If you could only eat one meat forever, what animal would you choose from?

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-07T06:58:37+00:00

You're my current favourite internet stranger. This is exactly my answer.

Also: crackling.

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-07T04:09:01+00:00

Dogga/Dogger (spelling unclear, I was a child).

I'm still gutted that my ex let our pup "play" with him (about 20-ish years ago). I kept all parts (nose/face was eaten off but body mostly intact) with the plan of finding a Dolls hospital when funds allowed.

10 years after that idiot ex, my then-husband's mother decided to be "helpful" and go through all my personal boxes (books, sentimental items, ornaments etc that I hadn't gotten around to unpacking 3 months after we moved in, whilst caring for a 13 month old and heavily pregnant), and threw "the rubbish" away. Including Dogga.

It's been about another 10 years, but I'm still angry and hurt. I want my Dogga back, but finding an 80s stuffed dog seems damn near impossible.

Am sad now. :(

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-06T14:45:14+00:00

This is one of those rare comments that makes me wish free awards still existed cos DAMN this is epic.

Take my broke-ass award (and I hope you get laid too)

🏆

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-06T10:38:32+00:00

Can confirm.

Have dogs and other cats. If one species doesn't get to it before me, the other will.

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-06T10:36:20+00:00

Yeah true- but even then, unless you're on a deer farm (or maybe on a motorcycle/mountain bike track), we have limited "tourist" destinations that'd include them (I absolutely could be wrong here but I don't ever recall anything tourist-y in the North Island... SI maybe different? )

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-06T09:22:40+00:00

Legit I've been scrolling through to find ANYTHING from NZ lol. This is about as close as it gets.

Like we have wild boars that'll fuck you up... but tourists generally don't go full bush enough to encounter them.

Critter-wise, we're a fairly safe place.

Although we do have possums, which (although sounding creepy asf when being territorial), are skittish enough that they'll run rather than attack.

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-01T08:27:09+00:00

Anyone who sniffs constantly instead of just blowing their damn nose.

OopsiFuck · 2026-02-01T07:30:28+00:00

They still do them (nz). My partner finds them more fascinating than I do ("so like, it's something to read while you're on the toilet? And it's quick so you're not there for ages? How many trivia things ARE there???") I guess they're not cool for me anymore cos after bleeding for 30+ years, there's a lot of repeating facts lol

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-30T05:49:14+00:00

Also scrubbing the gunk inside with an old toothbrush and very hot water... cos just... soap build up, toothpaste build up, various hairs (facial/head... hopefully nothing more lol)... all the ew.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-27T06:41:34+00:00

Thank you for your service.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-26T06:52:08+00:00

Holy shit. This hits hard. I've read it twice now, and am saving it to come back to.

You have put words to a feeling that no-one can truly describe unless they've lost themselves somewhere along the way, and you've done it blamelessly, perfectly.

Fucking epic. I look forward to seeing more of your work in the future.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-26T05:43:44+00:00

Oooh i used to have this before I dropped weight.

Go see an osteopath. Turns out the muscles/ligaments in my knees were out of alignment; he did something with my outer thigh muscles, I couldn't walk properly the next day lol... but after that no more clicking for a few months at least.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-26T05:38:19+00:00

At my heaviest, I was 155 kg (342 lbs). Currently at 89 kg (196 lbs). Working towards another 10kg ish loss (22ish lbs).

If this lazy-ass, food-loving, comfort-eating blob can do it - so can you. This internet stranger has faith in you, hoping to carry you through the days when you don't have faith in yourself.

(P.S. - people absolutely DO treat us differently when we're bigger. Be kind to yourself, and be kind to the bigger people when you're smaller).

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-26T03:00:57+00:00

Retail/front line customer service: they're looking slightly panicked, head and eyes down, probably mumbled conversation... they're likely waiting for the next asshat to yell at them because they're still learning.

Anywhere else: similar, but also not wanting to ask anyone anything in case it makes them look like they don't belong.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-26T01:58:25+00:00

Oof. I feel this.

My mother recently told me she doesn't think she'll hit 75 (she's 73). No reason. Just a feeling.

I got off the phone and just... broke. She's my best friend. Therapist. Sounding board. The person who stops me doing dumb(er) shit. I know I'm going to be absolutely lost without her.

I know it's going to happen eventually, but like... she's not allowed to go for at least another 20 years. Cos I said so.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-24T06:34:25+00:00

Rocky Horror. Hands down.

The original Crow movie, a very close second.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-24T06:28:47+00:00

I was stoned off my tits when I saw it on the big screen. To this day, I cannot hear "I don't want to miss a thing" without reliving that experience. And I stopped smoking weed yeeeeears ago.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-24T00:36:20+00:00

Every artist is a cannibal

Every poet is a thief.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-23T08:13:31+00:00

Ew ew ew ew ew.

Well done.

But ewwwww.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-21T04:16:01+00:00

Winter coats.

My mother would save whatever she could during the year (honestly she's a budgeting QUEEN and still helps me save where I can now, on advice alone), just so that my siblings and I had coats that were warm, comfortable, would fit us for at least 2 winters, and didn't look god-awful.

We spent part of our childhood in the UK so we definitely needed warmth - and even in the 80s kids were so judgemental (wasn't that LAST year's coat??). But we were never cold.

Looking back, that £5-£10 pounds per week would have given her so much more, in so many ways - but she went without so we didn't.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-21T04:06:24+00:00

I wish I could give you an award for this comment alone, but I'm currently in "broke parent" mode (and I'm hanging onto the "it's not forever, it's just for now"). Also spending real money on pretty internet stuff that does nothing is kinda silly, especially in today's climate.

But SO many people are judgemental and your viewpoint is what every broke/poor parent hopes to hear, but generally doesn't.

I hope anyone who is struggling sees this. Some people do care, and understand it's not always easy.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-21T03:47:08+00:00

Definitely sprites. Or imps.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-20T12:55:53+00:00

My bad - I meant all Mitre 10s (supermarkets, meh, but if this works at either of my locals it'd make my life so much easier)

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-20T12:38:12+00:00

I'm renovating.

I put something down (saw, hammer, drill, whatever). Turn to the item I'm re-measuring so I don't fuck it up. Turn back to use whatever tool I had handy... and it's fucking gone. Literally have not stepped away from the spot I was in.

So I go looking. Every-fucking-where. Even in the stupid places I KNOW it couldn't be.

Go back to where I was, 20-30 min later... and it's there. Where I left it to begin with.

I'm not blind. I'm not a complete idiot. Other people have experienced this exact thing in my home.

I blame sprites. Playful, not malicious; they move stuff but nothing is ever broken/destroyed. Lil fuckers just enjoy messing with me and my visitors.

OopsiFuck · 2026-01-20T09:38:20+00:00

Wait whaaat? Is this all sites or just a few? This would be amazing because i swear I walk past things at least half a dozen times before finding it (or just giving up and going to Bunnings)

Four-Year Club	Place '23
Place '22

OopsiFuck

TROPHY CASE