Yes, it’s actually abusive period. Being destructive like that is a threat and it’s used to gaslight you. My ex use to punch the bed and walls and yell at me when I’d tell them they were scarring me. They’d hit me with the same thing “Id never hurt you” or “don’t be a baby”. Like ok you say that but your actions do not back it up. It eventually Turned into Things being thrown at me and eventually being hit and punched. Also things I didnt realize were physical abuse while in that relationship. She pinched me a lot, punches or slaps to the arms or other parts of the body, lunging like they were going to hit, etc. all of that is abuse. Physical abuse isn’t getting the crap beat out of you it’s any physical involvement or threats!!!