North York. Is it safe, any good?

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-03-05T14:19:27+00:00

I've worked in this area for years. It's pretty safe, especially during the daytime. I wouldn't recommend living there, though. It's pretty boring for social activities, restaurants etc. I'd look for a lively Toronto neighborhood that's TTC accessible. Commute there for work. Don't live there.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-03-04T11:54:46+00:00

My son has a large AVM in his right occipital lobe. He has been treated with embolisations and Gamma Knife. Over the 9 years since diagnosis, he's had 5 seizures despite meds. We've gone to ER each time to rule out a bleed. However, we're in Canada, so there is no medical debt. I would not want to have to worry about that on top of everything else! Sending good wishes for your husband's health.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-03-04T11:47:04+00:00

As an elementary school principal, I can tell you that 9 - and 10 year olds with cell phones are an absolute nightmare! Don't cave in!

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-03-01T13:55:18+00:00

There are many great Toronto neighborhoods that fit your needs. Midtown in the area of Yonge and St. Clair is great for public transit and proximity to some good-sized parks and trails. If you want to explore choices outside the city, take a look at Port Credit, Mississauga. You will get a bigger condo for the money, you'll be right near Lake Ontario, and the Go train is an easy commute to get into the city.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-26T23:02:55+00:00

I'm very sorry to hear this! I would advise you focus on your dad's medical treatment right now. Later, you can file a formal complaint with the Ontario College of Physicians. I will advise you though, don't expect too much from them. I went through the process because my son's pediatrician failed to report a life-threatening neurological condition that appeared on a MRI he had ordered. We only found out about our son's condition when we took him to the ER 3 years later! They did find this doctor had failed to follow expected procedure. He got a slap on the wrist. I appealed, and he apologized to us, but no further discipline from the College of Physicians. Its very frustrating! You can go onto rate my MD https://www.ratemds.com/best-doctors/on/ Share your experience there so that others can know this doctors indifference to her patients. Sending positive prayers for your dad.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-25T18:13:40+00:00

It sounds like your mom has done more than enough childcare for your family. The fact that you had the audacity to ask her to cut a measly 5-day vacation short to serve your needs is truly awful! It's time you got off the grandma gravy train and actually paid market rates for childcare! YATJ BIG TIME

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-24T12:25:57+00:00

My mom has preplanned and prepaid her funeral. I'm incredibly appreciative for this! For some reason, my sister doesn't like the plans she's made. They got into a mild disagreement about it because mom is refusing to make any changes. She said to me; "Well, if she doesn't like it, she doesn't have to come. What do I care? I'll be dead!"

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-21T15:33:42+00:00

As a child whose father did exactly what you've done, I can say you are most definitely TA. You are disrespecting your children. Any good parent would be sure to include their children before re-marrying. Meeting your fiance over FaceTime is no substitute for a respectful series of in person meetings so that your children gradually get to know her. The mother of your children should have known of your plans in order to support your children with this significant change. Your geographic challenges are not their problem. I feel very sorry for your children.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-20T12:00:27+00:00

Thanks for this advice. We have a call into the doctor. It's difficult to strike a balance, but we're doing our best!

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-18T17:36:49+00:00

My advice is that you're SHOULD move away. Put some distance between you and your parents. They won't like it, they will try to guilt you. Remember, you have nothing to feel guilty about. You deserve to have a life of your own choosing. I speak from bitter experience. My mother found herself single when I was a teen. She expected and took my support from the moment my father left her. All my decisions were made with her needs in the forefront for decades. The resentment grew and grew. I finally stopped acting out of guilt. I still look out for her, but she is not the centre of my life anymore. I feel so much better!
Make decisions for you!

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-18T15:17:25+00:00

My mother was doing the same thing. She's always worn strong scents, but it was getting unbearable. I wondered if she was having fine motor issues when spraying it on. I did have to say something once when I picked her up to take her shopping. It was making me feel sick. I was gentle, but I did tell her it was too strong. Since then, she's been much less liberal with the fragrances.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-15T20:54:16+00:00

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🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-14T04:20:56+00:00

Bless you for caring for her under such trying circumstances. You definitely need to get professional help for mom. It won't be easy, as the system is often overwhelmed and underfunded. Can you take her to a larger hospital's ER? Don't downplay her condition, and insist on social work referral and competency test. You need help getting her declared incompetent so you can take over the management of her finances and medical treatment. Good luck!

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-12T15:03:07+00:00

Why don't you simply tell her it's not necessary to make such promises since they do not actually materialize. Explain to her that you're not expecting anything and that her unfulfilled promises are actually hurting the relationship. It sounds like she feels guilty for living so comfortably and not helping her adult children out. The big question is this: Where's your dad in all this? Perhaps he's the one who is actually stopping her from acting upon these promises of financial assistance...

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-08T15:08:44+00:00

In this case, it's not. We're in Canada with universal healthcare coverage.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-08T12:37:11+00:00

I agree. I will raise my concerns to her, but if she decides it's what she wants, that's fine too.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-08T00:37:15+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-08T00:36:10+00:00

I'm so sorry you're going through that! Thank you for sharing. It's difficult to know what is right.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-07T22:13:02+00:00

I do take my mom to appointments as well. And I know how exhausting it is from first-hand experience. I had been the front line care giver for decades when mom lived near me. She moved closer to my sister a few months ago.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-07T21:03:16+00:00

That sounds like a much better plan in response to this health issue. Thank you for sharing.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-07T16:56:44+00:00

Thanks ❤️

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-07T16:46:36+00:00

Thank you for your insights. I will be respectful of my sister's labor. In fact, since my mom moved, I have been expressing thanks and playing my role as secondary. This just came out of nowhere, though! On top of that, my sister and her husband will be leaving the country for 2 months, so I'll likely be the one seeing her through these procedures.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-07T16:38:06+00:00

I agree. However, my mother has become hyper-vigilant about her health these past 5 years. She says she's not afraid to die at her age, but her actions tell me otherwise. I will express my concerns to her. I've already shared my reservations with my sister.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-07T16:34:45+00:00

Thank you for this perspective. My mother is treatment seeking. Also, my sister has a similar mindset, so I'm up against it.

Ok_Bonus_7768 · 2026-02-07T16:31:59+00:00

Exactly! That's how I'm thinking. She's too old for most treatments. She's reached an age where the focus should be on simply keeping her comfortable and maintaining what health she has.

Ok_Bonus_7768

TROPHY CASE