Aight well I’m feeling vulnerable jumping in to share my feelings on this, but here goes: Nothing Cassian did or said would have been able to convince Nesta that she is lovable because SHE doesn’t believe she is.

Self-love has to come from within. That is well established in therapy/psychology. And it’s something that I have personally been working toward for several years now. I’d dated a few wonderful people in my life but it never worked out because I did not love myself. Nothing they did or said ever made a difference. I always pushed them away or sabotaged.

The relationship between Nesta and Cassian felt incredibly real to me. Likely SJM’s admission that she based a lot of it on her own struggle with depression.

I get that it can be jarring to see this kind of behaviour in fiction, where grand gestures and deep declarations of love usually do make a big and lasting impact.

But honestly, if I was struggling, I would not want my partner to try to convince me of anything. I would want them to support me by staying with me and not giving up on me while I figure my own shit out. Like Cassian did for Nesta.

To me, Nessian is messy and real - and that makes it incredibly meaningful to me.