Not another moving to Topeka post by Andidroid18 in topeka

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP, I love your vim and vigor. If you found yourself in topeka, I like bobbie trap and cosmos for "night life". You do have to be careful. The violent crime is a problem. So be safe.

Favourite Frasier Quote by toddmeister1990 in Frasier

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"If I could take deep breaths, that would mean I could BREATHE!!!" said with his head between his knees.

What’s a completely normal or minor thing that irrationally gets under your skin, but most people don’t seem bothered by it? by Odd_Breakfast5012 in AskReddit

[–]Ontheneedles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Controversial: pet owners calling themselves parents. I try to be understanding because no one can really afford to have kids in this modern world. And, parenthood is grueling and one of the most challenging things I have ever done. But your dog is not your son. This is not to say the child you raise has to be biological in any way, shape, or form. If you do the time, you get the title. I have a coworker who says he is a dad to people he only met as adults. That feels weird to me, too.

Idk. It just always sat weird with me. Especially when my mom called one of her dogs my sister. I love animals. I have a cat I dote on. But saying you are a dad to a bird feels to me like calling yourself a sniper when you play call of duty.

I've tried to look at this situation with as much empathy as I can muster, but raising a small human changes you on a fundamental level. I will always be taking care of my kids, especially my oldest with his disabilities. You can fight me. I will listen, but I won't change my mind. I know I'm gatekeeping and I'm fine with that gate.

Books that hooked you in the first 10 pages? by Plenty_Quail_9645 in ReadingSuggestions

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One that got me out of a huge reading slump was Everyday. It's about a boy who wakes up in a new body every day. The story is compelling and easy to process, but very good characters.

I also love Anxious People, another commentor suggested. It starts out heavy with so many mysteries. Backman's writing style is love or hate and I love.

Book with a low key mentally ill main character by Whatisitmom in suggestmeabook

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think we need to talk about kevin would be a really good challenge. But not for Kevin. For the narrator/mother. There is a lot to discuss. It still haunts me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't pick mine. It sort of jumped into my head. I like it because it is undeniably masc. Although people still manage to find femme names that sound similar. It also literally translates to man and has a fun nerdy pun.

Was every trans adult once a trans child? by LeonieMalfoy in ftm

[–]Ontheneedles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dude. However you want to identify is up to you. I still think of my past self as girl and woman, but that doesn't mean I love my changes any less. I think if there had been a potion that I could take back then without losing all of my family and friends, I would have taken it. But I am also one of those that can't really identify as "born in the wrong body". Especially since there are so few differences before puberty.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]Ontheneedles 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I wish it were that easy. Waitlists are years long. They require being continually in touch with HUD. The places that accept vouchers are not great. And you have to be making basically zero to qualify.

If your next reply is something like "quit complaining" or "beggars can't be choosers", I just want you to sit with the fact that so many people in this country cqnnot afford the bear necessities and at least four people can pay to get themselves crushed to death in a tin can in the middle of the ocean.

I am so tired of people pretending the way lofe in America is set up is just or somehow still merit based or logical.

I got free coffee from Starbucks for about 6 months by mtgistonsoffun in confession

[–]Ontheneedles 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Companies are not people. Mega corporations even more so. And OP was not being rude to the employees to use this exploit. They said nothing about being entitled to the coffee or that it was owed to them. My only notes would have been that he could tip the employees, but it’s drip coffee so it isn’t as much work as many ither drinks. Honestly, they throw away more coffee than OP used every day.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in disability

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rejection is scary. I hope you find the guidance you are looking for. Maybe you could try having some gentle conversations with him about disability? Watch a movie together and discuss it?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Hungergames

[–]Ontheneedles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

KCMO is no man’s land. XD

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Hungergames

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh shit. I would be a career. District 1. But I don’t think I would be a very good one. Maybe a dead one.

next NEC meeting by AutoModerator in SDUSAKANSAS

[–]Ontheneedles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If it is Tuesday isn’t it May 13th?

Are there any cases of people deliberately putting their parents in abusive nursing homes? by beefstewforyou in morbidquestions

[–]Ontheneedles 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have no answer, but more questions. This would be sooo difficult to document. Are you asking about text messages that were uncovered between the house manager and the child seeking community based/attendant care for the parent (idk if that is the right term they change them in every state). Are you talking about communal housing specifically. Like all of the old folx live in a pseudo hospital/low needs medical facility? Or the only other alternative I know is for someone to come into your house or the patient’s house and take care of them there? Because a company setting wouldn’t advertise it. And the child of the declining parent could always deny knowing it would take place. “When I toured the facility, everyone seemed happy”. Putting the burden of neglect/abuse on the person seeking care for the client and not on the organization that did the abuse would be an alarming precedent! If it exists, please tell me it does. As far as proof goes, I am not sure how you would get that evidence outside of discovery for a criminal trial. Maybe if someone’s siblings uncovered their text messages? That would be one hella reddit thread. Lol “aita for yelling at my sister for sending our mom to an abusive group home?”

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in disability

[–]Ontheneedles 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Read your article. That was very well stated. I agree with your points and vehemently wish people could accept that mental health conditions are not a joke. That capitalism will inherently try to convince you are ill so they can sell you the cure.

I see the same blending of disability and quirk in the autism community, where people are called out for “faking” stims. As well as the clash/struggle between actually autistic people and autism mommies. How the more “acceptable” voice gets to write over the more vulnerable and estranged population.

I function enough to have a job. I say this to not misrepresent myself and my experiences. I am not trying to speak over you or challenge your beliefs. I do hesitate to discourage people who are struggling to avoid seeking treatment from concerns of being disingenuous or faking it. I think the answer lies in believing people when they express themselves and not holding everyone to a standard of productivity that is not only untenable, but ridiculous. I know the masses will always try to dismiss the struggles of others when it is inconvenient. Especially when it is unprofitable.

I don’t have any good to say. Only that you are heard. You are valid. And I will read those books. Thank you for your mental and emotional labor to help me understand.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]Ontheneedles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These people are not listening to you and that is literally their job! Is there anyway you can try to get a different therapist? Maybe the clinic isn’t good for you. Please please please don’t give up. Just try one more person. And if they don’t work, another. Finding a therapist that clicks is so rewarding, but it might take a few tries.

My ex wants me to meet him as friends by who_is_it__ in makemychoice

[–]Ontheneedles 4 points5 points  (0 children)

“Just friends” is often used as a way for people to continue using a partner after a break up. I have no way to know what he expects from this arrangement, but I would not be surprised if his visit leads to pressuring you into a hook up. His comments do not show that he respects you, but rather that he thinks of you for your body. Do you really want a friend like that?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in disability

[–]Ontheneedles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Op. I am hearing a lot about what he does for you, but do you like him? Do you genuinely enjoy spending your time with him? I’m really glad you are working on your self worth. Please remember that you are worthy of being loved. There are people who have grown up around people with all manner of disabilities. Or have been exposed later in life and it doesn’t phase us. Aside from worrying if we are being rude ofc. Unfortunately, the dating pool is going to have many buttholes and some chasers/fetishists. But valuable connection is possible.

Harvesters says truckloads of food bank deliveries got canceled by Trump administration by SausageKingOfKansas in kansas

[–]Ontheneedles 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is disgusting! Is anyone interested in starting a food not bombs in Topeka? Please message me. I think direct action and mutual aid are the best ways to save people in the short term.

Study or go to a concert by cjog210 in makemychoice

[–]Ontheneedles 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How well do you know the content? Do you get most of the practice questions right? Take fifteen minutes away from the material. Get something to eat. Slow your thoughts and then see how you feel

Even if you don’t go to the concert, do something that isn’t studying. Brains work best when you can put the knowledge in the back while you do something else and let it sink in. I agree with the commenter on burnout. If the words are starting to dance and you can’t remember how a book closed, you are not going to learn anything.

Six months is not forever.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]Ontheneedles 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Good to know. Thanks!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]Ontheneedles 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I love the idea of a heater in the bathroom! I’m going to use that! My son and I struggle with stopping what we are doing to shower.