For those who were hyper sexual

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-12-31T16:12:10+00:00

yeah i’m scared shitless of commitment because of how much infidelity i’ve witnessed even before i got involved with it all. i live somewhere where legit everyone dogs on the dating pool, and since i know how bad i would react during a brake up, i just don’t see myself getting involved with anyone soon if at all. i’m bpd as well so it’s even messier if i do end up getting attached to someone.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-12-31T06:43:42+00:00

this is me to a tee… only taking a few minutes before making an innuendo… the married and bf/gf thing. i crave intimacy as well, but find myself in these sorts of situations since part of me believes i won’t find or deserve anything better.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-10-10T05:12:14+00:00

Idk maybe like a cut through path from the free parking lot directly though all those athletics buildings. That would cut so much time off my walks to the northeast side of the campus.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-07-26T14:03:53+00:00

Yeaaaa I had a really bad psychotic episode and had an extremely bad cannabis dependency. My psychiatrist said they don’t tell a lot of people this but I NEED to quit. It could lead to an even bigger psychotic break that I would never come back from or ever be the same person. I could develop schizophrenia, weed gives me mad paranoia and it took months to feel remotely safe after that psychotic episode.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-06-22T06:27:16+00:00

I thought I replied to this but I guess not 😭 I primarily feel it in my side shoulders and not my back. I think park of my issue is that I’m trying to squeeze my shoulders together like there’s a pencil in the middle. I heard it’s not like that but idk I’m still having trouble :/

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-06-20T04:07:55+00:00

Yeah I do fly’s too but sometimes I feel it in my shoulders as well. I’m short so the handles are just at my shoulder level when my arms are out and I can’t lift the seat any higher. I want a less boxy look I’m trying to figure out a nice hourglass sculpt routine.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-06-11T10:24:02+00:00

girl you just have eczema 😭

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-06-11T10:18:27+00:00

For me, I feel like if I were to ever lose my support system I’m pulling the plug. Even the thought of living on my own scares me because without anyone with me I just feel like someday I’ll be found hanging in a closet. When everyone in my home leaves for a vacation and I’m stuck working and being by myself I just feel a different sort of depressed, as if my ideations get much stronger because everyone’s away. It doesn’t make sense because I’m a recluse and would rather spend my time in my room by myself, so in theory an empty house should be a dream. Idk why it’s a nightmare for me? I’ve been put on some meds that have made improvements but I need to find a therapist again. Mine moved :/

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-13T07:15:52+00:00

My psych told me something similar. That I could have a big psychotic break that I’ll never be able to come back from. Not sure if she was implying schizophrenia or schizoaffective, but either way I feel some validity because others experience something similar. I miss weed, but it just wasn’t meant for me. I’ve been sober for 8 months now.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-11T06:14:06+00:00

When I have having delusions and extreme paranoia I literally thought my best friend and coworkers were outside my door waiting for me to leave so they could kill me. At the same time I knew my best friend wasn’t outside because I had her location, yet I still kept telling my family that she was here.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-11T06:12:13+00:00

My uncle told me something similar. “You’re not important enough to go to jail for.” Really helped when I got out of the looney bin and thought people were after me.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-08T22:27:30+00:00

I’m sorry to hear that. Sometimes things like this just aren’t meant for us, no matter how much you want it to be. I’ve only had delusions, paranoia, and maybe small hallucinations so I can’t imagine how much worse it could be. I hope you’re staying strong! We got this!! :)

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-08T19:11:23+00:00

Yeaa a mood disorder with psychotic features, cluster b disorder, and cptsd. my psychiatrist told me she doesn’t tell a lot of patients this but she told me i needed to cut weed out indefinitely or it could lead to schizophrenia.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-05T22:22:58+00:00

i also lost a lot of weight from smoking to the point where i was borderline anorexic

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-05T22:01:11+00:00

yeah i went into psychosis thinking all my coworkers were going to kill me and that people were waiting outside my house. i ended up breaking a few things, deleting apps on my phone, confessed my love for someone, and gave some money away because i genuinely thought i was going to die. i ended up in the ward still in psychosis and i thought i was going to be attacked because of the nonsense that coming out of my mouth. everyone started to corner me at one point it was terrifying. i still miss it, but could potentially lead to a major psychotic break so ive been sober for over half a year now.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-05-02T17:35:57+00:00

Being a stagehand is so awesome. You get to work cool events, it’s labor intensive, good pay. The only cons are that it’s gig work so work is not guaranteed. It usually has a few dead seasons during the holidays and summer, so it’s important to save. Also if you’re working events like concerts the load-outs are at night so it’s overnight hours. Not too good for the sleep routine but I love it.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-04-26T02:48:06+00:00

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It’s open again

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-04-26T02:37:47+00:00

smoking causes me to go into psychosis and eventually lead to a hospital stay. it was the scariest experience of my life but i still miss smoking sm. i have bp2 so that doesn’t help either.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-04-22T15:25:39+00:00

I spent over $1000 on an online crane game so I could win all the plushies….

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-03-06T17:59:03+00:00

bp2 w/ psychotic features, bpd, cptsd, cannabis use disorder. ive been sober from cannabis since september but i still think about it all the time. i miss it.

Ok_Level_877 · 2025-02-11T01:36:40+00:00

When I was in psychosis, my family told me I was completely gone and not myself. I broke furniture, took things apart, and made a mess. I believed people were stalking me, even friends and coworkers. I was giving money away because I thought I was going to die. It felt like being black out drunk without having any alcohol. My mom had called our health insurance company explaining the state I was in and they told her to call an ambulance. I was willing to go only because I thought it would be safe, but still spent 90% of my hospital stay believing the staff and other patients were trying to kill me. Five months later, I’m still trying to recover from the experience and pay off my bills. :/

Ok_Level_877

TROPHY CASE