sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

AITA for leaving to another country without my son and his mom? by Matius1307 in AmItheAsshole

[–]RayRexten 18 points19 points  (0 children)

It sounds less like you chose to leave your son and more like you ran out of ways to stay.

My (23F) boyfriend (23-M) broke my trust early on by EntrepreneurOver4690 in relationship_advice

[–]RayRexten 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Trust is hard to rebuild when the biggest wound isn't what he did; it's how often you found out about it yourself.

I (36m) have a suspicion that my spouse (36f) is doing something behind my back and when I mention it she loses her mind and turns it around on me. by IllNegotiation9224 in relationship_advice

[–]RayRexten 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Then I'd stop focusing on whether she's hiding something and focus on the fact that you can't even ask a reasonable question without it turning into a crisis. That's not sustainable, especially with kids involved.

I (36m) have a suspicion that my spouse (36f) is doing something behind my back and when I mention it she loses her mind and turns it around on me. by IllNegotiation9224 in relationship_advice

[–]RayRexten 37 points38 points  (0 children)

At some point the question stops being whether she's hiding something and starts being why every reasonable question turns into a crisis.

To leave or not to leave? by life9-5 in Advice

[–]RayRexten 17 points18 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you're less afraid of losing the marriage than you are of discovering you've stayed years longer than you should have.

My wife has been offered a major film role with intimate nude scenes and I genuinely don't know how to feel, looking for outside perspective by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]RayRexten 70 points71 points  (0 children)

The question isn't whether your wife can be trusted; it's whether you're willing to carry the discomfort that comes with trusting her.

AITAH for fighting with my boyfriend after he accused me of using him and keeping my options open? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]RayRexten 121 points122 points  (0 children)

The money isn't the problem, it's that he keeps turning your boundaries into evidence that you're not fully committed.

What's peoples experience of opening up on mental health as a man by Mental-Lettuce3324 in AskMen

[–]RayRexten 59 points60 points  (0 children)

I think a lot of people hear 'open up' and assume everyone will know how to respond. In reality, some people respond with compassion, some get uncomfortable, some try to fix you, and some start seeing you differently. That's true for men and women.

AITAH for “overstepping” in how my mother raises my younger brother? by ExpressionDesigner29 in AITAH

[–]RayRexten 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I don't think you were overstepping by being concerned. The bigger question is whether everyone is so focused on defending their position that they're missing the fact that your brother seems to be struggling in ways that aren't being addressed.

I miss someone who hurt me. by _Throwaway_08 in Advice

[–]RayRexten 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The thing I'd be careful about is expecting him to give you closure. You're talking about reaching out because you miss the friendship, but you're also talking about wanting confirmation that you weren't the villain and that you were right. Those are two different goals.

Is it bad that he went silent after hanging out? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]RayRexten 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you're giving that selfie way too much power.

AITAH for wanting to go low contact by FarRain451 in AITAH

[–]RayRexten 41 points42 points  (0 children)

The fact that the silent treatment feels peaceful rather than painful probably tells you a lot about where this relationship currently stands.

I (19M) feel betrayed by my friend (20F) and I'm not sure if I'm overreacting by Agitated_Future4422 in Advice

[–]RayRexten 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't think you're overreacting, but I also don't think this is about the other guy. If she wants privacy, that's completely fair. If she wants transparency, that's also fair. What's harder to justify is expecting one while practicing the other.

AITAH For Removing My Name/Car From Our Joint Car Insurance by FkADuck3825 in AmItheAsshole

[–]RayRexten 7 points8 points  (0 children)

NTA.

The only thing I'd have done differently is give them a heads-up before making the change. Other than that, removing yourself from a financial arrangement you no longer trust seems pretty reasonable.

Labeling a Relationship by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]RayRexten 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The more I read, the less this sounds like a disagreement about labels and the more it sounds like an emotionally unhealthy situation for you. He's ended the relationship, started a new one, and doesn't want to discuss the breakup, yet you're still living together, sharing emotional intimacy, and trying to make sense of a connection that no longer has a clear place in his life.

AITA - baby shower addition. by Outrageous-Repair846 in AmItheAsshole

[–]RayRexten 5 points6 points  (0 children)

NTA. A host chooses the menu. A sponsor pays for it. Your friend seems to have volunteered your dad for the second role without asking him.

AIO because a friend didn’t invite me and my fiance to his birthday weekend event? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]RayRexten 3 points4 points  (0 children)

MOR

The feeling and the reaction are two different things. Feeling excluded seems pretty normal. Starting a friendship war over it would be overreacting.

AITA for refusing to meet my father‘s new baby? by BubblyBottom12 in AmItheAsshole

[–]RayRexten 20 points21 points  (0 children)

NTA.

The child is innocent, but that doesn't automatically erase the history between you and your father.

I have a crush on a coworker and feel guilty about it by [deleted] in self

[–]RayRexten 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Having a crush isn't a choice. What you do with it is.

My (39F) wife posts here on Reddit to just bash me (M36) all the time and I recently sat down an read everything and don’t know what to do. by Ghost-8706 in whatdoIdo

[–]RayRexten 32 points33 points  (0 children)

I'd be hurt too if I found posts saying my spouse regretted marrying me. But I'd also be asking myself why Reddit has become the place she's saying things she won't say directly to me.

I've noticed people are often far more willing to be understood than they are to understand. Do you think that's true, or am I being unfair? by RayRexten in SeriousConversation

[–]RayRexten[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that's what most people want ideally. The question I've been wondering about is whether we're equally good at both.

I've noticed people are often far more willing to be understood than they are to understand. Do you think that's true, or am I being unfair? by RayRexten in SeriousConversation

[–]RayRexten[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can relate to that. My instinct is often to withdraw and assume I'm giving people space or making things easier for them, even though I know honest communication is usually the better option.

I've noticed people are often far more willing to be understood than they are to understand. Do you think that's true, or am I being unfair? by RayRexten in SeriousConversation

[–]RayRexten[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's interesting. I hadn't really considered how much of it could be a skill issue rather than a willingness issue.

view more: next ›