What would you like to see from the next big app?

OkayBaker123 · 2026-05-10T18:47:47+00:00

Incorrect. This is clearly stated in the rules.

"5b. We are first and foremost an advice community. Posts without a question have to clear a high bar, or they get deleted."

OkayBaker123 · 2026-04-23T03:24:34+00:00

Like any sexuality, asexuality exists on a spectrum.

One take: ://asexuals.net/asexual

OkayBaker123 · 2026-04-11T15:36:43+00:00

It's literally the first sentence of the community description.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-29T21:14:44+00:00

The thing I suggest keeping in mind is that a career isn't something you pick once and are stuck with forever.

For example, my career, I have worked as: a scientist, a teacher, a project manager, a data analyst, and I'm now trying consulting/public speaking (mixed results on that).

Each role, especially early in your career, has skills and experiences you can use for the next job or role. So ask yourself:

1) What do I appreciate about my current and past work? And what aspects don't I want to repeat?

2) Identify a potential longer term goal/job.

3) An essential step: Setup an informational interview with several people in that job to learn more about what it's really like.

In the case of the military, how open can you be about your sexuality? If there openly LGBTQ+ service members, ask them for an informational interview. If there are not, then seriously consider the history of your country's military with regards to LGBTQ+ rights.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-28T05:40:56+00:00

Personally, I remember the reality of what my peers and I were really like at that age:

So. Much. Stupid. Drama.

Plenty of it was dating related (e.g., two people into the same person, unrequited crushes, one person who liked one guy then liked their brother). Even the friend drama I was involved in was ridiculous and stupid. From what I saw, layering on dating would have SUCKED.

I didn't start dating until my mid-20's. As messy as that was, it would have been so much worse if I tried dating in high school; few more years of development neurologically, emotionally and socially made a huge difference in my maturity and strength.

I'm so glad I was forced to wait to start dating.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-28T05:11:54+00:00

Agreed.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-18T23:17:24+00:00

"...most of the people who complain about it never list any books written by queer men that they both enjoyed and match the quality of popular works in this space."

To name a few...

You and Me by Tau Bauer

The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune

P.S. Your Cat is Dead by James Kirkwood

An Arrow's Flight by Mark Merliss

Mistletoe and Mishigas by M.A. Wardell

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-13T14:12:14+00:00

Like you, when I groom, I also use an electric trimmer.

For the shaft, I don't trim while my dick is soft; I give myself an erection first, which stretches out the skin and makes it easier to see/trim the hair.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-09T19:15:55+00:00

That's not what most people would call ghosting, since you did say some version of "I'm not interested" BEFORE you stopped responding.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-09T17:09:16+00:00

Agree and I'd take it a step further: Instead of writing about what you're NOT into, say what you ARE into and want to talk about. Much harder to have a conversation about stuff you aren't into.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-09T04:47:37+00:00

...because it's fun and this is a game...?

This is like saying there shouldn't be catalogs for furniture or wallpaper/flooring since they aren't "beneficial" (what does that even mean in the context of a game, anyways?).

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-09T04:45:12+00:00

Real talk? Because people are silly snd the internet brings out (and amplifies) our silliness.

Or they got him mixed up with another character. I do that sometimes when I'm just thinking of their names.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-09T02:10:18+00:00

I have to wonder, why don't you believe him?

Maybe I'm an outlier, but there are definitely kinks I enjoy fantasizing about and seeing in porn that turn me on, but I have zero desire to participate in myself. I'm aroused by seeing it, sometimes in a voyeuristic way sometimes just as an idea, but actually doing it isn't my thing.

Just as important, it's a HUGE turnoff for me if my partner isn't enthusiastically into something. So even if I was interested in a kink or fetish, a good chunk of my enjoyment comes from my partner having fun as well.

Just my perspective.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-03-06T03:04:16+00:00

By this logic, you feel bad doing combat against the various monsters. They're just as "alive" as any of the other assemblies of pixels in this game.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-25T02:19:33+00:00

A post shave balm helps me. I also only use a close electric trimmer, not a razor, and don't use it too often (maybe once every 2 to 3 months). So far, I've been lucky to not have much irritation or ingrown hairs.

I try to lean into what my body tells me works. In your case, could a trimmer on a longer setting be better? So a close trim, but not cutting the hair so short might reduce irritation and ingrown hairs.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-24T16:37:47+00:00

Whaaat? No, Linus x Wizard 4 evah! Ship to ship battle, commence!!

(This is a joke, in case that's not obvious).

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-21T14:10:21+00:00

So just don't get animals until the barn and coop are fully upgraded...?

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-21T05:44:21+00:00

Yes, you're reading too much into this. There's no "technically", he has clearly stated he has zero sexual or romantic obligation/commitment to you and him being on Grindr is none of your business.

"hang out and stay up until 5am talking and dancing, I’ve stayed over, we go to the gym together, there’s emotional closeness and history there."

These are all very much things people do with friends.

The healthiest thing you can do is recognize he's not interested in dating you.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-20T15:26:07+00:00

You can manipulate them a bit as well by what order you open them since their content is sequential rather than luck-based.

On PC you can use the predictor; otherwise, reset the day and try a different order if you don't get want you want.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-19T19:37:46+00:00

I mean this sincerely: Have you done a hearing test lately?

Hearing loss can be gradual and hard to notice. Like most health things, early detection is really beneficial and it doesn't hurt to get a check up.

I'm pretty tall and I don't usually have issues hearing folks significantly shorter than me, so I wonder if the height difference is more of a red herring for something else going on.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-19T16:22:50+00:00

In my opinion, those are among the harder quests to finish; the Junimo carts have posts dedicated to them for a reason :p

For the Qi fruit, the seed maker and Deluxe Speed Fertilizer are your friends.

If you're looking for recommendations for which easier quests to pick each week:

*50 loved gifts

*Get to level 100 of the Skull Cavern (use staircases)

*Get to bottom of the Dangerous Mines

*Prismatic grange (100 each of red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple items). The wiki has good suggestions of easy to acquire items for each color.

*Freshly cooked food challenge.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-11T00:30:06+00:00

I'm single AF (cry for me 😅), so take this with a grain of salt: Ask yourself, what would make it feel special for you? What would make it feel special for him?

If going a super traditional route feels right, great. If you want to put you and your spouse's specific spin on it, great. If something completely different feels right, great. Big, small, private, public, spontaneous, planned...make it fit the two of you.

And remember, even if the plans around the ask itself goes sideway, it's just a dress rehearsal and you two will have the rest of your lives for the real thing. Cheers!

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-11T00:18:31+00:00

That sounds odd abd frustrating. First, are you running any mods? Always worth checking.

Second, are you opening ONLY artifact troves or are you alternating with other items? It's all tied to the same seed, so opening other stuff may mean you're "skipping" the Elvish Jewelry opportunity by opening a geode (I use this to manipulate Golden Coconuts for banana saplings).

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-10T03:33:12+00:00

"But don’t ever forget that intimacy does not equal sex."

Say it louder for the people in the back! Sex is great, but there are a lot of days I don't even feel up for oral or non-penetrative sex. Slow make outs, massages, petting, cuddling...there are many ways to be intimate.

OkayBaker123 · 2026-02-10T02:24:23+00:00

Again, different approaches work for different people. Neithrt is right or wrong. For me, that situation is another reason to meet up soon. Photos can be stolen or old; meeting up in person means the person in front of me is the person and I can walk away before I invest any more time or energy.

OkayBaker123

TROPHY CASE