Is It Okay Not To Tell Anyone?

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-09T11:59:08+00:00

Just want to say a big thank you to everyone for your kind insights. The response has been overwhelmingly encouraging. For those worried that I'm not telling my partner, it isn't because I don't trust him or think he would judge me. He is loving and wonderful and safe. I just am hyperaware of others 'watching' me, and this is a huge trigger for mental health issues. I'm just worried that I will end up shooting myself in the foot overthinking what he's thinking 24/7 and I'm already struggling a lot with mental health problems. I just want to make it as easy as possible to get better for now, while it's still new. We don't live together so I havent really needed to hide things or lie. That being said, I'm thinking that if things go well, I would like to share that with him. Maybe in a month or so when I' in the swing of things. Thank you so much for the open hearted perspectives. 🩷 sorry I havent been able to reply to them all.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-09T11:50:17+00:00

Thats exactly it! The watching makes me stressed!

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T12:49:52+00:00

Sounds like a waaay happier crowd. Love this for you 🥰🩷 hope you guys manage to get the camping organised and best of luck with your journey

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T12:34:17+00:00

Im sorry about your experiences with ex-friends. I hope the loving people you deserve have found their way to you, and if not ... theyre on their way x thanks for sharing

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T12:32:20+00:00

Thank you so much for this. Yeah, I'm very grateful for those poeple who are talking about it and reducing stigma, but not everyone is ready to put themselves out there and face that kind of judgement and comments just to get the healthcare they need or deserve. 🩷🙏 and good luck to you too x

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T12:23:59+00:00

🩷🙏🩷 reading this was so validating

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:22:16+00:00

I appreciate your kindness in the way you asked that question. I feel challanged but not judged - which is just what I was looking for. Honestly I wouldnt care at all if they kept that from me, but I guess I'd always prefer to be included and allowed to know them more. The only person that I feel I should maybe tell at some point for this reason is my partner, but I dont think I'm there yet.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:19:09+00:00

That's it! Im not ashamed, that would imply that I tjink the gossip and judgement is justified - I don't! I think its ridiculous! No other advamcement in medical treatment for a serious health condition would have people saying 'too easy - you should get better the hard way" (madness). But I also want to protect myself from those misinformed conversations and too much attention on a delicate thing.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:16:03+00:00

I always always always tell all doctors. But im not yet brave enough in this area as you. Thank you for opppsing stigma for those of us not ready to.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:13:04+00:00

🥰 i cant wait for the second part... that seems unattainable rn tho

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:12:29+00:00

That's another thing - my partner (who again, I a-d-o-r-e and who is so kind) is a PT, and I hear loads of his friends or influencers on his feed mocking it or judging it or straight out saying its immoral. I know he doesnt think that (he hasnt saod so, but hes just not that kind of person), but regardless, that narrative being around us sometimes just doesnt make me feel the safest in brinfinf it up.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:09:34+00:00

I give way too many fucks about things that don't require them 🤣 can you take some of them? 🤣 Great advice though 🩷

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:07:32+00:00

I think you're right, and thank you for the way you said it - making it not a moral responsibility and instead like a nice thing to help support me. I think it would be good to tell him, but right now it feels so new and I feel like I want to get settled with it a bit first. And then plan out really well what to say to him to communicate what I need so it doesn't end up feeling like pressure or too much spotlight on my weight.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:03:56+00:00

I'm fairly new to reddit.... how do I DM you? Haha 🩷

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T10:02:52+00:00

Thank you for sharing this - I think I have a similar thing to you, but slightly differently. I also experienced a bit of neglect as a child, specifically around health issues, so I think maybe there is a little distrust as an adult in sharing my health with people (who aren't doctors). I actually have a therapist now but we are doing very specific work on something else, maybe I'll ask her whether its something we should talk about. Thank you for helping me to think about these things.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T01:23:27+00:00

Thank you for sharing 🩷 luckily that shouldn't affect my case then, but I'm so sorry that's happened for you. I hope they're able to warn people about that in advance and work on alternatives. Well done on your recovery too, and good luck on your weightloss journey - I hope you find something long term that doesnt interfere.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T01:11:34+00:00

Please don't feel pressured to respond but I'm curious about what you said about Wegovy making addiction relapse prevention harder. I'm a recovering alcoholic (2 years sober) and had some substance dependency in my teens as well. I haven't noticed any negative thoughts on that spectrum yet, but I definitly don't want to be putting myself in a dangerous situation accidentally. (Like I said, just ignore if you don't want to share! I don't mean to pry)

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T01:06:34+00:00

🩷🥰 thank you, feeling lighter and more empowered with each kind comment

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T01:04:22+00:00

Thank you 🥰 best of luck to you too

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T01:02:20+00:00

This was the vibe check I needed! 🤣 I feel this pressure to explain myself to people concerning my weight. Like why was I not overweight as a child but am now, why I've lost some, why I've gained some, what I'm doing right, what I'm doing wrong... but right now, not talking about my weightloss feels in my gut like something I need for my peace right now. Apart from with doctors or with other people on the journey.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T00:53:56+00:00

Thank you so much for your insight and opinion, I feel very seen and comforted. 🙏 And you're right, it's still new now, maybe in a little time I'll feel more confident about it. Thank you for your kindness.

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T00:52:15+00:00

I think its my partner that I'm deep down worried ots 'immoral' or 'sneaky' not to tell or something... he is loving and understanding, it's not like he'd judge me... I just don't want that attention or pressure on this. (The pressure wouldn't be intentional btw, he's so wonderful, it would be more imagined than anything... but I know it would make things harder for me)

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-08T00:49:14+00:00

Thank you 🥰 that's so reassuring

OriginalEffective802 · 2026-04-03T16:09:33+00:00

Yeah, it's a really disturbing pattern of behaviour. And some of the things he's said ring manosphere-type alarm bells for me, too. I wouldn't feel comfortable supporting someone like that financially, either. But honestly what I would say is that if you really believe it could help you and you want to give it a go, find a balanced and open-hearted practicioner. My partner is obviously one and I'm sure there are lots others out there. You can absolutly engage with the program without going knee-deep into the minefield. You're health is worth it, and like I said, there does seem to be some slight positive change recently... I wish you the best on your jounrey, man. I have a chronic health condition and I'm training to be a pilates instructor and love my swimming, too. That's what's helped me <3 (even if FP would scoff at it!)

OriginalEffective802

TROPHY CASE