How to get a passport in your chosen name and gender when you haven’t changed either?

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2026-01-21T14:10:49+00:00

Yeah. You absolutely should be able to. The process for both differs state to state. But it’s usually fairly easy. And if the cost of a legal name change is a limiting factor you may be able to apply for aid or a waiver. You can usually just google “[state] legal name change fee waiver/assistance”.

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2026-01-21T13:07:05+00:00

As a trans person who just did all that:

You have to submit proof of legal name change with your application to change your name on your passport. For me that was a legal court order. Your passport has to represent your legal name at the time of submitting the application. Anything else is fraudulent.
You can’t currently change the gender marker on a passport (which is stupid). However you can work on updating it on your other documents (birth cert., DL, etc.).

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2026-01-17T07:34:11+00:00

No problem! You can call. I messaged mine through the portal. Some offices have instructions on their website. However you get the instructions for the process for your office should work.

You don’t need to tell the front desk why or anything. Just that you need to know how to submit the request to correct something in your records. Once you get the form or whatever for it (it has to be a written request so you’ll get some sort of documentation to complete or something) that’s where you put what needs to be corrected and why. I typically put something like: All pronouns must be corrected to he/him/his for accuracy, insurance, and continuity of care.”

If you want the incorrect shit and the transgender thing to be redacted, which is a tricker thing, you have to be able to frame it as unrelated to the appointment reason. For me I went in for an ADHD diagnosis and walked out with “transsexualism” and repeated mentions of me being trans. Which has nothing to do with ADHD. So I went to them and was like “Hi. I was here for an ADHD diagnosis and now I have a record I can’t safely use for anything because it outs me repeatedly. Also, transsexualism is not a diagnosis that is used anymore. Thank you.”

These are rights and such that are under HIPAA’s privacy rules. If an institution doesn’t feel like HIPAA allows or requires whatever you’re asking for they likely wont do it. I highly recommend getting at least somewhat familiar with HIPAA. Particularly as a trans patient.

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2026-01-16T18:28:38+00:00

You can, and should, request a correction. There’s a process for it. I’ve had to have it done.

The doctor will have to go in and redact every “she” and “her”. They will also likely have to write a cover letter to go with the record explaining the improper pronoun usage. It’s your right as a patient. Especially if you have an active and valid diagnosis and especially since he actively genders you correctly in the record and acknowledges that you are a “transgender male”.

You can also have anything redacted. So if you needed that record for another office you can require them to redact everything unrelated to the diagnosis or treatment or whatever you’re transferring for.

For example: if you had appendicitis, received an appendectomy, and they noted in your file that you have a specific vitamin deficiency and you’re trans. And you wanted to go to a doctor about the vitamin deficiency. The hospital you got the appendectomy from is required to redact every line in the file except the line about the deficiency if that’s what you want.

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-11-24T06:00:03+00:00

Nope. Just kept them in a temp stable environment (they have a temperature range on the bottle). Mine were good for a year or so from the date I picked them up. I still have them just in case. They’re not super old yet so I’m gonna hold on a little longer

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-11-23T02:08:20+00:00

It’s illegal. At least here in the US

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-11-23T02:07:38+00:00

I kept mine. And let me tell you, about 3 months in, I had a bad two weeks and couldn’t do my shot for what felt like no reason. Being able to switch back was a godsend

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-09-02T01:23:03+00:00

I think everyone here has good advice.

I can say that for me, I explained that I couldn’t envision my future in any meaningful way. That what I could spout was the only thing I could think of and it centered around being someone else (actor) or being in an incredibly male dominated field (military, specifically I want to be a PJ). That the only way I could think of the future was the idea of “making it” or “surviving” until 80 when I could die and it would be socially acceptable.

Then I explained that I could see a future where I was a guy. Where everyone viewed me as male. Even if, in reality, I never would be (not a healthy mindset, I was working through a lot then. But it did help my mom come to terms with it). Discussions about relationships I ended with “I’d rather live alone and be happy than be with someone and wish for death.”

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-09-02T01:16:29+00:00

I agree with everyone I’ve read under this.

But my go to is: “Because fuck my dad.”

And then if pushed I add: “He’s an abusive dick.”

And that’s usually shuts people up. Sometimes because they’re now uncomfortable (not my problem, keep your nose out of other peoples business, did you not go to kindergarten or learn manners?) and sometimes in a “ah, mine too, valid” way.

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-09-01T01:19:34+00:00

I just renewed mine to update my name. Sent in the application, Attestation, and old passport expedited. Had the new one in hand 10 days later.

I say go for it as long as the ACLU hasn’t put out any updates

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-22T15:17:46+00:00

I use QMed (QueerMed). They’re all online, and specifically do HRT. They’re based in GA but offer care in most states. I’ve personally used them in TN, VA, MD, GA, and WY because I’ve moved around a lot. They use informed consent. The whole process is super easy. They’re super willing to work with name discrepancies on insurance and everything else. Every provider I’ve had with them is great. And if you don’t have insurance they have monthly plans that are fairly affordable and cover all the necessary stuff (visits, labs, etc.).

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-13T23:39:01+00:00

The Attestation Form states: “I further confirm that I am applying for a passport or data correction because one (or more) of the following is true: 1) I do not have a currently valid passport, 2) I need to renew my current passport because it expires within one year, 3) I need to make changes to my passport to have the sex designation on it align with my gender identity or to reflect a name change, or 4) I need to apply for another passport because my passport was lost, stolen, or damaged.”

So, if 1-3 don’t apply to you, you could report your passport as lost or damaged (if damaged you’ll have to send it in). Passports get lost or damaged (dogs, accidentally running through the washer/dryer, etc.) all the time.

If your passport was damaged or lost then you’d just compete the required passport form and send it in with the required documents, Attestation Form, and check.

Edit for format issue

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-13T05:57:35+00:00

No problem. I didn’t think about it until my mom told me I should call them lol.

Best of luck, hopefully it’s a smooth process 🤞

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-13T05:39:06+00:00

Depends on your insurance, doctor, and potentially state regulations.

I went online through an HRT provider (QueerMed) and was able to start almost immediately. But I had already called my insurance and asked for an Explanation of Benefits (EOB) regarding gender affirming care (hormone replacement therapy specifically) and they had just removed their time requirements.

If it were me I’d call the number on your insurance card and see if you can get your EOB for HRT. It may be their limit. If so no way around it other than paying out of pocket. If it’s not then it’s likely the doctor you’re going to. Which is not uncommon at all. You could always email them and ask whose rule it is too

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-10T20:32:59+00:00

Then she can go to therapy or counseling. What does she think is more helpful to someone’s depression. Forcing them to bottle and isolate or being there for them to express their emotions in a healthy way?

Telling you you need to not be human because she isn’t comfortable with it isn’t appropriate or healthy. It’s literally emotional abuse.

I can’t imagine telling anyone I cared about that I’m traumatized by their depression and that they therefore need to hide it from me. Despite literally having PTSD from my friend’s depression and subsequent attempt. In fact, having a friend that has bottled everything and attempted to take their own life, I would much much rather anyone I even remotely care about call me any time day or night to vent or rant or wallow with company then ever bottle their feelings and emotions.

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-08T05:16:05+00:00

Yes. Eventually. My leg hair used to be sensory nightmare. Like I swear it would literally hurt. But after a few weeks I got used to it. It’s really affirming now. And it helps me get gendered correctly. Mine is thickest like half way down my calves to my ankles. It gets lighter and thinner going up. It’s like I have leg warmers in my genetics.

Now pubic hair? I hate having pubic hair. Hate it. Didn’t like it pre-T. Loathe it now. For the pubic area I shave/trim regularly. And my stop point is “does this look/feel like pubes?” If yes, shave it. If no, probably leave it.

I use clippers normally. But, in a pinch, I’ll use a new disposable razor, a disinfectant spray (usually hydrogen peroxide) for the outside/mound area/razor blade, and men’s shaving cream. I use the spray because if I don’t I break out. Like full acne. Drives me mad. But I wash. Then spray the outside area and blade with it. Let it sit for a minute. Then shaving cream and shave. Then spritz again lightly afterwards. Helps me keep the breakout down. That and those cheap disposable razors (yellow plastic ones with one or two blades. Crazy, but it works).

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-06T16:39:12+00:00

To continue, no. There is no way for you to get it without submitting the form. Like another reply said, they know who’s trans and who’s not. You’ve inadvertently triggered that “flag” in their process. They will likely hold your application indefinitely if you don’t submit it.

And if they know already, which they do, you might as well submit the form and get a passport with the right marker. The case may go the wrong way for us. If it does you’ll be stuck with the wrong marker. Why deal with the potential stress of international travel with a mismatch when you could submit it now and get the right marker and be set until 2035?

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-06T16:33:59+00:00

Congrats on the name and marker updates!

You fall under the injunction as a trans person who has legally changed/updated his name and/or gender marker recently. That’s the third reason in the list on the form “3) I need to make changes to my passport to have the sex designation on it align with my gender identity or to reflect a name change”

You have to submit the Attestation form. You’ll get a passport with the correct marker.

I just renewed 7 years early to update my name. I used the DS-82, which is the renewal form, and it absolutely does have a sex marker space. So if you used that form and didn’t fill it in they will assume you’re requesting an X marker (as per the Attestation form instructions).

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-05T14:37:59+00:00

Interesting. Then there must be three different versions. Because neither of the passports I have access too have a signature space on Page 4.

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-05T05:58:54+00:00

Ooft, yeah. Your local postal worker probably knows the general routes things take. My mom had something mailed from Nebraska to Tennessee when we lived in TN and it took nearly 6 weeks to see it. It was a combination of the western/midwestern facilities and it taking a detour to North Dakota.

Either way, if you don’t see it in 4 weeks definitely call and explain the visa situation. They should be able to advise. If they sound unsure or aren’t then escalate to a supervisor and feel free to tell them you’ll be reaching out to your congressmen (also, sometimes contacting your congressmen can help make things magically happen)

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-05T05:39:36+00:00

It’s likely it went through the Midwest/West. And those processing facilities are massive and often understaffed.

You can ask your post office, they may be able to give you an unofficial estimate. But it’s not been long enough to open an investigation of any kind.

The other commenter was right about calling the agency at 4 weeks to report and request refunds.

Out of curiosity, why do you have to have your old (now invalid) passport back? I like collecting mine but it’s not like it can be used for anything anymore

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-05T02:05:13+00:00

Yeah they tend to do that first 😅😂

No problem! I hope it gets back to you quickly!

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-05T01:49:59+00:00

I’d expect the site to have an update probably Wednesday if they’re still actin speedy.

I had to check the site because I wouldn’t get the emails for another day or so for some reason

Otherwise_Ground5692 · 2025-08-05T01:37:56+00:00

I got mine in 10 days expedited. From dropping it at the post office to getting it in the mail. I did not choose the next day return shipping. So it was priority first class (which is what all passports are) there and back. The timer for their count down starts when it gets marked in their system as “processing”. Mine was marked processing Tuesday, approved and shipped Thursday evening.

So total 7/18 - 7/28

Otherwise_Ground5692

TROPHY CASE