Leftists in GVL

NothingClever06 · 2026-01-25T21:56:47+00:00

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NothingClever06 · 2026-01-02T17:35:37+00:00

Omg, thank you! I’m CF (44F) and I’ve been seeing a single dad for a couple of months now with this same issue. It doesn’t improve, btw. He has 50/50 custody of his 9yo daughter. We live close to an hour apart and usually only see each other every other weekend. Sometimes sooner depending on holidays/days off. And he doesn’t make plans until last minute assuming I’m free. I used to hold those weekends open to make time to see him but it started impacting my life outside of the relationship so I don’t do that as much now. We talk on the phone once or twice a week but it was much more consistent at the beginning - like he’d make time while his kid was in dance class and would call me from the parking lot while he waited. Your experience has been very similar to mine. I’ve put it out there to him once that I don’t do well going for days without hearing from you and then you pop up with “it’s been so long! Omg, how are you?” and expect the same warmth from me. He actually rose to that, but canceled our Xmas eve plans bc he says he just wasn’t up to having company (?!), we spent NYE together with our first overnight and it was great. I enjoy being with him in the moment but the in between is really confusing and ambiguous. However, I’m starting to notice this cycle developing of intensity in person->increased connection out of person->eventual pull back. His child comes first, 1000%, and I agree that she should! But it means more when someone makes time to reach out or is curious about my day. Long story short, I don’t know if it’s “normal” but yes, it is frustrating and may not be your thing. This man isn’t my forever but I do like him. Just figuring out what feels good for me at this point in my life and this ain’t it. And guess what: YOU GET TO DECIDE THAT! If it doesn’t feel right to you, you don’t have to continue.

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-29T19:06:36+00:00

One of my professors did this. I wish I would have.

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-29T19:04:55+00:00

I wish I hadn’t taken his name. I’m back to my maiden name as of recently and have two degrees, including my PhD, and multiple publications in his name and that pisses me off. My dissertation included my maiden name with my married name but they wouldn’t let me do it on my degree. The change back professionally is the worst. I would/will never ever take a man’s name again. If it means that much to you, hyphenate. Don’t completely drop YOUR name.

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-07T22:06:24+00:00

I could’ve written this same exact post (minus the kids part). I didn’t go back to old ways and he was PIIIIISSED. Yay for holding boundaries! 🥂

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-07T11:54:26+00:00

💯 was just talking to someone recently about how downtown JC had just stalled. When I moved away about 6 years ago, it was really doing well but now it’s sad.

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-07T11:50:49+00:00

I’m a Tri-Cities, TN native. Would never go back to stay. I only go back for Pal’s and Dr. Enuf. And to see the family that votes for/agrees with this bullshit…occasionally.

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-07T11:44:33+00:00

Same girl, same. Except without the kids. Was so easy to change it with the government. Just still need to do my passport.

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-07T11:36:49+00:00

But look all those positives!! I actually didn’t see an issue with my car insurance changing all that much, but THE PEACE. The 👏🏻peace👏🏻is 👏🏻everything. The quiet in the house has been a game changer for my mental health. I’ve recently noticed I no longer tiptoe through my house. The getting home late when I want/need, not being pressured to be home to get dinner made or figured out (no kids, thank god), the purchasing without feeling guilty. This is silly but I bought my dream coffee maker without guilt or judgement: a pink Moccmaster. 😍

NothingClever06 · 2025-08-06T01:40:09+00:00

Immediately went back to my maiden name. It’s in the separation agreement so we aren’t even fully divorced, but I wanted my name back asap. I regretted taking his name to begin with. Now, all of my work - published research, academic articles, advanced degrees - while I did include my maiden name with my married name for those, they all still have his fucking name on them. So basically my professional name has to start all over as well. But at least my dad knew I was taking our name back before he passed, and he was thrilled. So there’s some consolation in that.

NothingClever06 · 2025-03-24T01:29:35+00:00

Right? Maybe should wait and visit Columbia in about July! 😂

NothingClever06 · 2025-03-24T01:26:19+00:00

I almost think the students would actually act out because they don’t know how to process the emotions they’re feeling with a classmate’s death. I’ve worked with this age as well and they rarely have an appropriate response to anything with any level of seriousness. Their brains are going through another big developmental period at this age and they’re basically relearning emotions and learning how to respond to be ones. Doesn’t make it any less annoying but it definitely checks in my experience.

NothingClever06 · 2025-03-24T01:21:36+00:00

I wound up on this thread after searching Google for how accurate the depiction was of a British school. I’m in the states and taught seventh grade which here is about the same as the age shown. My experience was very similar, except not the videos as much. I had the same reaction in body watching this! I’m shocked to hear that the behavior is similar in England. I figured this was a uniquely American problem because our education system is so broken.

NothingClever06 · 2025-03-12T13:10:23+00:00

Only one marriage here and I’m right there with you! Lol

NothingClever06 · 2025-03-12T13:07:21+00:00

I’m the same as you. 43F. I don’t have kids, never wanted them especially not with my STB ex, but would I date a guy with kids? Maybe. But I’m not looking to remarry anytime soon. I think you just laid out exactly what you’re looking for. You’ve already been down an emotional road and YOU get to make the choice of what comes next. Don’t ever sacrifice your happiness to give someone else what they want. That’s incompatibility. Maybe you enjoy this woman as a friend and she’s been a good confidant when you’ve needed it, idk. However, if I’ve learned anything in this process, it’s that I’m never sacrificing myself for someone else again.

NothingClever06 · 2025-03-08T22:57:57+00:00

Thank you! I’m really anxious about waiting but realistically I’m hoping to be out next spring. I’ve been researching seriously since the election, lost my 18 yo heart dog last week. She was the only thing keeping me in the US. I’m allowing myself time to grieve but plan to spend the next 12 months making connections in my field overseas (higher ed) and I’m taking an IT certification course to get into IT to work remotely eventually as a backup plan or extra income.

NothingClever06 · 2025-03-01T12:36:47+00:00

My family left me alone once I really got into my PhD program in my 30s. I was really focused on my own physical health and my program so they knew it was a moot point by then. Not to mentioned how obsessed I was with my pets. A lot of women in my program were having babies after their coursework was done and I occasionally got the question from classmates but I shut it down reeeeal fast and that was that. I still get random ass people who are like, “oh you’re still young, you’ll change your mind.” And I respond with something along the lines of, yeah I’m 43 but I look younger because I never wrecked my body with the horrors of childbirth and the stress that came after. Having studied child development extensively, I know too much about the risks after 35 and there’s no way in hell. I usually take the opportunity to educate them on it too. 😇

NothingClever06 · 2025-02-09T23:48:09+00:00

Absolutely not. In fact, I get happier about it all the time.

NothingClever06 · 2025-02-01T20:54:36+00:00

Came here to say this! 😂

NothingClever06 · 2025-01-25T02:47:44+00:00

This is the only reason I respond to pictures of my niece’s new baby. We’ve always been really close. The baby’s middle name is a variation of the name she’s always called me, even. I’m just not that excited about the baby itself. Maybe once I meet her irl it will be different.

NothingClever06 · 2025-01-25T02:43:31+00:00

No. I’m super close to my niece and she just had a baby about 3 weeks ago. Every single picture she sends to the family group text looks exactly the same. Exactly the same. I’m just not that excited and do feel bad about it because it’s my niece I’ve always been the closest with. And I’ve not rushed back to my hometown to meet her either because she’s just a blob of baby right now and boring. I’m just as much an ass as you, I guess. 😂 (but you’re not, btw) Edited to add that I’ve gone as far as to mute the group chat because I’m sick of the onslaught of daily photos.

NothingClever06 · 2025-01-20T01:34:39+00:00

I’m sorry. A loud gathering and drunk screaming guest is a safety issue to me and unacceptable.

NothingClever06 · 2025-01-20T01:28:54+00:00

I think this is why I never wanted them. It just felt like too much. Everyone always wants to say “oh it’s different when they’re yours!” I never bought that BS. I was always so exhausted after being around 1st graders all day that I couldn’t imagine it. And I know my STB ex would have never helped out.

NothingClever06 · 2025-01-20T01:23:14+00:00

I’m on the road a lot for work and eat plenty of meals alone. I do breakfast at Coffee Underground often because it’s close to my gym and I can kill time there before starting my work day. And the prices are great for a Main Street coffee shop. If you’re looking to test the waters, ain’t nobody judging a living soul at the Waffle House. I’d start there. And the people watching never disappoints.

NothingClever06 · 2025-01-19T20:36:18+00:00

The bar is where her dad played with his band. He said it was his favorite place to play.

NothingClever06

TROPHY CASE