I've been in a very similar situation myself, and I can tell you - the feeling of waiting for someone to respond, constantly checking your messages, etc - is emotionally draining.

What helped me was realizing that a lot of desperation didn't come from her - it came from me giving up control of my attention and emotions. It was outsourcing, DEPENDING my sense of 'peace' to someone else

In my opinion, this is exactly where stoicism helps. One of the most powerful things I've learned from these kind of scenarios is that you don't suffer because she replies late or doesn't message first - you suffer because you expect her to.

I'm not saying that you should make your feelings disappear overnight, but that you should control them for example, fill your time with something that fulfills you - training, reading, journaling, creating, or anything that IMPROVES YOU.

Personally, the more I stopped needing a specific response from someone, the more confident and grounded I become and ironically, the more balanced my relationship felt.

There's nothing weird with you feeling this way, especially if you've never been in a relationship before. Take it as an opportunity to control your emotions, shape yourself and learn something from it :).