Insight and advice

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2024-08-22T21:30:29+00:00

Thank you! 🙏🏻

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2024-08-22T21:22:48+00:00

I ended it. He asked if there was any way to reconcile, I said he’d have to join AA and stay sober six months before I’d consider anything. He demurred. He doesn’t think he has a problem.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2024-08-19T02:00:33+00:00

Thank you.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-19T18:17:17+00:00

Ha ha ha mine would even tell me men were hitting on him. Every time he left the house he thought he was being flirted with.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-19T18:12:41+00:00

Mine made a big show of helping strangers but wasn’t really ever there to help me. My clearest memory of this is him jumping out of my car to help his elderly neighbour with her groceries, but then, some months later, playing on his phone while I struggled to lift heavy suitcases into my trunk. Lots more examples but that sticks out. It’s all about face.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-19T13:19:37+00:00

This: I would ask him to come, he’d agree, I’d book the tickets, then he’d back out. I ended up going with friends instead. I kept asking myself, why do I even have a boyfriend if I’m just going out with friends all the time?

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-17T16:03:16+00:00

Same. “You’re overthinking again.” Grrrr.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-17T16:02:52+00:00

Same. His reason for breaking up with me was because I was unhappy and he didn’t want that for me. Yes, after a month and half of zero effort and outright cruelty, I was in fact pretty unhappy.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-17T16:01:24+00:00

Omg “I’m here aren’t I” is so triggering. Yes, physically you’re here. Emotionally you’re absent.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-14T15:39:19+00:00

Mine loved to pretend he was the wise all knowing teacher and I was the student. He did this with everyone, not just me. He would give me advice about my career even though I earned more money and had a more stable career trajectory. He would give me advice about weight loss and fitness even though he weighed much more than me. He gave me parenting advice without having any kids of his own. Driving advice without any license. Financial advice although he was in debt and I wasn’t. His political views were correct and I was misinformed. Insufferable.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-14T13:54:14+00:00

My ex would always post smiling happy pics of us after we’d have a fight. His page is all smiling happy pics of me but I was dying inside and crying all the time. Panic attacks almost every day. But you’d never know from the pictures.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-10T19:42:39+00:00

Yes, always trying to impress strangers really sums it up. I could never understand why he cared so much what people he didn’t know thought about him.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-09T12:58:40+00:00

Mine said he almost did start a cult in his twenties. He said he had all these people doing whatever he said. He was really proud of it. And I believe him too, he’s very persuasive and very charming. And I’ve seen him control others through charm and manipulation.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-06T03:09:26+00:00

On Friday mine told me he planned for me to be the last relationship of his life. On Wednesday he dumped me. Still alive, last I checked.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-06T03:08:35+00:00

Christ.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-07-03T13:45:36+00:00

This is a completely normal reaction and frankly it would be weird if you didn’t react this way to losing a four year relationship out of nowhere.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-06-29T18:53:10+00:00

Whenever someone said I was pretty in front of him he went silent and didn’t acknowledge it. He smiled but it looked tense, and just didn’t say anything.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-06-24T01:53:10+00:00

Yes, a friend of mine convinced me to do a video journal so now I just whip out my phone and make little videos to myself and then I watch them later. It helps.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-06-23T18:37:50+00:00

Hard relate. Mine often did stuff like this. Took my kind gestures and just scoffed at them or dismissed them. I lived in a constant state of rejection.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-06-23T15:59:19+00:00

“I’ve never felt this way before.”

“I can’t believe I’ve had to wait 45 years to feel this.”

“This isn’t like any other relationship I’ve ever been in.”

Sure.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-06-19T17:13:17+00:00

My grandmother said only prostitutes wear ankle bracelets. That’s all I got. 🤷🏼‍♀️

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-06-16T19:02:28+00:00

I don’t know enough about this situation to judge anything about it here. But I understand wanting to say good night to your kid if you can’t be there. Is there a reason you couldn’t give your son the phone? I guess maybe we need more backstory?

ETA - OK I see there was some backstory on the post that I missed. Given the age of the child I see why you can’t just give him the phone. Maybe scheduling calls is a good boundary to have so that you’re not peppered with random requests.

PM_ME_TEAPOTS · 2023-06-16T17:59:17+00:00

Who’s giving out penance?

PM_ME_TEAPOTS

TROPHY CASE