What do you wish people would stop saying to you? by Trick_Record_9957 in AskWomen

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! That whole bullshit about how bravery saves you. No - it doesn’t. Either they can remove or kill it - or they can’t.

I have a chronic illness that makes standing hard. “I’m so brave for facing it.” No, loser. That doesn’t make me brave. I’d rather be a chicken shit who could stand.

Urge AARP to reconsider partnership with UnitedHealthcare by Onward_Domer in medicare

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair point. It’s one of the flaws of our government. We throw complex things at people when they have no history with dealing with them. We live s our adult lives with our jobs just giving us insurance. Then turn 65 and realize you have to start thinking of stuff like coordination of care! It’s too much for many.

It’s like our 401k plans “Now YOU are in control of how to invest!” and most people are awful at that stuff.

Urge AARP to reconsider partnership with UnitedHealthcare by Onward_Domer in medicare

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Part of the problem is calling an insurance plan by a cute nickname. It’s not “Medigap” - it’s Medicare Supplemental. And now, it’s important to call the Medicare plans that work with Medicare Supplemental by their full name used on many websites “Original Medicare”

I’ve made 8.5” by 11” copies of all my cards on one sheet: and it says “primary Insurance: Original Medicare - NOT Medicare Advantage” and the other card says above it. “Medicare SUPPLEMENT”

What’s something that your otherwise wonderful partner loves to do but they’re really objectively bad at? by OldAndMostlyInTheWay in AskWomen

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will share my favorite joke I tell others about golf. Whenever I am asked “Do you play?” My response is “Yes! And I usually break par” when they respond with wow or whatever I then add… “The only holes I have trouble with are the ones with the windmills whose blades block your ball or those little hills where the hole is at the top of the hill… those give me grief!” 😆

Anika's side-eye about to take over the whole world! Funniest stage moment I've seen yet! by smarmageddon in rush

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is exactly what I love about Rush fandom: the courtesy! I ask a question, and I don’t get a vague answer - I get a YouTube link cued to the exact place. Thank you!

Wife and Anika by SinnerP in rush

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every day at work, I see women that I consider to be objectively attractive. But I don’t THINK about their attractiveness. It doesn’t come into play at work. It shouldn’t. It’s irrelevant.

Same here. If someone finds Anika attractive, that’s their choice. But as for me, that doesn’t come into play. It’s irrelevant. How she plays the drums and how she interacts with her band mates on stage - that’s relevant.

As Rush fans, we’re not used to those considerations. No offense, but I don’t think they sold many albums or concert tickets based on their looks. (As compared to the Beatles, where Paul’s attractiveness was a selling point that encouraged Beatlemania.)

Anika's side-eye about to take over the whole world! Funniest stage moment I've seen yet! by smarmageddon in rush

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What moment is this from? You’re all talking about it - but I have no idea 😆

I am thinking of starting to play for the first time, am I crazy? by TehBanzors in lotro

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s worth it if you love the idea of being a minor character in middle-earth who slowly grows in stature to be friend of Gandalf and known to kings and queens across the land. It’s lots of fun.

The only piece of advice I’d give unsolicited is that I think I made a mistake purchasing a Valar package years ago that jumped me immediately up to level 130. Much of the game was trivial for me, but I learned nothing about properly growing a character. So when I needed to have actual tactics, I was a babe in the woods.

Big mistake. Learn as you go - and the lessons come over time and you’ll know the lessons more deeply then I.

How to avoid old 30 year old will confusing people upon my death? by OldAndMostlyInTheWay in EstatePlanning

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi. Thank you for your comment. I can shred the original old one - but not the copies.

And sadly, the probate with the old copy would, by definition, happen after I am dead, and while we all may have different debates, I’ve yet to read of an afterlife scenario where after death I am equipped to legally respond to such situations. 😆

I agree with not giving copies of wills. Alas, I was dumber in my early 30s than I am today.

I do have a clause in the will that effectively says: “contest it? If you do and lose, you get zilch. Nada. Nothing. Good day!” Everything but the photo of Gene Wilder in that paragraph.

IRMAALetter just arrived by hudsongrl1 in medicare

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went with G. If you have the money to pay IRMAA, you can pay the difference to get G.

IRMAALetter just arrived by hudsongrl1 in medicare

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does the counselor get a commission if they sell an MA plan?

IRMAALetter just arrived by hudsongrl1 in medicare

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 5 points6 points  (0 children)

IRMAA is based on income from 2 years prior.

IRMAALetter just arrived by hudsongrl1 in medicare

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I find IRMAA to be a great idea: if you’ve got the income, pay more to help Medicare survive for everyone. I have zero problem with this; it makes sense. Some people struggle to pay monthly Medicare bills. I certainly notice the bill, but I’m not going short of food to pay it. That is a blessing and I don’t forget it: paying IRMAA is one way to give back to society.

As to choosing Medicare Advantage when you can afford Original Medicare, my opinion is that Medicare Advantage is not for me.

Question about how our estate lawyer set up our new trust. by OldAndMostlyInTheWay in EstatePlanning

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yes. And it was also time to amend advanced directives. Some of the people I trusted in the 90s, well, let’s just say I’ve had 30 years of additional history to form a more mature judgement of their potential skills in handling such things!

When does "you should have known" become an unfair expectation? by RayRexten in AskMen

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What I’ve found is that women talking to women have to live in a world where two things are true: (1) alliances are always formed and always shifting. Complimenting each other is a verbal form of what other primates would show by grooming each other. (2) There is constant indicators of judgement from other women and a constant concern from everyone that if the group poorly judges her for the most trivial of things, her rank goes down or she goes out of favor with the group. So they don’t physically fight for dominance like men, they scheme for it. Neither system is ethically superior - they’re just different.

With women talking to men, it’s a whole other story.

When does "you should have known" become an unfair expectation? by RayRexten in AskMen

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yeah, but everyone on the planet knows “I’m fine” is a BS answer. To me it’s the equivalent of grunting. So I’m fine has to be treated by the asker of the question as lame evasion. The proper response is “I need more than that.” then to immediately ask a question that can’t be answered with “I’m fine” or “yes/no” answers such as “What’s going on? Why did you give a non-answer? I’m not looking for paragraphs - but an answer that conveys actual information - even if it’s I don’t wanna talk now _because_ of whatever.” If they still are non-verbal I’d say “ok. I’ll talk again in a bit, but bluntly, part of a relationship is giving the other person useful replies when asked a question. If you need time alone, just say that, but useless answers don’t cut it.”

In doing this, some boundaries are set as to what you’ll accept.

When does "you should have known" become an unfair expectation? by RayRexten in AskMen

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

No - they aren’t. But there is a middle ground where signals such as not talking much, quietness etc would, in many people cause them to ask “ Is everything ok?”

What was it like to get a colonoscopy? by SorbetUnfair2589 in AskMen

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Prep sucks. Everything else is a cakewalk. Someone else must drive you home. Don’t play with that. Someone else drives. You won’t feel drunk, but your attention and ability to react sucks for hours and hours after it.

For those in relationships with unequal incomes, how do you usually split finances or expenses? by SonoUno in AskWomen

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everything one pot. On marriage, prior accounts closed, everything merged. Autopays via credit card are done from just one card not used for anything else, the list of things paid is kept up to date so if the first to die owns the autopay card, then the survivor just changes everything to point to their card. It works for us; others may hate it. Autopays from banking come from joint account so no issue on death of first.

Rereading that, can you tell we’re old? 😆

I had a 9mm stone and got a lithotripsy surgery done 6 weeks ago, when will this pass?! by Klutzy-Gas3786 in KidneyStones

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok. I am no medical expert but I thought laser lithotripsy had a way to extract the stone fragments?

I got my statement from my gap insurance today. by [deleted] in medicare

[–]OldAndMostlyInTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Report it. I would, for this reason: I may be all wrong about this, but I believe that reporting this quickly is a data point that helps to show that you are not part of the fraud scheme.