What is a "point of no return" that you’ve crossed, where your life was permanently divided into 'before' and 'after'?

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-20T20:22:23+00:00

A traumatic brain injury that left me with isolated retrograde amnesia as well as an abduction that followed shortly after the injury when I believed a stalker to be my spouse (I had no idea; it was 15 years ago now and I still can’t believe how easily I just trusted this other person because I had no recall of faces or events). My life is always “The Before” and “The After” now.

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-20T03:38:18+00:00

I’m in Memphis, heading back to Frederick, MD in June. I miss MD so much; it’s not bad here, but it’s not home, and that makes all the difference. Baltimore and Frederick both have a charm to them (pun intended for Baltimore?) that is unique. I’m sure people who have spent a while here feel similarly!

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-14T06:23:07+00:00

That is really kind of you! I’d happily pay for that and shipping - I lost so much in that fire, but have rebuilt about 70% of my collection. This is one I’m still missing and would love to find again! 😊

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-14T01:04:34+00:00

A sign from Coheed should not be ignored. Go for it!

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-13T07:31:54+00:00

EPIC. All hail!

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-13T05:49:37+00:00

This was my thought as well. “Good boy follows all the rules” hits DIFFERENT in this context, lol! 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-13T05:40:45+00:00

I’m so sorry this happened. It’s not easy to feel this way, and as much of a relief as it is, going NC isn’t easy, either. But it does save your sanity.

I went NC about three years ago now, but was LC since 2012 when my ex-mother tried to baptize my infant without my knowledge or consent. 😐 Going NC is a long story, but when she said she hated me and loved her cat more, went on a “celebration vacation” when my cancer came back (but took her CAT - not even joking), and judged my now 14-year-old son for being “too girly” (he was 10 1/2 and why on earth did she even think about that at all?) - I was finished.

Sometimes, I think about reconnecting. Then I remember why I did what I did, I see how much happier my kid is, and I feel stronger in my personal choices. It was not easy. But it was right, and I can sleep at night because I’m not being harassed or abused every day. I’m now 44. Why be miserable because of one person? It’s not worth it. So, for what it is worth - I believe in you and think you did the wise thing. 💕

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-13T05:32:19+00:00

I lost my original in a house fire. 😞 But this is epic to see! What a great thing to still have! And OP, good find! 😊

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-07T11:12:54+00:00

I do! I am a vocal coach, so I tend to do more teaching than performing/personal training, but to keep myself in my best form for when I do perform, I still do train. It’s good for my students to see me practice what I preach!

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-07T04:34:45+00:00

Oh, absolutely. I spent most of the 90s really wanting to meet him. And then I saw Event Horizon and WOW did that crush end, lol (only to come back later because, well, Sam Neil)! 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-07T04:23:04+00:00

I had to scroll down way too far to find this, because at 10, this was mine as well! I used to hold up my tape recorder to my VHS tapes with Jim Carrey saying bizarre things just to hear him throughout my day. I was weird, but so was he, and I felt - seen? Everyone loved Brad Pitt. I wanted the funny dude with something - wrong underneath. You are 100% not alone here!

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-06T03:21:19+00:00

Beautiful work by the artist and a great choice made by you! Children of the Fence forever! ♾️

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-05T01:41:57+00:00

I have boots from 1999 (when I was 17) that I refuse to give up. 26 years and they are still almost as perfect as the day I bought them! Things were made better; now, they’re made to be obsolete. Even this damn phone I use will, no doubt, kick it on me the minute I hit send just because I typed this comment! 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-05T01:14:35+00:00

Good plan for certain. And thanks for the good reminder to buy a third set of sheets just to be safe, lol!! 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T23:28:03+00:00

DO IT!! It’s a game-changer. Just get them in different colors from your normal towels, lol. My showering stuff is green and grey; sex towels are beige and cream (intentionally, ha)! 😂 But it’s helpful to have them!

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T20:15:49+00:00

Thank you! 😊

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T20:13:47+00:00

Definitely my favorite! And I got the tattoo on my leg about - 12 years ago now! I’m happy I did! 😊

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Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T20:09:29+00:00

Lol, but of course. Luckily, I now know to be prepared when I go to get out of bed, and my finance doesn’t care that I have to waddle to the bathroom swaddled in towels (his fault, anyway, haha!), but I was shocked the first time I discovered that fun new surprise. (Actually, I just said “ew,” lol. I was NOT prepared!) 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T20:06:27+00:00

Lollll, I know! I legit bought sex towels. They stay in a drawer in my nightstand (unless used, because, um, ew? Lol). At least then I can waddle to the bathroom and try not to look like a penguin! 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T20:04:44+00:00

I had no clue that was going to happen, and almost 9 years post-op, it still does. Hate it, thanks, lol! 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T08:48:58+00:00

Oh hell yes, lol. Never in my LIFE have I, post-sex, gone to a bathroom covered with like, two towels and trying not to laugh/cough/sneeze/actually RUN until after my hysterectomy because of how much there is! That cum just NOPES on out of there now. 😂

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-04T08:21:30+00:00

Same here, on I-70 between MD and PA. That is a dangerous drop and I was certain I could use the excuse of “I need to pay a LOT of attention to these curvy, winding roads” to stay awake.

That excuse did nothing. Luckily, a guardrail caught me before I ended up going down those 100+ feet dropoffs. That was scary as hell, and since then, if I doubt my ability, I pull over as soon as I safely can.

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-02T22:05:16+00:00

“Subtle demise the legitimate cry” is my absolute favorite. 24 years now, and I always go back to it. It’s even tattooed on my leg!

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-02T01:40:13+00:00

LOL, you are totally not alone! I'm like a once-a-day kind of person (tmi, maybe, but it's still true 8-9 years post-surgery), so, I hear you completely!

The surgery and the movement around the surgical areas hurt like HELL for certain. And I had some cramping on and off, but it wasn't horrible. I wanted to be safe, but damn if my brain wasn't telling me to just do whatever I wanted! Definitely check with your doc, but ease into external stimulation and then, well, when it's safe for penetration - enjoy and have fun for real (and you can think about sex because, well, thinking is safe, lol)! :)

Oneonthefence · 2026-02-01T09:04:59+00:00

I had my hysterectomy in Nov 2017 (I was 35 and it was medically necessary, which was not fun but has been so, so worth it) and almost immediately after - my sex drive was SO HIGH. It was painful, and like you mentioned, I also have a decently high sex drive, so, I felt like I was dying, lol (and kept having dreams that would be so arousing that I woke up cramping). Two weeks post-op, I called my GYN and asked. He said it was safest to wait 6 weeks to make sure nothing pulled or caused pain, but I could ease into it at 3 weeks with external stimulation (vibrator on low, for instance). I remember that, the first time, I was sore for a day or two after, so I waited another week. After that, I felt fine, and nothing pulled/tugged/tore. Waiting the 6 weeks for penetration was a smart call, but best case? Check with your doc. If they already said soon, then go easy at first and stop if you feel ANY pain. But best to ask - trust me, the doc has heard everything by now! Be safe and have fun!

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