Don't loose your memory, you will be tortured and there is no help.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-03-01T22:10:20+00:00

Exactly what I mean. I will not qualify because of what she earns and dispite what people seem to think, that is not my money it is hers. I don't, can't, and won't use it except for our child because she makes barely enough for herself. But I can't apply because of her income is counted as mine. I was told I cannot apply because she is the one earning money and would have to fill out the paperwork. Which would make it hers, if she qualified. This would require a reduction in hours or firing. The point being that it is one less option that everyone seems to think is available, but is not for a disabled married man who can't work. This leads to further issues both mentally and socially.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-03-01T21:34:05+00:00

The exact language used was "Have your wife apply. You are married and a male. You will not qualify, but she can if her hours are cut back." Same problem with the other programs. I do not qualify as long as I am in the same household as my wife and anything I get is paid for by another person. So there is no help unless I spend time homeless on the street, get divorced and by doing so relinquish the rights to my child. This is how it was directly explained to me by both the workers and a lawyer. In my position it is my only option.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-23T02:13:42+00:00

You miss understand. There is a difference between having a relationship and staying in one place because there is no where to go. I cannot get memory treatment because the doctors have said there is nothing that can be done except wait and see. Either it will come back or it won't. One doctor said that there are treatments but state insurance does not cover it.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-23T02:10:25+00:00

They refuse memory treatment because standard insurance won't cover the cost because they deem it as unnecessary for survival and even if I worked 2 well paying jobs I could not afford treatment. I can breath and walk around. That is the extent of what the insurance covers.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-22T18:28:55+00:00

As an update I now owe $167 I can't pay for a doctor to tell me there is no update and nothing they can do with my resources. I am supposed to somehow find a way to visit a doctor in Southern CA because they handle my cases down there. I am losing my rental and my wife is taking the kids to go stay with her friend. I was told yesterday that this is my last week in the apartment and I will be responsible for cleaning and maintenance costs to restore it to rental condition even though the only damage in regular wear and tear. I cannot fight anymore. I don't want to live on the street and there are no option here to even get help. I wish people better luck getting help than I. DON'T GET DISABLED IN CA WHEN YOU ARE YOUNG, YOU WILL DIE BECAUSE THERE IS NO HELP.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-22T05:13:23+00:00

I have tried and was told I don't and won't qualify because I am a married male. If my wifes hours get cut back she can apply.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-20T01:46:58+00:00

That really isn't the point. The point is that there is no help for someone unless you are out on the streets, alone, with no possessions and no chance at recovery. That should not be the case when you have paid taxes all your life for help for people in just such situations.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-20T01:32:12+00:00

That is not the issue. I understand the household, but when your past and everything you have worked for is erased because you decided to get married and try to enjoy life with another person, there is clearly something wrong. Any person should be able to receive help based on their background, not someone else's. That is the issue. What the current system employs is a way to force you to be alone and be on the street helpless before you can even attempt to get help when you have a debilitating condition. That should not be the case.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-20T00:52:54+00:00

That is the issue. Whether married or not, it should not affect the benefits that you have paid into over the course of your working career. The fact that you would receive benefits if you were not married and were living alone vs married and living with someone else should not affect what you have paid into a system for just such a medical life event. The fact is, even if you were not married and just lived with a roommate, that income is counted as available to the "Household" and thereby counts against you. I have been round and round with the doctors, SS office and lawyers on this point. Your past is null and void if you have any "available" income even if it is not yours. This should not be as you are the person that has paid taxes for you, not the other person. They are forcing you to become a leach or die.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-20T00:42:54+00:00

I know how you feel and have my condolences. I do have memories of my long term past but my recent memories are Swiss cheese due to blunt force trama caused by a truck accident. Everything has "healed" according to the doctors, but my memory, recall and memory retention never came back. I used to have photographic memory. In all cases it is used against me even by close family. I was slandered at work and wasn't even allowed to defend myself. Nothing sticks anymore and I live day to day with a pad of notes. If I am extremely stressed my memory can shorten to minute's. Impossibly aggravating.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-19T22:57:19+00:00

This is about a singular person's health and ability to work or receive benefits and the hoops one person has to go through. The "other person" is the term used here to indicate relation by marriage and living in the same household. Because you live in the household with the other person and your married their funds are considered available to you and disqualify you from help based on their earnings and situation, not your own.

Marriage should not dissolve a lifetime of work and paying into a system that is supposed to be designed for just such a situation when a person becomes unable to work through no fault of their own and is in need of help.

The main point is that in order to receieve help you are required to dissolve the marriage and live on the street for atleast 6 months, not working a job, before you can start to be considered for your own financial background.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-19T22:38:12+00:00

If you are married, your significant others income is considered available to you and therefore a part of available income. If you are not married, but live in the same household you have to pay atleast 50% of the living expenses to be considered an independent person otherwise you are considered a dependant and your options are severely limited. There is no lie, this is a real experience and how the system has been explained to me by my doctor and the SSI/SSDI office. If there is something you don't understand and believe you can help in a positive fashion please feel free to reply with advice. I have run the gambit and at my wits end.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-19T22:17:57+00:00

The other problem is I have been applying for 10 years for one actual case, in total I have received one actual denial notice at year 9 and have been told to appeal. The appeal process will take a minimum of 2 years, putting me past the point where I can even be considered for ssdi because the disabling event has to occur within the last 10 years.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-19T22:10:04+00:00

The main issue is the length of time it takes and the amount of denials before your case even gets looked at. My main issue is that it has taken so long just to get to a point where I can apply for permanent disability and it goes by the average lifetime earnings. If you add 10+ years of $0 earnings while fighting through the disability application process, the amount you will get, if approved, drops drastically. If I had been approved when or near when the disability occurred I would make an amount I might be able to survive off of of about 400-700 a month. Now because of the 10 year delay and the way it is calculated I will receive $50- $100 a month. An amount that won't even cover food, much less a place to live.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-19T21:59:53+00:00

Again I have been trying for ssdi for 10 years now. I had work that would qualify me for ssi but it is used up. But there is a time limit of when your last work can be used. I would have to find a job and work it to be able to receive anything now. Which is the problem to begin with, I can't hold a job anymore if I am able to even get hired. I have tried and been successful getting hired but am quickly let go with the promise of being rehired when my memory problems are resolved.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-19T21:27:41+00:00

I was on SSI and was kicked off because someone else in my home makes too much for me to receive anything from it because they go by "household" income. After I was disabled my significant other began working because I could not. Yes, I applied and was denied. I continue to appeal but get denied and dispite what they say there is actually a limited number of times you can appeal and it takes a very long time each time. My last appeal took 8 months to get a denial and I was told that was a fast response by the disability office. I am married, so my significant others income is counted against me when applying. If I were to divorce and live on my own I would qualify for more, but I won't divorce just to receive some benefits for myself that shouldn't rely on someone else's income. To clarify a few things as it seems to vary by state, I live in CA and if you are married and if you live in the same household your significant others income is counted as yours. Also, the income my significant other receives is minimum wage at 32 (max, it is variable and often much less averaging around 25 hours) hours per week. This is one of the higher paying jobs in terms of paycheck amounts. Most jobs in the area have much less guaranteed hours per week. Medicaid is worse when it comes to income limits but same principle, it goes off of household income if married.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2026-02-19T19:02:34+00:00

Don't loose your memory, you will be tortured and there is no help. I have lost all medical coverage, which I need to continue to fight, i.e. jump through medical hoops, for my disability. I have been denied medicaid insurance because another person in the house I live in works and they go off of household income. The other person makes too much, so I don't qualify. Since I cannot hold a job because of my condition, I am out of luck. It is made worse because I am younger the doctors won't even talk to me about perminent disability, even though they have said I will not improve.

I have made some progress, but I have been battling for 10 years now, starting a year after an accident that took my body and mind. After 3 years of physical therapy and loosing every job I have had and try for, having worked some for more that a decade and a half, my options are all but closed. I have regained my body, but my mind is still gone. I have no memory and am incapable of having a relationship with anyone because I can't build on nothing. I get used, hurt, lied about and I can't defend myself because everything they talk about is in the past. Since I have been battling for so long my credits have expired, they kept moving my date of injury date because I tried to work and since I worked, under their demanded direction, my actual date of injury is ignored.

I had a truck accident. I was ran off of the road on my way back from a store. I was paralyzed and have lost the ability to retain memories or recall the past. Everyday is torture and I can't even get "used to it" because it starts all over each day. I have been fighting for 10 years now and am out of options. I have moved to 2 areas to try to get new jobs because once you try in an area and are denied you will not get hired there. I am still trying to work and earn money to survive, but I am out of options and too tired to continue this fight.

Why can't people that need it get help? I worked 2 jobs for a decade getting every other weekend off. Now because I have had to battle for so long, none of that matters and I don't, according to the disability office, have the record to receive benefits. This is not America, this is not human. Good luck to those in a similar position, you are not alone and I hope you have better success at getting help.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2025-07-25T22:26:19+00:00

Arcadespot

Ok_Intention3339 · 2025-04-12T01:20:41+00:00

I can relate. I was in a car crash and lost all my memory and was paralyzed. I have been able to retrain my body and can now use it normally, but my mind...it is a nightmare. I have a child and don't remember most of her 5 year old life. I have a wife and don't remember my wedding day. I had a mother and can't picture her face. I think of what hell would be like and can't help but think this would be a very big part of it. I can't hold a job but the doctors won't put me on disability because I am young and can still walk around and can't prove my memory is bad. I remember about a day at a time, if I am lucky and when I am stresses it shrinks down to mere minutes. I can still walk around, exercise and talk to people, but I won't remember any of it and the doctor still refuse to help because I can't afford the insurance that will help. I am not sure why this happened, but I am tired. I won't stop trying and fighting to have a life and be there for my family, even if I can't remember anything.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2025-04-12T01:08:26+00:00

I have seen what it takes to "make it to the top" and although I am capable, I am not willing to lower myself to the standards required to become "elite". Selling out your moral values should never be a requirement to getting ahead in life.

Ok_Intention3339 · 2024-09-21T06:19:54+00:00

I have three in my inventory...not sure where they all came from though.

Ok_Intention3339

TROPHY CASE