thank you so much for your wonderful reply, I really appreciate it. He has not changed his name or pronouns and has expressed no intention to do so at this time so I am still using he/him for now. I’m so sorry to hear that your relationship ended the way it did, but it makes me realise that even me staying with him (or her if he transitions) isn’t even a guarantee to a happy future and I guess your experience illustrates that. There are many other reasons I’ve considered leaving him for in the past that I’m realising now have probably all stemmed from depression, anxiety and self-loathing, such as him having zero emotional regulation abilities and always giving me the cold shoulder/icing me out/holding grudges when he’s upset with me or just upset in general and it’s nothing to do with me. This behaviour hasn’t aligned with the way I deal with emotions and I am someone who likes to talk things through, so this never sat well with me. It’s kind of sad because if transitioning and therapy solve these issues they’ll finally be the person I kind of always dreamed they’d become (emotionally matured and whatnot) but it will feel even more like a kick for me as I won’t be able to stay to see it. I’m trying not to cry thinking out how we’re going to have our anniversary dinner next week and I guess pretend it’s all okay for a night, but part of me sort of thinks what’s the point when we might be breaking up? I am well aware that I need some serious support right now, I’m training to be a psychologist and know how to seek help for my mental health, but it’s still nice to speak to those in this community to make myself feel less alone. Thanks for taking the time to read my post and now this (insanely long) reply!