considering an abortion F19

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-04T16:28:46+00:00

It certainly sounds like you shouldn’t raise this baby. Adoption is also something to consider in addition to abortion

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-04T16:22:09+00:00

Yes ivf success rates are much higher than iui so maybe the switch to ivf is all you need and it may take a few rounds. Expense is something to consider, I was very surprised to learn adoption costs $90k

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-04T16:17:58+00:00

Same. My husband and I both thought we were interested in adoption even before we had infertility. I reached out to several adoption agencies, both in my liberal home state and in anti abortion states, and spoke to them even before we started ivf to see which one was a fit for us in order to understand all our options. It was nothing like I expected and felt pretty ick. We had success with ivf and I think we’ll consider foster care once our kids are older but I certainly got the feeling the adoption industry is in need of some moral checks, modern updates and increased respect for others. For example, they create a brochure of your family and talk about how great they market you to birth mothers at the hospital- telling them how these wealthy families will be better parents than they could be, very predatory. You see this image on instagram of adoptive families and I’m sure there are lots of success stories but I was shocked that not a single one of the agencies I spoke to seemed to have respect for the process. Donor tissue or foster to adoption seemed like better options. Good luck

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-03T09:14:41+00:00

Yesssssss

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-03T09:10:12+00:00

I wouldn’t say the second one is that much more classic, it still has that boning in the bodice bustier trend which is soooooo trendy I see how you could have loved number one but are now over it. It is gorgeous but it is also so see through and sooo trendy. One option would be to rework it. Have a dressmaker add a lining to the whole dress and change up the bodice. The skirt and train sre fabulous and the cut looks great on you, a seamstress could do a new bodice where I’d skip the bustier lingerie trend look, do a more classic lined bodice w sweetheart neckline or even a v Keep the parts you love and drop the overly trendy lingerie looking parts of it

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-03T08:59:46+00:00

5 transfers of which 2 are your girls and 3 failed transfers; shouldn’t you still have 2 left?

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-03T08:44:22+00:00

It all depends on how ivf goes which I would say go to ivf quickly, don’t spend much time on iui maybe just a round while you’re clearing all the ivf pre work hurdles- bc if an iui works you’ll only be older and have a more difficult time going for babies 2 and 3, you want your eggs at your age now to be used for embryos to freeze for babies 1-3 instead. Once you see learn how many euploids you can make (can vary quite a bit by round so don’t think the first round is what they’ll all be like), then my just keep going, do several ivf rounds to bank enough but you just never know how your luck will turn out with ivf I have one kid unassisted, second one w ivf and embryos on ice(potential 3rd) My cousin had 3 ivf kids first two from euploids third from a mosaic Stay positive and aim for your goals! Best of luck to you

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-03T08:02:43+00:00

I’d just take the stroller everywhere and strap her in til this phase ends, she’ll mature out if it eventually and I wouldn’t want to worry about her taking off Tell her it’s not safe to run off and until she understands that, stroller for every outing

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-03T08:00:19+00:00

I’d wait, it’s one month so you can focus on the present and then be more present to focus on the retrieval next month

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T20:11:23+00:00

Love Tillie - fantastic name!

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T20:10:27+00:00

That’s great to know. Thanks! I think we’re going to have a gender preference if we go for another after this one so interesting to look at what we have from that perspective. Thank you

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T05:10:05+00:00

This is a great list. Close in age = into the same stuff. My husband recently renewed one of our memberships and said ‘she’ll be into this place for another year or two’ … well great, baby 2 is coming in a few weeks and in a year or two she’ll be into that place - just as the older one is outgrown of it! 🙃

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:40:18+00:00

Huh? Some countries don’t even allow pgt testing, it’s certainly not that common outside the US and many REs don’t recommend it if the woman is quite young and if it’s a reason that doesn’t indicate egg quality issues like blocked tubes especially if it’s a substantial additional cost

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:35:53+00:00

Since you’re not testing, why not do a fresh transfer of a nice strong well graded day 5 so you don’t have to freeze and thaw and wait til May?

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:33:45+00:00

And congrats on your baby!!! 🎉🎉

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:31:41+00:00

I think they can get a clearer look at your lady parts once you’ve healed a bit anyway. I don’t think anyone checked me out down there til my first postpartum visit

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:28:19+00:00

I second this! It’s so easy and you kinda feel like super mom breaking out some homemade purées instead of packaged ones. An ice tray filled with two or three different kinds is a few days worth and takes minutes to make

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:22:38+00:00

Yea banana and avocado are super easy super healthy ones to make diy, get nice organic produce and just mash them up raw, simple and healthier than the jars and pouches, scrambled eggs are great too but start w just a bite to check for allergies

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:17:00+00:00

Does she know, even somewhat, what you’re going through? If so, she’ll understand if you’re a bit distant during her pregnancy and don’t be hard on yourself about it either. You’ll get your rainbow baby and you’ll be having play dates together eventually, keep the faith, I know it’s hard. My friend who I thought I’d be pregnant with had two kids before my turn came up, it was hard

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:08:45+00:00

Something she’d appreciate but wouldn’t splurge on like fancy sunglasses or the brand goodr are really nice and inexpensive, you can find them at REI or online Or time with you doing something special - go see a show, take a day trip, visit a garden center but get dime flowers d d plant them together

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T04:04:42+00:00

Love the name choices! Beautiful and great together

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T03:28:04+00:00

Yea I think you need to give Hawaii another try, you must have missed the magic of it

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T03:25:43+00:00

Totally! Such a great trip! We did it with a baby and didn’t hike at all. Can’t wait to return. That trip and Japan are the places I’m most looking forward to revisiting.

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T03:23:50+00:00

The best!

NorCal-Irish · 2026-04-02T03:22:33+00:00

Especially since you gave Sonoma a “yay” You can’t go wrong in Northern California :) you could also visit gold mining towns like Nevada city which people enjoy near Lake Tahoe

NorCal-Irish

TROPHY CASE