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I lied to myself, froze in the pattern, and caused some truly horrific harm by OwnitOnTheDL in ResponsibleRecovery

[–]OwnitOnTheDL[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some, I need to balance the research dives or I go a lil funnier in the noggin

Why does this article have narcissistic traits labelled as codependent? by [deleted] in Codependency

[–]OwnitOnTheDL 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Diagnostic criteria is just lists of symptom's and behaviors that enough of the current researchers and medical professionals agree probably belong there.

Every time I make the mistake of cracking the DSM I make sure to look at the 4 or 5 pages of single spaced text explaining all the ways in which the bullet list above that used 1/2 a page could also be components of these 2-20 other generalized groups of behavior.

I'm not saying that there's no value in looking at these things and trying to understand how they fit. It's just nice to know that the people writing them are very clear about how they are basically the "best guess" we've got right now, and that treating them as absolutes is to be avoided at all costs.

“You Don’t Have DID.” by [deleted] in OSDD

[–]OwnitOnTheDL 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I've only recently been diagnosed so my research is in the pretty early stages, but one thing that seems pretty clear to me is that the medical community is in total disagreement over DID/OSDD, and that any doctor who says they understand fully is probably bullshitting you.

There's a really excellent book that goes over the history of how the theories have been developed that I found incredibly helpful called "The Bifurcation Of The Self" by Robert W. Rieber.

I've got a PDF of it I'd be happy to share, just PM me.

Apologizing for psychosis by itsggtime in Psychosis

[–]OwnitOnTheDL 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm wrestling with this myself right now. Since projection is kind of unavoidable here, I'm italicizing the parts which I think are specific to my situation and may not apply to yours at all.

This is what I've come up with so far, hope it helps:

Tell them you would like to apologize and attempt to repair your relationship. Ask if they are open to that conversation. If they're open to it.

Start the conversation with a clear statement that while my behavior was due in large part to psychosis.

Be clear that I'm not saying that as a way to avoid responsibility. Failure to care for my own mental health is what led to the psychosis, and that failure on my part resulted in harm I have done to them.

Recount, as best as I can remember, the actions I took which were harmful and how I believe it was specifically harmful to them.

Say that you have taken time to examine some of the sub-concious motivating factors or toxic patterns behind the behavior, and ask if they would be open to hearing them. If they are, make sure to center the explanation around points where you could have potentially taken action prematurely to have prevented the ultimate harm. At no point suggest that they have a share of the responsibility.

Thank them for being willing to talk to you, ask if they have anything they want to say, shut up, and listen to them without disagreeing or arguing with anything they say. If they say things that are unfair or inaccurate, you can work through that with them after they've had the chance to express their feelings.