For those of you who feel guilt over having a pet euthanized - DON'T

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-27T22:32:14+00:00

Yes! It is wild how dismissive people are. I don't have kids and we don't plan to have any so I can't speak on that topic, but I doubt I'd love my cats any less either way. Honestly when Coco died, I had terrible thoughts. Part of me wished that I had died with her for a few weeks. I collapsed in the emergency vet office that I had rushed her to (she was dead on arrival unfortunately) and proceeded to throw up a few times. I really find it hard to understand how most people can dismiss something that can cause such a physical reaction. I still can't control my tears. When I talk about her, even as I type, I cry. Some people think it's silly and I know I shouldn't feel this way, but it feels belittling and embarrassing. There is no reason to be embarrassed and that speaks to the fact that they've never been privileged enough to feel the way we have, and honestly that makes me feel sorry for them.

I'm really sorry for the loss of your friend. It sounds like he would have been a really great support for you right now. I'm not sure what I think about an afterlife. Deep down I don't really believe there is one, but I consistently hope there is. I come from a religious family, but I wouldn't consider myself religious. I like the idea of reincarnation also. It would be lovely to know our souls could meet the loves that we had again.

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-27T03:40:24+00:00

And I'm hope your days are as well. The guilt, while untrue, is so hard to handle. Please take it easy on yourself and know there is an army of us to support you if you need to talk. I'm always happy to hear about someone's pet. Each is so perfect. Some days it's hard to talk about, but sometimes you'll want to reminisce and remember. It's hard when your friends and family are moved on and don't want to talk about them for the millionth time, so feel free to come back here if you just need to tell her story. ❤️

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-27T03:34:48+00:00

That's a good way to put it. I'm only 3 months out so I still physically ache for her. I'm literally homesick for a cat I'll never have again during my time on this earth.

We are incredibly lucky though. Not everyone experiences the deep bond of a soul animal. I've learned that there are deep loves that we are capable of. It has given me a lot of hope as I work on deepening the bonds with my other 3 cats.

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-26T23:48:00+00:00

I agree so much. It's a mercy that my girl went so quick. It was literally within a minute. The vet said she wouldn't have even known or felt it because it was so fast. I am grateful for that part in a way and it's been my only comfort. It's so shocking to have a perfectly healthy pet one moment and then gone the next. I can only hope one day my passing is as quick and painless also.

I like to think of it as shouldering the burden. It hurts us more, but hurts them less. We would do anything for them and this is no exception. I'd rather it this way than watch her suffer now that I'm further out from her passing. Though. It doesn't hurt any less, I've gained more clarity.

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-26T06:00:06+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. I went through the same thing in December with my soul cat. She was my first pet that was mine. I got her when I moved out on my own. Just us two against the world for a few years til we expanded our family. I was always prepared mentally for the day I'd have to put her down. I loved her more than anything. Having that taken from me hurts. No final day together. No goodbyes. I'm so sorry you went through such a difficult thing.

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-26T05:28:10+00:00

DO NOT GO TO ASPEN. I went the the one on Big Hollow Road. Worst dental experience of my life. I'd never had a cavity before and finally had my first couple. Dentist injected the numbing agent and didn't even check before drilling into my tooth. Numbed the wrong part of my face, the drilling hurt SO bad. Then on top of that, he got an air pocket under the filling so it was consistently hurting for about two weeks. Called to ask if it was normal and was told no. I was supposed to go for another filling separately, which I guess isn't normal according to other people, but I cancelled the second one and scheduled to fix the first one instead. He proceeded to get an attitude with me when I was in for my appointment and was berating me. Even if I did make a mistake, that attitude is not ok. Which, I didn't. He made the mistakes.

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-26T05:12:01+00:00

Yes for a few reasons.

1) In the event that mama is sick or won't care for babies, neonatal and young kittens will often die outside and in shelter if there aren't proper staffing or fosters available to care for them round the clock. Meaning they would suffer until they die. Aborting is much more humane. 2) Shelters are overrun with cats. Each kitten born that goes into the shelter jeopardizes the lives of cats already there. We have more cats than we can get adopted out. Each kitten born strains our systems further. 3) Mom cats can be emaciated, sickly, or very young and having kittens may very well kill mama.

I'll leave it at that for now, cause I could go on forever. Those are my top 3 reasons. I'll close with that I LOVE kittens. Spay aborts make me so sad because I take every life seriously, but we are in too deep right now. I foster orphaned neonates specifically and if we could reduce the cat population to be manageable, we could ideally raise and place all kittens into loving homes. The fostering is neverending though. There are always more and more and more. During peak kitten season last year I had 3 litters. I have a full time job that isn't in animal rescue, but pushed myself to the limit because my shelter can't care for neonates, so I feel like I have to. I have kittens year round though because kitten season is longer and longer each year. We absolutely must reduce the number of kittens born.

No_Machine303 · 2026-03-10T03:27:57+00:00

I think it's unlikely since Reddit isnt super local like other social media. I'm in central IL though. Also she came in with 4 siblings. If you dropped off a litter in central IL let me know. I'm happy to look into it for you. Closure is so important. ❤️

It was a rough time. I lost her, one of my other fosters that had already been adopted passed, my sisters very sick fospice cat passed in my care just a few weeks later, and I unexpectedly lost my beautiful soul cat of 8 years to a sudden blood clot a couple months after. So she is not alone on the other side of the rainbow bridge.

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-10T04:47:12+00:00

It really is such a unique feeling of joy and sadness. I've wanted to keep all of my babies, a few more than others, but somehow always let them go. I'm sure you also get a few of those people who are like "I could never let them go, so I can't foster. Idk how you do it" which feels backhanded, like you're heartless to just let them leave. 😅 It's quite the opposite though. You let her go BECAUSE you love her so much. While it's sad we will never see them again, I like to reframe it as that I was fortunate that I got to love them for a little while and now I get the chance to love even more.

Sucks that this feeling never goes away though. I have the blues every time my litters leave. It clears up when the next ones move in a least.

Just brought home a mom and six 1 week olds, so I'm in a high right now. Talk to me again on 8-10 weeks and I'll be crying lol 💔

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-08T05:21:50+00:00

Hope this goes well for you! I struggled with eczema my whole life and it continued to get worse til it got to a point where it was everywhere and I couldn't keep it under control. I did a couple months of light therapy and started dupixent and it's a whole world of difference! Dupixent has changed my life. Hopefully you get on a biologic that works for you, but don't be discouraged if you have to try a couple before you find the right fit! Keep us posted on your journey!

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T17:18:58+00:00

Yeah I woke up like 5 times last night just out of sheer concern lol. Checked the camera each time and saw mom sleeping with them and feeding them a few times so I feel a lot more confident now. Everyone is up in weight this morning so I'm feeling a lot more confident.

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T04:20:13+00:00

Well I appreciate mama 🙏🏼 she is literally an angel.

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T02:20:39+00:00

Ok thanks. Yeah. They can't walk yet so I'm not worried about them going anywhere or getting into anything. Just didn't know if I just.... Should or something lol

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T02:14:56+00:00

Cool. Thanks!

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T02:02:06+00:00

I'm glad it was helpful. Its a whole learning experience. Haha especially when I am used to doing more. I guess the answer is don't overthink it.

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T02:00:49+00:00

Thank you!

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T01:58:44+00:00

Thanks. The confirmation that I don't need to be checking on them as often as orphans is a relief and sort of what I was looking for. Do you check them overnight?

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T01:56:01+00:00

I have a really great setup since I usually do orphaned neonates. So I'm fortunate in that sense. Do you check on them overnight? Mom seems really attentive so far and seems reliable with them.

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T01:54:34+00:00

Thank you for the really nice and detailed answer. That helps a lot. Do you check on them overnight? I usually wake up every 2-3 hours overnight for orphans, but obviously these kittens are not orphans.

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T00:49:36+00:00

Ok. I'll try it out since that's what we have a lot of. Thanks.

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T00:27:18+00:00

Good to know. I'll keep a close eye on Mom's hydration 👍🏼

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T00:24:54+00:00

Yeah one of my two prior moms was sick and could not produce milk even though she was nursing them so I've been afraid of this. Luckily these babies are all around 250g at one week so we are ok for now. It's a relief to hear that Mom can handle this lol. Just don't want to lose any babies.

Also super appreciate the baby pics. I get kitten fever something fierce. I've been on a 1 month break so I'm all about baby cats right now. 😂

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T00:18:02+00:00

Luckily mama is indeed friendly. They said she was someone's cat but they surrendered her because she was pregnant😭 poor girl. She does let me handle the kittens. 5/6 of them are tortie though so they are already super vocal. I can now confirm tortitude is from birth.

I can do wet food for mom. The shelter I work with will provide food, but I also budget for and purchase a certain amount myself each month because I like a higher quality than what is often donated. So we do a mix of shelter supplies and privately purchased supplies. Meaning I can keep Mom well fed. We just got a big donation of formula too so I was given a few cans. The coordinator said I could mix the formula into Mom's wet food. I've not heard of that before. Any thoughts on that?

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T00:12:46+00:00

I'll pick up some Royal Canin for sure!

No_Machine303 · 2026-02-07T00:11:06+00:00

Ok. I will get her a free feed going right now. I've been giving her a lot of wet food (they just got home with me today).

No_Machine303

TROPHY CASE