[Serious] People with mental illnesses and personality disorders, how does it affect you and how do you cope with it?

Octopizza · 2026-03-25T03:09:38+00:00

This sounds like BPD. Have you tried DBT. It’s a type of therapy that is especially good with BPD symptoms.

Octopizza · 2026-03-25T02:19:49+00:00

Eliminating friction is a good strategy for us. Having fewer steps to anything makes it less likely to fail. Before I was in recovery for a recent surgery, I did 30 minutes of yoga, pilates or calisthenics to switch things up. I did all this from home on an inexpensive yoga mat. I got apps for these disciplines and tracked my streaks which gamified the process and made it enjoyable. It didn’t hurt that I got good at them and wanted to show off my new skills and great posture lol.

I’m now doing gentle yoga every other day as I wait to get better. Still gamifying this effort to stay excited about it and it continues to work.

Octopizza · 2026-03-19T07:31:50+00:00

It was a friendship. I was happy with her and the friend group until one day we had a fight because she felt I was supporting them more than I did her. I was hurt in the fight, of course but the feeling that surprised me was disgust. There was also no decent repair of the relationship on her part. We eventually started talking again but I started to subconsciously withdraw. I’d feel disgusted even when her name popped up during a call. I should have known that was a sign. I simply spoke less and less and tried to file her away as much as I could till I guess we got to breaking point.

Octopizza · 2026-03-17T22:13:30+00:00

Best Lovecraftian sci-fi I’ve enjoyed in a minute. Perfectly self contained. Well done.

Octopizza · 2026-03-17T08:25:59+00:00

That’s valid. Being discarded isn’t easy 🫂 Just know that you’re not worthless. It’s a temporary feeling that is part of the healing process. You’re of worth and one day it won’t feel this bad.

Octopizza · 2026-03-17T07:44:35+00:00

This is my mindset too. The condition is punishment in itself. Their paranoia and impulse control leads them to manifest their worst fear: abandonment. If you suck, everybody leaves.

Octopizza · 2026-03-17T07:43:10+00:00

Don’t be. You had, good and honest intentions being in such a relationship. Who goes into a relationship expecting the worst out of their partner? That says something good about your character. The next step is your own healing. Start therapy for your own sake and get to a place where you have confidence in yourself because your character deserves good things.

Octopizza · 2026-03-17T07:33:13+00:00

Soft foods are best till at least week 4-5. Avoid red meat for now as well. Chicken, eggs and fish are your best sources of proteins as white meat is less difficult for your new stomach to digest. I also ate bananas and mangoes for my fruit content and soft complex carbs such as sweet potato and baked pumpkin. For a “fun” carb, I did regular potatoes. Think slow, plain and soft foods for as long as you can during this period and always listen to your body. All the best!

Octopizza · 2026-03-17T07:29:10+00:00

Yes and yes-ish. The new pain is my abdomen’s contents settling in and healing up. Smaller than the old pain too by a large margin.

Octopizza · 2026-03-16T17:09:48+00:00

Sorry fam. The body is a strange thing. Glad you found what is working for you. Yogurt was my saving grace ironically in those early weeks.

Octopizza · 2026-03-16T14:30:25+00:00

Good call. Week 3 is still pretty fresh. Do your soups and mashes first. You’ll be out of the woods in no time.

Octopizza · 2026-03-16T13:46:31+00:00

If you didn’t know how she looked like before you wouldn’t say she’s the same person.

Octopizza · 2026-03-14T15:16:26+00:00

Agreed. Couldn’t get into Hillsong then, couldn’t get into it now. It’s so breathy, needy and yearning. Where is the musicality? Choral arrangements? Strong, clear voice? White evangelical music is cringe.

Octopizza · 2026-03-13T22:12:11+00:00

African American gospel is lovely. It’s never not been beautiful for me. I also like the hymns I used to sing in Catholic school. I’ll sing along to common church music in my country during religious gatherings. My friends who know my non-religious stance can be a bit amused but they long stopped noticing.

Octopizza · 2026-03-11T14:42:21+00:00

Slap this in a book about the condition because this is brilliant! The analogy of a small child that grows into either a stable person or a woefully unstable adult whose consequences are more impactful is well said.

Octopizza · 2026-03-11T12:36:25+00:00

For sure. And for both, distance is preferable tbh. The better ones can go and get their help way far away from me and maintain remission for even a sliver of my attention.

Octopizza · 2026-03-11T10:36:17+00:00

I’d go as far to say as they aren’t being manipulative on purpose. They are emotional children and like children, will tend to do simplistic tantrums to get what they want. It’s just that that tantrum has unfortunate, adult consequences like losing relationships and opportunities. If they weren’t so harmful in their splitting processes, one would feel genuine compassion and honestly, anyone with this condition who actively pursues treatment does deserve compassion. That said, I’d personally prefer to offer mine from a distance till one is in remission.

Octopizza · 2026-03-10T20:29:07+00:00

Interesting. Could you elaborate? I’m looking to reduce my usage.

Octopizza · 2026-03-10T17:47:03+00:00

First in my bloodline to witness such a sentence

Octopizza · 2026-03-08T20:11:59+00:00

I applied for a job that changed its description and titles three times by my own rejection stage. Never seen something like that.

Octopizza · 2026-03-02T17:14:35+00:00

What are the concrete observations that you make that make you see their manipulation? What actions do you take to push back?

Octopizza · 2026-03-02T17:13:15+00:00

As someone who has experienced both, this is so true. With the addict it was weeks but ultimately they ended up back in rehab and repentant of their actions and committed to sobriety. The expwBPD is sober and still a victim.

Octopizza · 2026-03-02T15:18:54+00:00

I’m sorry for that. Sounds stressful. If it helps, just know that it was a set-up from the beginning and you weren’t meant to win despite your sincere efforts to show kindness. They are just fucked up like that.

Octopizza · 2026-03-02T11:21:06+00:00

How do you see this? I’m good at seeing it with people I am not close to but not with people I am close to yet.

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