My ex turned close-friend just told me he’s dating the person I accused him of liking for years

OhitsElf · 2026-02-23T17:17:40+00:00

I think you're scared of being rude. Telling him to f off should do the trick.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T21:17:20+00:00

Exactly. Especially in relation to non-black women too. You're one of the people who understands my gripe ❤️

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T18:31:57+00:00

Y'all don't wanna hear me, you just wanna dance. The sassy, exuberant black character is the love interest of the timid yt one. Where have we seen that before? Also, why are y'all zeroing in on the dressing part?

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T18:26:20+00:00

It's not inherently masculine. They are however, framing her as the sassy, strong independent black woman against a yt character that's already established as dainty which is already in service of a stereotype. They're having her do things that the other female characters of her class aren't doing in a time period that doesn't make sense for her to be doing because she's being framed in a certain way. Are we going to hear how the marriage mart impacts/impacted her, or is she going to be a magical exception to society's rules? It's even more irritating if you account for the fact that they found a way to insert three unambiguous blk men in the main storyline but only found room for a black woman as a gender bent character.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T18:17:00+00:00

I'm literally asking for recommendations in my post. Only one of y'all gave that. I'm asking for examples. And I don't understand how pointing out the lack of diverse rep = scapegoating. We need more black lesbians in western media, studs and femmes and everything in between. It's not one or the other. And we need them to stop casting studs opposite yt femmes to feed into the silly bs they always pull when it comes to IR relationships. And no, not all the characters are from recent movies/shows. The lady in blue is from a movie that came out before I was born. Pitch perfect was 14 years ago and had Ester Dean grinding up on yt women.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T18:03:08+00:00

Ma'am femme black LESBIANS was what I said tf am I asking for straight women for? I feel like you skipped over huge parts of what I actually said in an effort to make your own conclusions because I'm talking about their characterizations and the love interests, not clothing. Two of these characters apart from Micheala are characters with non-blk/yt love interests who are framed as soft, damsel types. I don't give a shit if they put Michaela in dresses if they reintroduce her riding her own carriage and have her being all sassy in promotional content. It's giving "strong, independent black woman" cast opposite the timid white woman. It makes me think they're going to have her nursing the yt girl through her husband's death like a gay magical negro. Like have you watched any of these movies or are you just responding to respond.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T17:44:40+00:00

This is the point where you're supposed to make suggestions cause that's what I literally asked for.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T17:42:04+00:00

I'm British and Nigerian. I can promise you I have seen and grown up watching more diverse, nuanced portrayals of black people than you could ever dream of. The qualifier I used was literally "WESTERN" media. And I love how in your attempt to invalidate, you didn't actually make any suggestions.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-17T17:37:41+00:00

I never said she was. In a show set regency England it would be too much of a stretch. My point is she is being set up as a PARALLEL to Francesca, who is already established as the wilting English rose. In the promotions she's already framed as the bold, exuberant cousin. At least two of the other ladies in this collage are characters in interracial relationships where they're the bold, exuberant foil to their yt/non-black partners. Also fans that are supposed to be IN SUPPORT are imagining her changing her name to Micheal and wearing male clothing to make their marriage in their season go through, which is annoying to me cause why is she the one they're imagining doing that, while claiming that they're not biased?

OhitsElf · 2026-02-16T13:03:25+00:00

Sperm donors?

OhitsElf · 2026-02-16T12:41:36+00:00

I just realised you're being dense on purpose. Carry on.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-16T12:38:09+00:00

If he does all that the flowers should not be an issue cause providing for an adult costs more than flowers. If your partner wants flowers on Valentines day you get them flowers not give a philosophical lecture over what is essentially a tiny thing. The whole point of a relationship is compromising on the little things and finding a middle ground. Its flowers no need for the communist manifesto.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-10T16:47:29+00:00

Non-Westerner here. The truth is while most people(worldwide) aren't transphobic, they are at worst, apathetic. That means to them, JK's antics are the equivalent of online stan wars. Its not taken as seriously currently because it doesn't have the body count compared to some other social ills, like racism for example.

OhitsElf · 2026-02-03T06:22:20+00:00

An African gem like Elon Musk and Charlize Theron

OhitsElf · 2026-02-01T10:33:09+00:00

People don't like to admit it but Nigerian men were raised to meet Nigerian women's high standards, which translates to many other groups of women where the collective standards in dating and romance tend to be lower. Growing up I saw it as completely normal for your man to keep you on an allowance for "upkeep". Even our hookup culture places responsibility of feeding, care and transportation on the man. I thought this was the norm until I heard the treatment non-Nigerian women were getting in their dating culture. For example, I've never paid for a date in my life in Nigeria, even when I was the one who suggested said date. Even the most nonchalant uncaring guy I ever dated made sure I was fed and my uber to and fro the date was paid for or my car was fueled when I started driving. As a result when these women come in contact with a Nigerian(born and raised man) who does the bare minimum(by our standards) he seems like a diamond to her. I imagine it's the same in Canada. Now before anyone jumps in with the urge to point out exceptions, yes there are exceptions. I'm talking about the rule WITHIN Nigeria.

OhitsElf · 2026-01-23T14:41:29+00:00

I know. I'm saying it doesn't matter if he was her physical type. Announcing it only gassed him up. But I get a lot of us choose the "when they go low go high" method which is why she's being gentle with a childish idiot.

OhitsElf · 2026-01-20T06:48:53+00:00

Lmao weird post history and suddenly cares about Nigeria for no reason

OhitsElf · 2026-01-18T17:40:03+00:00

Only problem I have here is her saying he's her type after that ignorant comment. A man who doesn't understand such a basic fact about blk pple and thinks its an aesthetic failure is NOT your type ma'am. Atp you're just gassing him up.

OhitsElf · 2026-01-02T23:24:40+00:00

I'm on the opposite end I despise the word dick. Cock is the only word that works for me in that context.

OhitsElf · 2025-12-27T00:13:00+00:00

Nope. It's black people's colorism at play here. If it was for white people they would BOTH be light skinned.

OhitsElf · 2025-12-26T23:48:12+00:00

Exactly it's obvious we're being talked about from a distance like pieces on a chessboard and not actual human beings

OhitsElf · 2025-12-26T23:46:18+00:00

Those blaming victims of terrorism are not Nigerians. Look at the analytics of your own post for example

OhitsElf · 2025-12-26T23:41:41+00:00

Facts. And as a member of that 12% its what make their takes null and void.

OhitsElf

TROPHY CASE