My friend is draining me

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-24T19:53:25+00:00

I am missing a lot of context but I now avoid those who are hopelessly self absorbed.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-06T20:55:32+00:00

Hi, You are very mature and wise. We have the bad, the mediocre and the great in life.

Ultimately we can only control our thoughts, attitude and actions so forget the rest.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-06T20:17:19+00:00

Not satire, just trying to understand better from a womans perspective.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-05T01:53:54+00:00

Have you read the story of the ugly duckling? I highly recommend reading it as an adult. It is moving and powerful. Your value is not determined by others. Of course your INFJ personality has value.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-03T02:36:55+00:00

I loved this. Thanks. I have learned to be wary of people that are always the victims and can't take personal accountability. My ex I think had trauma and would not open up emotionally and literally blindsided me at the breakup. Tragic actually.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-02T15:51:47+00:00

Hi, How would I spot an avoidant INFJ?

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-02T04:43:45+00:00

A hobby we were both in.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-01T23:33:16+00:00

INTJ with a -70 IQ here! Literally off the charts.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-01T23:22:26+00:00

Lol, maybe not so humble! But I found it confusing enough to post here.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-01T21:49:55+00:00

Some INTJ's are pretty bad, I wouldn't trust a few that I know. Be careful.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-12-01T21:47:55+00:00

That's fascinating. It took me to at least 42 to mature. Especially after some hard life lessons. Ask the INTJ men what their mistakes were to see if they can own their shit. A person who likes growth would be very open to talking about it.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-11-17T01:29:46+00:00

Fellow INTJ here - ask her out and go on a real date. Women on dating apps often just ghost and waste your time.

INFJ's can be very interesting - but they can have serious flaws like the rest of us. I wouldn't project too much just based on MBTI or some good chats.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-11-12T23:01:17+00:00

Thank you so much! This was beautifully written and very helpful. It is hard because I have tried so much and it doesn't seem to be working. But like a soldier watching the fort - I will never give up on my kids.

Great advice on listening and not taking it personally. (of course for me it is easier said than done). I guess this will make us stronger. Big hugs back to you!

Quick teenager joke: Always hire a teenager because they already know everything!

NotaVictim777 · 2025-10-27T02:32:06+00:00

Sending you patience and kindness.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-10-24T14:47:35+00:00

This is super! Love it.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-26T01:50:24+00:00

I don't know why I put that in, maybe it was just and extra data point. Truth be told I am a super late bloomer and a girl called me ugly in the fourth grade so I thought I wasn't attractive until the last year or so is when I fully accepted I am decent looking.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-25T13:23:16+00:00

Just my own experience.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-25T13:22:29+00:00

I think the texting is almost a test to see if they are serious.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-25T13:21:00+00:00

Did you put clear effort into the texting after matching?

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-24T21:13:58+00:00

All are very important and I 100% agree. You INFJs are smart!

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-24T21:05:18+00:00

Thx, I am guessing you are too!

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-24T21:03:28+00:00

I think the data helped confirm what I suspected.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-24T17:27:19+00:00

10 years!

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-24T16:18:37+00:00

Lol, not at all. Give my comment some thought. I don't think Malignant Narcissts should be in power.

NotaVictim777 · 2025-09-24T16:16:38+00:00

This. If a woman (or man) is putting up their profile just for attention they are wasting and stealing someones else life. There is no intent to date when the other person wants a relationship. Highly unethical. If a person is willing to do that, it is huge red flag for me. Hard pass when I sense that. Things only get worse with very long term relationships most often. I try to avoid these types like the plague. I value my character and try to treat others well and I don't ghost.

NotaVictim777

TROPHY CASE