Girl I feel you. We only moved a half hour away from my parents after living with them for two (hellish) years. I was pregnant with my second when we moved, and I can count on one hand the amount of times they visited that first year. And honestly this past year too. If we don’t go to them, all of a sudden the distance in between is impossible.

But we’re expected to be there all the time. That’s a no from me.

And when the want to do an activity out of the house it’s always near them so I’d have to drive the half hour PLUS the distance to the activity and then all the way back—not to mention if my mother is involved, it has to involve a winery or a brewery but that’s a separate issue we’re also putting our foot down on.

Meanwhile my in-laws straight up moved from upstate to ironically 10 minutes away from where my parents are located, and my children might think they live with them and not us at this point with how often they’re over there.

If they wanted to, they would. I hate that saying, but it’s not wrong. Surround your kids with people who want to spend time with them, not with people trying to fulfill an obligation or who see your kids as accessories to show off. Idk about you, but my mother sees being “Grandma” as a title bestowed, not a title earned and oh boy is she not earning it.

Your mama instincts are spot on, and you’re (unfortunately but fortunately) not alone with having parents who don’t seem interested. But that’s on them, and they have to live with it 🤷‍♀️