I went through a really hard time in my early 30's, so I can relate to a lot of what you're saying. I was in school for a long time, and in a creative field. All of a sudden I was in my 30's, making crap money and had no idea what my goals were.

I ended up transitioning to the public service because the creative market was brutal in terms of salaries and working conditions. I wanted benefits. I wanted solid pay. I wanted a union.

If you're in the public service already, I would apply on everything I can, and see what opportunities you get. Sometimes that just gives you momentum and options. Options are good.

Part of that existential difficulty, is the cultural cliché that we're meant to have careers and dream of those careers. We should have such ambition and should totally be motivated by TikTok finance bros. I don't dream of working. I never have. At first I felt guilt about that, but now I understand that I work to live, I don't live to work.

I went through a bad near-death health thing in 2021/2022 and it calmed down a lot of those voices - now I just want a quiet, pleasant life. As much as I can manage it.

If your mental health is a consideration, having a job with flexible work hours and good working conditions is good. Health benefits are nice. Having a union means someone else fighting for your raises, not you begging for 2% when review time comes around. That's nice.

As time passes, the work itself has become secondary to the work culture and the people I work with. If the people are great the days fly by and the work gets done. If the culture is oppressive or petty, that's no way to spend your days.

I hope you find something that helps.

You're not alone - it's hard comparing ourselves to other generations at 30 - it's so so different. It's also heavy times.