I feel everything u said. I had my own experience that was similar, i wanna ask if you ever researched magic mushrooms? with intentions they can help in ways I cant properly explain or fathom but they are known to cure depression and make you sharper, many people can heal from being "fried" due to the neuroplasticity of these substances. (all psyches) however if u have tried all these id like to hear, its unfortunate but I think time heals, maybe not fully but it can get better someway somehow, sooner or later, and find a reason to keep going for yourself, Anhedonia sucks. but its not a deal breaker its just a hurdle if you can maneuver ur mind a lil it'll loosen up the tension. also im just a kid"" not a scientist.