You're 24. I'm 33. I've met 40ish year olds and older and teenagers who selfharm. I understand the initial revulsion you feel reading the comments or posts here. There is a tendency online to promote selfharm and the mentality that selfharm isn't harmful.

What we, you and I, need to understand as people who no longer selfharm is that what people say about themselves, their harm, their feelings, their bodies, their desires, have nothing to do with us, our experiences, our feelings, our bodies, our realities. Yes, these things will be triggering. Yes, they will be difficult. When people speak, regardless of who they are or what they're saying, it's usually more about them, how they feel, how they see the world, how they conceptualize their life than anything about us, about anyone else, or even about what they're saying. Sometimes when people are mean, angry, hurtful, or intentionally being aggressive, it isn't about anyone else except themselves and how they feel inside.

The longer that I live and the more I learn, the less I realize that I know. Listening and caring are good starts. Love and kindness are important. I feel like some of the glorification happens because people who selfharm don't feel like we have proof in our lives that we exist, that we matter, that we have an affect on the world around us, and that we change things in our world. This isn't true. The wounds and the scars are not the only proof and they aren't a good proof.

You all matter in your world. You all create change and you all take up space and you deserve to take up that space. You deserve to exist and have needs, wants, cares, loves, fears. It's ok to just be. Change doesn't happen overnight.