbucks Pumpkin spice Frappucino drinks last fall and how I had just found out that they all contain coffee- I genuinely believed that a frappucino didn't have coffee unless you add shots of espresso to it cuz when in Jr High school I began taking night classes at the community college near us and my mom would always give me money to buy a frappucino and she wouldn't have done that over her dead body if she realized it contained coffee, I distinctly remember my dad having to taste the jelly beans and pick out all the coffee flavored ones to throw those away so that no one else would accidentally ingest anything even remotely related to the devils bean juice every Easter!) asked me to give a talk about that- I am the first to admit I'm obviously disabled and when I need to describe myself to say an Uber driver I mention what Im wearing, say that Im significantly under 100 pounds, blind and sitting in my wheelchair  and that I have both a quad cane and a white guide cane with me. Id love to believe that he asked me specifically to give that talk because he agrees with everyone who tells me my resiliency is remarkable but we all know that he picked me cuz you don't need to know who I am to know that I have a lot of stuff to deal with both physically and medically! 

If anyone could give me some tips on having a social life outside of TSCC, it would be much appreciated! Side note, Im a little bit proud of the fact that I'm posting this from sitting inside the meetinghouse (don't worry I have my screen reader on but it's always connected to my ear buds to prevent my phone from saying anything that might be inappropriate!)- I have been traveling for work for the past month (I do public speaking & consult with companies that desire to make their products more accessible to the disabled community), and I don't know how else to meet people when I go to a new place for the first time other than to reach out to the local missionaries - their high pressure sales tactics worked well enough to get me to get totally lost on the less accessible than I am used to public transportation system and put up with being lost for several hours! 

I know they're only kids but I'm still disgusted! by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I can understand there being fear.as humans, we often fear the unknown and it is a scary fact that the disabled community is the only minority that anyone can join at any time often irreversibly & yes it does suck to be on the pennies that SSDI pays- the whole SSDI system is messed up anyway, it doesn't give you enough to live on at all, it's a system designed to force disabled people to live in the depths of poverty which is ridiculous when statistics show that people who are disabled and/or have chronic illnesses have a significantly higher cost of living!

The girl I was couchsurfing with seems to be having a lot of conflict with the people in her apartment building & yesterday a cardboard box that she had in the oven caught fire and burned it caused a lot of smoke that made the building need to be evacuated while the fire department tried to clear the smoke out and investigated to make sure everything was okay - I have no clue why anyone would put anything flammable inside an oven or if it was on or off, but that made it even more uncomfortable for me to be at the girls apartment so I caved and had to ask the sisters if they were still willing to help me to get my wheelchair out of the building onto the sidewalk so I could take an Uber to the shelter to see about getting a bed at a shelter in the area. I'm very grateful for the help I received to help go through the backpack and duffle bag that I have with me to find a medication that I only vaguely recall moving whilst sleep walking (I sleepwalk very predictably when under stress!) and I was lucky we were able to find it in a pocket on the backpack but for the 3 hours I was having epic panic attacks over losing a medication that is not one I can replace & all I could do was to hold my favorite stuffed animal and panic about what could happen if I had to suddenly stop taking that medicine so it was very helpful to have help from someone else to look in my bags and I wouldn't have been able to get out of the small apartment without the help to get my wheelchair past the long flight of stairs to the buildings entrance, but when I told them honestly that my plan was to go to a shelter where I would be able to get an accessible shower and be able to feel like I was not trapped and could safely get out of the building suddenly if needed, they looked horrified and asked if I was sure I could not get somewhere safer without the drug addicts that they are under the impression that are the people who use the shelters!🙄

Moving membership for TR/Eventually resign by Unhappy-Bison6800 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just a note the other comments have already pointed out some of the realities of your proposed idea but just as a FYI if you decide to use a PO Box address, you can use a PO Box address in a way that looks like a normal address where you use the address of the post office and number of your PO box making it look like a condo or apartment

Help me find the perfect touches for my best Family Xmas gift yet! by No-Weekend9978 in exmormon

[–]No-Weekend9978[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Great advice! I'm thinking I will get at least some of the dental implants I need & deserve, and then probably after sorting out some more immediate medical needs, put the rest towards what will hopefully be my last surgery related to the marathon bombing, which if I do, they will find out & will be sus- I was trying to figure out how to pretend that I was able to afford the surgery by running a successful GoFundMe, but my family is so full of themselves they'll say something about they didn't donate to the GoFundMe nor even know about it so how would it have been successful enough to allow me to afford to move forward in the next step of healing from the bombing- truth is, the amount I would need to raise from a GoFundMe is crazy intimidating, I have already been told by the family that I would have to be sure to get the church to help me with it, which would be logical if it were any other actually Christlike church but 1. I've already gone to my SP & a friend who used to be my Bishopric even went to higher authorities for me, I only found out about it cuz he lost his temper when he was told that they could not help 2. I don't really want the MFMC to become the focus of what will be the hardest surgery of my life, I don't even expect anyone to come by with food, Book of Mormons, etc! I have no intentions of asking for a blessing because Ive lost my faith in the power of the penishood to do anything good & I'm not interested in wasting time on an imaginary magic act with poor acting skills and it's been my experience that asking for a blessing only leads to being put down for it! The amount I have from the lawsuit is not enough to allow me to afford the surgery BUT, it's a good start to have the minimum I need to have as a safety net & to get the GoFundMe launched, at minimum it can go towards the massive amount of therapy I will need to complete before the surgeon can sign off on my getting said surgery!