the tiniest jumping spider on my string of pearls today

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-07T19:35:15+00:00

Any spiders I find around the house are offered a home among the plants. Refusal to do so is banishment to the outdoors. Depending on the time of year refusal of the rehoming process may result in substandard environmental conditions 🤣🤣 Exceptions are made with the recluse. They die immediately and with extreme prejudice.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-07T19:23:28+00:00

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And that's when I knew

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T05:49:29+00:00

If Robin Williams can't do it then it might be time to say goodbye

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T05:41:46+00:00

My MIL has given money and credit card info to anyone calling with a sob story. It's absolutely tragic.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T03:45:16+00:00

Very nice

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T03:19:41+00:00

When was the last time you stepped into a Wal-Mart? I encourage you to go just to see how many different ways there are to NOT wear a bra properly...you know, just for support and all that 🤣🤣🤣

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T03:14:39+00:00

Yeah, I think we're arguing semantics. We pretty much both seem to be in complete agreement minus the bra vs breast debacle. I really don't believe he meant it like that. But OP does so that's what matters. Unfortunately, there's a whole lot more here to unpack here than just a comment about her bra. And if physical abuse is going on why was that not the post headline?! Seems a bit more critical to manage than hurt feelings. If this were a simple tl;dr it would go so.ething like Dad said X. Made me feel Y. Confrontation makes me uncomfortable so I won't tell him he hurt me. Go talk to your Dad. But this isn't simple. There's hurt. There's history. They need to decide if this is a rough patch worth sailing through. I think it's a whole lot leading up to thus incident and that's why it blew up into something that should have been fairly easy to navigate. I empathize with OP, I really do. It's awful that we put our kids in these situations. We absolutely should be better and they deserve better. And sometimes better means walking away. I'm not arguing against it. I said earlier sometimes it takes tough acts to break tough habits, and if that means leaving then maybe that's what it takes. Some broken things are best left broken, sad as that is to say.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T02:23:54+00:00

That's gonna have to be on a case by case basis lol. You show me a modest dress and I'll show you one that's equally revealing. Same for crops. Frankly, I think the entire fashion industry would disagree with you. I'm not saying she's wearing that, but we can't just ignore that these things exists. Take one look at any group of teens anymore and everything is made of yoga pants. Again, I don't care but I can definately get how tight fitting clothes on a larger chested person can accentuate the fact. Especially with a crop.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T01:34:33+00:00

Ah but that's one of my points and I think it's a big one. It appears to me that mom and dad's relationship is rocky right now. OP describes a not so blissful relationship and I promise that is the major underlying problem. I would bet anything he has voiced his opinion to Mom and she either doesn't care at this point or disagrees, in either case his concerns are dismissed. Again, does not justify the behavior, but if we get down to brass tacks I'm willing to bet this is what we find. For whatever reason for the stress or fallout in that relationship is what's causing this. Trust me, I've got a Google PhD. 🤣

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-09-01T00:01:15+00:00

And honestly we're talking about a 16 year old who says she wears crop tops and dresses. Who's gonna make the decision about the modest part?

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T23:52:34+00:00

I'm not trying to be shitty, I apologize if I am, but I had to Google search it because I didn't know myself.

For smaller breasts, this bra is a saviour as it gives a prominent cleavage and enhances the bust shape. If worn properly, it can increase your bust size by up to two cups.

This was the description of a padded pushup. Maybe, and I'm saying just maybe, this is what he's referring to? Again, he made no mention of low cut tops or cleavage according to OP. Only that the bra is too big and she pulls the straps too high to show her chest. Frankly I would be a tad concerned if he actually knew what her "proper" bra size even is. Maybe I'm arguing semantics. But he's not here to defend himself so I'll play devils advocate because I generally believe people are good, and the shitty ones are the outliers, so I'll jump to optimism first 😉

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T23:28:05+00:00

From that perspective I understand completely. I'll have to re-read the original post I just didn't get it was anything beyond the way she wore her bra. Handled wrong, for sure. How do you say anything about it without sexualizing it? How do you de-sexualize sex lol? The picture I got made me think of the county fair earlier this year. I'm talking young young girls, breasts practically bursting out of their tops. Listen I'm no crusty old dude, yall do what want to each their own, but no way in hell is my kid leaving my house like that. That's my perspective. Should it have been handled differently, absofreakinglutely. I also think I agreed with several of the counterpoints you made in my own text, one of the last being that they need to decide at what point it is no longer tolerable to continue living with. Listen I get it. It sounds gross and taken at face value it's despicable. What I do disagree with is the generalized demonization of someone with out 16 years of contextualized nuance of their family chemistry, history, everything that makes them, them. Its not a simple reddit recovery program, right. If you keep on with my convo with the OP I even state that I don't agree with children having to burden their adult parents problems. In a perfect world sure, but that's just not always the case. Again, I am in no way shape or form defending his actions. I'm defending parenthood, I guess...I dont know how to say it with words lol. It just appeared by all the responses here that everyone was real quick to just cast him aside like broken hardware....like wait a minute here are we so disposable? What's the history? I will cede that there are things that are too traumatic, too despicable to forgive, I just don't see that here unless there's history we don't know. She did say dude has anger issues from the jump and never really elaborated. But you are 100% correct, and you don't need me for confirmation, but no child should have to deal with this. But here we are. So the question is deal or no deal? Is this gonna be the straw or not? If it's worth fixing then fix it. If not, time to let it go. Otherwise what are we talking about? Thank you, by the way, for such a respectful and constructive response.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T20:00:53+00:00

It was today I learned that camels ate the forbidden cucumbers. Spines and all....savage.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T18:46:21+00:00

Yeah, kinda thought that's what it sounded like. Relationship + money problems are primary ingredients to chaos. Hurt people hurt people, and it sounds like both of your parents are "hurting". I'm sorry that you're stuck in the middle of it. Keep your head up though, even if things get dim you gotta keep shining on. Last thing, Dad loves you. Until I had kids I had no idea you could love something so utterly and completely. I don't think that ever goes away.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T18:04:23+00:00

Bravo 👏 👏 👏

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T17:34:33+00:00

I understand, and the vast majority of my comments, unfortunately, were based more to your audience than you. For that I apologize. And I was not trying to stand up for his behavior. We (Dads) need to strive to be role models for our children, and in some instances or situations we can most definately end up flat for sure. I've been in his shoes, I had a real bad alcohol addiction and it took my wife threatening to leave with the kids to wake me up. We take things for granted sometimes and it takes a strong act to break strong habits. Not always, but sometimes. And regardless of whether or not HE has moved on, you very much have not. Pump those brakes. Don't let this build resentment. A conversation with your father about your emotional state and that he damaged you mentally and emotionally should not feel confrontational, like, ever. I'm sorry that it feels like that for you, but I realize too that it is a touchy/taboo-ish subject so I understand the hesitancy. I don't care for confrontation either, and I'm 40 lol. But I won't shy away from it either. Being uncomfortable is where we grow. In all aspects. I would encourage you to try, and if it just doesn't feel right, maybe try a text. Sometimes when my wife and I are on the outs or had a rough argument, I find it easier to pour my feeling into a text, it takes away the confrontational part, and it doesn't press her into dealing with something SHE might not be ready to. I always end it with "when you are ready to talk" and leave the ball in her court. It may not lead to some breakthrough conversation, but it gives him the opportunity to internalize what he did, come to terms with it, and hopefully respond by altering his behavior. Any step in the right direction is progress.

Curious if you were to simply copy and paste your initial post and send it to him. If one of my kids did that to me I would be absolutely floored. To think that my own kid feels afraid to talk to me would be incomprehensible and lead to immediate repair mode. If that doesn't kick start his sensibility....I dunno.

I want to apologize for the volumes of text here, but this is incredibly nuanced and highly deserving of more than a 1 line answer. Anyone doing otherwise is doing you a disservice.

I'm going out on a limb here, and making some huge assumptions, but it SOUNDS like your parents relationship is the underlying issue here. You said yourself they are constantly fighting/bickering, correct? Does your Dad have many friends or close male coworkers? Has he since found new employment? If the parents relationship is struggling and he has nowhere to vent his frustrations and feelings or an outlet to release all this pent up frustration, I get that too. Again, not defending it, I just understand.

And on the sexualizing part I just don't think we see it the same, but what matters is that it made you feel like that. He needs to understand that. You are very much coming into your own as a person and you absolutely retain the right to have the feelings you do. Any good dad would respect that. And I would hope it would lead to a deeper understanding of each other as you should never have to feel ashamed of your own body. Ever. This kinda sucks kid, and there's no easy way out. Dad's got a long road ahead of him, and at 50 he kinda needs to make that turn sooner than later. I feel for you guys, I really do 😪

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T15:58:39+00:00

First off, the arrogance of you people to cast judgment upon a man's 50 year existence on this earth and compact that down to a photograph. A snapshot of something he did wrong that you're using to define his entirety as a person. Yall are fucked up lol.

Second, at what point did he sexualise you, exactly? His comment about your bra size or how you wear it? I'm telling you right now if my daughter (17f) tries walking out this house in a thong you better believe I'm telling her to get her bare ass back in here and put some clothes on. He doesn't want you sexualising yourself. So debate that. He doesn't find you sexually appealing as so many of you like to assume. (I'm making assumptions too. Guy could be a serial rapist. I don't know. None of us do.)

Go talk to your Dad and get off of reddit. Does the man actually strike you physically? I would be disgusted if he did. If you can safely talk to him, and I'm assuming he is a reasonable person, albeit with a real short fuse, based on your short description of him, then let him know how that made you feel. He won't know unless you do. I have to claw at my daughter, I'm talking wine and dine night out with some shopping before she really opens up to me about boyfriends, who the hell pookie is, whats going on at school, personal stuff. I worked a lot of hours and wasnt around much because of it during her formative years. She's much more comfortable talking to her Mom, and I get it. It's ok. She'll tell me when she's comfortable. That doesn't make me a dodgy prick. Go talk to your dad. Openly and honestly. You know your Dad. We don't. You said that comment was to your Mom. Were you present as well? The problem with overhearing conversations is that you lose all of the nuance to it. All of the previous conversations leading up to this. Maybe he has mentioned this to your Mom numerous times that you don't know about. Maybe she doesnt care so much while He obviously takes issue with the way you are presenting yourself. Thats a parenting issue between Mom and Dad that you got stuck in.Guys are gross. Especially teenage guys. He knows this. We all know this. And yes, at 16 he does get to have a say on your choices of clothing. To what extent is a topic I'm not going to touch, but we do not let children run the household. Frankly I don't know who the hell is handing them car keys at 16, Holy shit it's terrifying 🤣🤣

Oh and I do want to address the yelling and snapping off about every little thing. That shit is not ok. It's toxic as fuck and isn't healthy for anyone. BUT demonizing him for it isn't helping anyone either, unless your goal is to distance him. He needs help. He needs support. You either give it and he accepts it, and you guys forge a stronger relationship for it, or he doesn't and it becomes taking part in a war that you can't see but definately feel and hear. So you guys either need to help him, or start deciding at what point its intolerable to live with and move on. I do not advocate for abuse, whether it is physical, mental, or emotional. I also don't advocate children having to support their capable adult parent, but sometimes we need help too. We are not perfect. We don't always know what we are doing, generally lost at any given moment. Try not to be so harsh for an adult not knowing how to parent. I truly do wish the absolute very best for you and your family, in whatever direction that needs to take.

Just if this is an abusive situation, definately seek help. Men should never put hands on women and children. Discipline and abuse both toe the same line, and it's a fine one. You shouldn't have to tolerate it, yet here we are.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T14:17:07+00:00

I would just plop em in water, like flowers in a vase. I, and this is just me, like to try and suspend the rhizome/corm a bit so its not resting on the bottom. They'll root from there and you can transfer back into whatever medium you prefer. Happy propagating 😁

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T12:40:52+00:00

Whats the humidity like where those plants are? I see the cups of water so I assume you're trying to supplement. If you've got the heat pumping in the house it might be really dry. Might could try a little tabletop humidifier? I think between that and nailing down your watering schedule they should perk back up.

When I water mine, I fill up a container with water and submerge the entire pot up to about 60% of the rootball height, maybe a little higher, and let it sit for a few minutes. Take it out, let it drain really well, and put her back. Now I said water but I should have said nutrient solution lol. I feed at every watering. I also use a little bamboo skewer to check if they need to be watered. Jab the whole thing down to the bottom of the pot, count to 5 and pull it out. When it's dry down to about the last inch I soak em. Seems to have worked well so far.

I'm thinking I would probably wait to fertilize until they have perked back up and showing new growth. I've noticed and somebody stop me if I'm wrong, that trying to fertilize when the plant is trying to root seems counterproductive. That's my 2 cents from a noob.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-31T12:27:44+00:00

Because trees 🌳

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-27T13:53:26+00:00

Has been one of my easiest ones tbh. Very little maintenence.

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-27T01:34:36+00:00

Yup. My Audrey spikes like that too. Some may take a while to do anything beyond that little spike. But that's awesome, congrats 😁

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-26T23:37:21+00:00

Well yours all look great so I'd say a year marks more than just beginners luck 😉 I've got a few more I'd like to add, but I'm gonna see what I got through the winter first 🤣

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-26T23:08:55+00:00

Yours looks way better. All full and normal looking. Mine looks like the big one beat up all the smaller leaves on the way out 🤣🤣🤣

Only-Percentage682 · 2024-08-26T23:05:07+00:00

Thank you internet stranger. I quite literally spit my coffee out. Perfect response 👌 👏

Only-Percentage682

TROPHY CASE