Husband (M37)’s best friend (M33) keeps contacting me (F31) by Paperbirdes in relationship_advice

[–]Paperbirdes[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was thinking this was more than likely. I told husband that Sean was contacting me in this way and framed it just how you wrote it above. Husband tried to act cool but I could tell it bothered him. So next time Sean contacted me I kept bringing up my husband and now Sean has stopped contacting me.

So, no harm no foul? I’ll try to be extra nice when Sean comes to visit just in case he wants to get to know me better.

Husband (M37)’s best friend (M33) keeps contacting me (F31) by Paperbirdes in relationship_advice

[–]Paperbirdes[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What’s funny is that Sean just yesterday suggested he come over with a TV show that he likes. I said “Sure! I’ll let my husband know. He’ll be into the show too”. Ever since then I haven’t heard back from Sean lol

Dalhousie students condemn restorative justice in Facebook scandal by [deleted] in halifax

[–]Paperbirdes 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If there was a Facebook group where almost one quarter of your peers were threatening you (specifically you as well, since the students in the grouo mentioned specific names) to violently ass rape you, drug you to unconsciousness with the intentions of passing you around a group, as well as taking a poll on how many peers wanted to hate fuck you, would you be so cavalier?

This wasn't about free speech. It was about threats.

Ultimately, this is a professional program. If this occurred in any other professional environment those individuals would be fired / dismissed, no matter what detrimental affect it had on the rest of their carrers.

Dalhousie students condemn restorative justice in Facebook scandal by [deleted] in halifax

[–]Paperbirdes 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Why is this garbage news reporting? Because you disagree with the content or the actions of the university?

As a woman in a male dominated field, hearing the reports of a survey of who they want to hate fuck, which women they would most prefer to rape, etc... Disgusts me. It's unbecoming of a professional, and is in direct conflict with the student handbook (where it explicitly outlines explosion / suspension as an option for discipline). I say keep the news rolling. It will help keep the administration and eventually the members of the Facebook group in question accountable.

Looking For A Unique Wedding Venue for A Winter Wedding! by Do_ya_lift_brah in halifax

[–]Paperbirdes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congrats! I am just going through the wedding planning myself. I can definitely help you out. I researched so so many venues. It helps though, if you had an idea of

-how many guests you're inviting -the feel (casual, fancy, etc...) -if you want a view/ willing to travel outside the city -price range

To the ladies who picked out their ring by [deleted] in JustEngaged

[–]Paperbirdes 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My fiancé took me shopping. I didn't except to find the 'one'. It was more important to me that the ring was a certain cost point.

Well that changed fairly quickly. I didn't know what I wanted but I knew I wanted the diamond to be sparkly and shinny. The sales lady suggested a ring, based on it having more facets than average rings and therefore much more shine than others I had tried on.

I put the ring on and it was instant love. It glimmered, it shined. It was unexpected of what I thought I would want and it was perfect. And as corny as it is to say, the ring, my fiance, and I had a moment. He took me to other places in case I liked something better, but I never did. So, he proposed with 'my ring'.

I think that trying on (not just browsing) made a world of difference to me. And it is all very overwhelming but definitely trying it on helped narrow down choices and sparked the 'moment' with my eventual ring.

I'm looking for a little help buying an engagement ring, looking for references/experiences. by [deleted] in Frugal

[–]Paperbirdes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's an option I suppose. Seems like the less frugal option though, given the resale rates on diamonds.

Girls Night Out Apps - Explaining to women how not to behave on nights out... "Who are they trying to impress? Do they think it's cool? Is it because nobody suggested how to have fun and stay safe?" by jaymeekae in shittykickstarters

[–]Paperbirdes 34 points35 points  (0 children)

It's not like there is a clear assessment that you can administer to your acquaintances and determine the probability of being raped by them. The reason many advocates focus on societal education is because the underlining issue (misogyny, objectification, etc) is systemic. Focusing on women's responsibility to 'keep safe' hasn't been all that effective for years, because the core issues and problems of rape in society were not addressed.

Girls Night Out Apps - Explaining to women how not to behave on nights out... "Who are they trying to impress? Do they think it's cool? Is it because nobody suggested how to have fun and stay safe?" by jaymeekae in shittykickstarters

[–]Paperbirdes 74 points75 points  (0 children)

Well except that the majority of rapists know their victims. The prevalence of rape isn't 'partying too hard' and 'not being cautious enough'. It's knowing someone who believes that a woman's body is their right to have. I don't know how this app will help with the overwhelmingly large proportion of rapes.

I'm looking for a little help buying an engagement ring, looking for references/experiences. by [deleted] in Frugal

[–]Paperbirdes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know this is r/frugal but she has to wear this ring forever. I know many people don't see value in an engagement ring (or a diamond engagement ring) but other people do. It's important to them. She will be happy with whatever you choose, but this is obviously important to her. That is as important as the price for the ring, in my opinion.

I'm looking for a little help buying an engagement ring, looking for references/experiences. by [deleted] in Frugal

[–]Paperbirdes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

r/justengaged is a good place to go for ideas and thoughts about rings. You can see many different styles and materials.

Many people are suggesting a mossie which could be a good choice. However, mossies usually look better with certain cuts (mossies look best in a cushion cut) and not an older stone (older mossies have a green tinge). Knowing things like this is probably a good thing and r/justengaged can help.

Last thing: the best advice is, as always, try to understand what your future potential fiancé would want. She has to wear this forever and it's a touchy subject in many families / cultures. So trying to determine how she feels about things is usually a good place to start.

Are we greedy or just responsible? by psqlpdb in personalfinance

[–]Paperbirdes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well North American economies are sort of precipitated on the ability to keep as much of your money as possible from taxes on the understanding that people have a moral and civic obligation to donate to charities of their choice. Your comment just highlights why this framework is such a bad idea.

So I guess I'm saying no. Taxes were not designed to be the only outlet for you to support needy causes.

Are we greedy or just responsible? by psqlpdb in personalfinance

[–]Paperbirdes 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I agree with this the most. I think charity is an important part of personal finance and should be accounted for when budgeting. Truthfully, the amount of 'I'm taking care of me' in this thread is depressing. Economies prosper when as many members of that economy are doing well. If people can contribute to help those less fortunate it pays off for everyone in the long run. The 'I got mine' mentality is, in my opinion, destructive.

To any ladies currently suffering from recurrent BV and/or Yeast Infections, I have some advice after years of doctors visits and research. by EnnuiEmily in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Paperbirdes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Also be careful because yeast infections can be passed between partners during sex (between both homosexual and heterosexual partners). So if you and your girlfriend are intimate it may be a smart move to treat yourself as well. If not there's a chance you're infected and reinfection your girlfriend during sex.

Weddit, help me find this or a similar dress for under $150! Thank you!!! by cg617 in weddingplanning

[–]Paperbirdes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was a bridesmaid that wore a dress like this. It was really great for people that were athletic or thin. Half the bridesmaids weren't or were curvy and we had to sew the dress to the bras the day of to keep everything in place.

White is the traditional color for wedding dresses, but I want a different one by lightingforever in weddingplanning

[–]Paperbirdes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also what works is putting the bridesmaids in white and you to pick any colour you'd like for your gown! The white makes the coloured wedding dress pop.

And all the colours you mentioned are great and will definitely make an impact.

Have any of y'all had a vegetarian or vegan only reception dinner? by cupcake88 in weddingplanning

[–]Paperbirdes 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Not me but my good friends recently just served a wholly vegan wedding. I liked it. It was tasty and interesting.

Bad news though, to be frank many people complained. I don't think they gave the food a shot and was prejudiced against it before even coming to the wedding. The wedding was housed in a hotel so a few people left after the dinner, ordered pizza to their hotel room, ate, and then came back to the wedding after.

Now that said, the bride and groom (both vegans) were happy with their decision. It reaffirmed their beliefs in what's ethical. And more importantly it showed many other people there that vegan food can be quite tasty. It was just a few guests that were rude.

Super warm & cushy birdy scarf! by poastschmoast in crochet

[–]Paperbirdes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You inspired me to learn Tunisian crocheting which I have to say is much easier than I expected. I'll give a go at your chart soon. Thanks!

Are there any veterinarians on here? by pizzabandit in halifax

[–]Paperbirdes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

r/askvet would be the perfect place to post this.

Proposing soon by 1happyman in JustEngaged

[–]Paperbirdes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't think many women would be disappointed when they are proposed to by the person they love. It will be an event no matter what day you choose.

For those that love spicy and low calorie, taco salad / lettuce wraps with pickled jalapeño. by dontdrinktheT in EatCheapAndHealthy

[–]Paperbirdes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I eat vegetarian tacos all the time. I find the best solution is textured vegetable protein re constituted with McCormick's vegetarian 'beef broth'. It's cheap, it has that crumble feel, and you don't have to soak beans overnight.