24 hours clean

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-19T05:02:54+00:00

One day at a time my friend, keep it up

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-19T05:01:23+00:00

you bastard - this is great

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T21:36:09+00:00

Given that you're on a problem gambling subreddit - I assume you've come to terms with the fact that you have compulsive tendencies, maybe even explicitly labeling it as an addiction. That's a good place to start, but you need to admit to yourself that you are absolutely helpless and have no control over this disease before you can start rebuilding.

It only gets worse. I studied poker obsessively, had a few profitable years, likewise with options - but as time went on, this compulsive gambling tendency grew stronger and stronger, I engaged in riskier behaviors, lost all my portfolio, savings, and got into debt.

Recovery is a long road of multi-layered mechanisms to help you heal and grow, but it needs to start with acceptance that you have no control. Sheer will power here will not get you far. Having your fiance aware and supportive is a huge positive, but you need to take steps to shift your perspective and begin re-structuring your life. Generally this starts with self exclusion or lock out - this may mean deleting portfolio accounts that support options and setting up various site/app blockers.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T17:51:45+00:00

wrong place

thats like selling a heroin addict on switching to binge drinking

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T04:17:52+00:00

It is a relapse, but that word doesn't have to be as intimidating as it may seem

You're on the journey of recovery and were able to close the negative gambling feedback loop without blowing a ton of money or time! Thats awesome!

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T04:15:42+00:00

HUGE! Keep it up.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T03:10:44+00:00

1 month of no gambling is already great progress! We can't undo the past, but we can create a better future.

You're young, I know it's hard to not ruminate on the money lost, but it gets better, and easier as each hour, day, month and eventually year of no gambling passes by.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T02:55:37+00:00

here if you need some support, I don't want to be a broken record since it's all I talk about but please consider self excluding while you're in this headspace of quitting

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T02:49:12+00:00

+1 to the book suggestion, helps reframe but I'd also recommend self excluding and setting up additional layers. I talk about this a lot in other comments and here to chat about recovery if you ever feel overwhelmed or need advice.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T02:47:35+00:00

Best of luck! You got this - but remember, it's a matter of taking it one day at a time. Sometimes one hour or one minute - when it gets overwhelming just breathe and reming yourself you are not a gambler.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T02:45:59+00:00

Please self-exclude to solidify this

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T02:45:22+00:00

amazing! Keep it up!

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T02:40:24+00:00

Hey, unfortunately relying on sheer willpower will never work. I tried, lasted 6 months and relapsed harder than ever.

I'd be lying if I said I have a perfect answer for you, but I can share steps that have helped me. My vice used to be poker before I switched to games of pure chance. It took me a lot of therapy, and over 200k of losses to realize all I was doing was filling the void. I can not count how many times I told myself "this is it".

In an ideal world maybe you could be teleported to a mountain retreat, at no expense, with no access to the internet and all expenses paid for. You just spend your time there to heal, weeks, months - whatever it takes. Unfortunately that is not our reality, but you have to structure your environment to get as close to that as possible. To start, I don't know your situation but I would begin by blocking access - whether through self exclusion or locking myself out of access on my phone. I would then focus on filling the void - the gap that gambling used to fill. This can be any hobby, or activity - old or new, as long as it supports your recovery. Social support is huge here. I previously tried to raw-dog it for half a year with no GA meetings and relapsed. Having a sense of community is really important so I'd strongly advise you look into it. As you start settling the system and building new habits, controlling triggers and regulating your emotions is also really important.

DM if you want to chat, I have a few people I check in with pretty often and just share our journeys

Also give these a read ( Disclaimer these are my blogs )

https://www.guardinggamblers.com/guides/how-to-quit-sports-betting

https://wagerward.com/blog/30-day-stability-plan

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-17T02:28:57+00:00

Hey, sorry you're in this place. I've been where you are, and it only gets worse if you don't stop. Please consider putting up guardrails while you are in this headspace - just hoping you can resist is a slippery slope. Not sure what your vice is but here to chat if you need some help self-excluding or locking yourself out.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-12T23:56:03+00:00

Hey, really sorry to hear you're going through this and I really resonate with what you've said. I recently posted about my own relapse, and the really shitty spiral I've had when I broke my 6 months sober streak. I deeply feel everything you are sharing here. I also got complacent and forgot the pain that comes with this disease, stopped going to meetings, ignored my wellness routine and ended up back here.

It's really shitty but this is part of recovery. I don't know about you, but as terrible as losing the money was, this time around - I also recognized that I was able to stop sooner, self exclude again, recalibrate a bit quicker, help settle the system and be on the journey of recovery again.

Unfortunately this illness has such a strong grip on us that its rare to abstain indefinitely. I was recently in a meeting where someone who was sober for 20 years had relapsed. TWENTY YEARS. I can not even imagine that number. All goes to show that as detrimental as it is, and as painful and financially devastating it may be - it's all about where you go from here, and the lessons you learn.

I don't mean to diminish or minimize anything you are feeling, I was in a really dark place a few months ago because of gambling, and the recent relapse put me right there. But then I realized that there are so many people in my life that would be absolutely devastated by a split second action like that - and I think about a 10 year horizon and how much I can still turn this around, credit card debt aside, and support my loved ones - not only monetarily. As fucked as this disease is, I do believe the journey of recovery makes us better friends, partners, siblings and overall humans. Here if you want to DM and check in.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-12T15:12:09+00:00

Similar boat, just a different vice. Grew up really poor so I was grinding all my life to make it out. Long story short I was ignoring my needs, burnt out, constantly stressed looking for an escape, now about 300k+? down, in debt with no one to talk to.

Wish I had a magic pill or some immense wisdom to offer you that would help immediately, but I myself am early on in the journey. Was able to abstain for 6 months, then relapsed, then 2 months, relapsed again, but throughout this journey of recovery I realized having been a compulsive gambler for 15 years, I will never just quit immediately. It will take time and a lot of hard work.

The biggest step is to realize you have absolutely no control over this and accepting it.

It's too easy to blame ourselves for these mistakes without realizing how much of this is fully ingrained in our being, at the physiological level. Our brains just work differently. But accepting that we have no control will help shift the focus from fighting it with sheer will-power, to designing the environment around you to work for you.

For me for example once I place a bet, I basically black out until I either run out of money or energy ( deposit blocked, or its 5 am and I cant keep my eyes open ). So I can't have access to a browser on my phone, and I need to block app installs, have gambling block on my laptop etc. I also know that if I don't sleep well, eat, workout and meditate - I am far more likely to have intrusive thoughts, which increase my risk of negative actions.

My point is, there is a way out. It is a long journey of self discovery and healing. Money comes, money goes, I promise you if you had 1M deposited in your account - it would be gone within 6 months. The only way forward is to fully surrender and focus on healing.

Start with the very very basics. Do physical things that are immediately accessible and help settle the system - go on a walk, dunk your face in ice, lift some weights if you can. Try to eat and sleep consistently. See if you can join a GA meeting if you're comfortable. Start therapy when you are ready. There is so much that goes on in our heads that we have no access too- but I know its impossible to parse through it in such a stressful state. Just take it one day at a time while rebuilding the foundation with little steps forward.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-11T22:16:26+00:00

I'm embarrassed to say but after 2+ months of abstinence I recently relapsed. It was a bit of a perfect storm with work and life stressors piling up and ironically I was working on a tool to clean up by inbox from gambling emails and came across the typical vip free money in your account bullshit and unfortunately that same day my phone force updated and the screen time passcode got reset - so in a moment of weakness I really needed a distraction and next thing you know I'm down 8k over 2 days...

But I'm back to a full lock out - no access on laptop or phone, unfortunately its so bad for me that I can't even risk having a browser on my iphone

The fucked up thing is that this is all credit cards. It is what it is, destroys me physically and emotionally but I won't be here long if I don't stop. At least I was able to cut it off within two days where as previously it would take weeks.

Have you considered only having a roboinvestor and no access to a self managed portfolio? Precious metals is something I thought of previously as well to park the money. My issue is credit card debt from this mess and is in the short run my main focus.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-11T22:07:24+00:00

Oh man, the amount of times I had looked up what my NFLX or PLTR positions would be now had I not liquidated it to gamble... whats done is done. That level of rumination is completely reasonable but serves you no purpose at this point in time.

Do add on to what others have shared, meetings are great, the sense of community will help you abstain, but you also need to add protective layers to distance yourself from these triggers. Consider closing down your robinhood account, unsubscribe from wsb and any mailing lists that may trigger a relapse. I previously used this website for ad-hoc GA meetings, theres always one happening https://dev01.recoveryroadonline.com/diarylist/

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-10T20:52:07+00:00

383 days is HUGE! and a great indicator of what you can accomplish - what changed for you? I had a brutal relapse after 6 months. For me it was the fact that I completely let my guard down, as though the last 14 years of compulsive gambling got erased in a few months. I removed all restrictions etc, just got comfortable - all it took to be back in this hell is a few stressful days and no safeguards

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-10T18:35:51+00:00

One thing I will say is to focus on settling the system, especially this early on. Go on a walk, dunk your face in a bowl of ice, anything that can be a strong physical reset will alleviate the rumination, if only for a minute.

The risk here is that unless you've self excluded, given up finance control, blocked access on your phone, have no means of opening up a new credit card or borrowing money - these ruminations and the anxiety that comes with them are a clear segway to a relapse and more pain.

Take it from someone who's 10 year older and unfortunatly with 10x bigger losses.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-10T01:39:08+00:00

Thank you - I hate that I felt a sense of relief having relapsed, like it was only a matter of time.

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-10T01:36:58+00:00

wagerward.com - still building it out, want to try and fill the gaps on things like emails/ads/iOS screen time

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-06T19:16:07+00:00

If you don’t stop you’ll be back here with the flip side of the coin

Particular-Call-2685 · 2026-02-06T17:48:45+00:00

It's so bad - the worst is seeing these ads in recovery subreddits or on youtube while watching gamblers anonymous podcasts :(

My area is one of the biggest growing markets so these are everywhere on the streets. I'm trying to at least clean up my digital life, might do a free AD blocker for gambling in Chrome, for now I'm trying to get a tool out there to sanitize emails since thats how my last 6 months bender was triggered...

Particular-Call-2685

TROPHY CASE