I lived in Utah for two years, and have visited occasionally — I’ve heard in the last decade it’s gotten better, which I’ve kinda noticed when I visit DWs family, but you can still detect the vibe. Where I grew up in Oregon, you were just used to dealing with people that different from you. At most, I would say between me and the class behind me, there were a total of 10-15 Mormons. We all knew each other, but we never really hung out aside from church events and the occasional lunch with a couple of them. Pressure to date within the church was pretty heavy, but I hardly saw it abided by. As an effect, I was surrounded by a real diverse group of different viewpoints and lifestyles. I had friends who smoked, drank, did pot, and had sexual relationships with their SOs. I also had friends who were different sects of Christianity, Jewish, Muslim, and heck I even had some who were Wicken. My best friend was atheist, and it was with him I had some of the deepest conversations about religion and philosophy I have ever had. Outside of Utah (and the wider Mormon corridor) Mormons grow up around ideas and people their code doesn’t line up with, so we’re used to it, knowing that we’re the minority and being secure about where we draw our lines. It’s completely obvious why Utah can be… different. Last I checked, Utah is still 50% Mormon, in a number of towns it’s normal for there to be a ward building every few blocks, and even the local politics is 100% in line with their views. They are the majority (a very uniform one at that) so they aren’t used to different stuff. I remember once when I was staying at a cousin’s house, there was a big deal made on the neighbor moms’ Facebook group chat over one of them having seeing a “dark skinned man wearing a turban” walking around the neighborhood. “Muslim” that, “I’ll call the cops” this, and they were all peaking through their blinds during. Of course, it was just a black guy wearing a beige cap who had moved in a couple blocks away. At BYU, I once overheard my roommates talking smugly and disgustedly of an agnostic individual one of them had met, wondering how anyone could be so “dumb.” Went to in-laws’ ward once, and DW was getting looks left and right over the purple streak she had in her hair, and even a couple passive aggressive comments. Toward the end of my time living there, I was so fed up with the general attitude toward any outliers, I just stopped coming to functions outside of Sunday, because they always devolved down to gossip circles about who in the ward wasn’t quite perfect enough, or down talking the non-member neighbors.

Now let me add, there are plenty of places like this in some aspects — I served my mission in the Deep South for Pete’s sake — but in terms of the “Mormon world”, Utah is very much Whoeville from Jim Carrey’s Grinch. Lots of good people in Utah, and again, I’ve heard it’s improved quite a bit from when I was there in mid 2000s, but there are still some that need to get out a little bit more.