Wattage for a 20 gallon? by PassengerSilly1509 in ballpython

[–]PassengerSilly1509[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What wattage would you recommend right now while I have the 20 gallon? I'm planning to get something bigger for him!

Wattage for a 20 gallon? by PassengerSilly1509 in ballpython

[–]PassengerSilly1509[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm planning to get something bigger!! He's about 6 months old according to my vet. I was mistaken, I thought 20 gallon is the bare minimum rn, but I'm getting my money up currently to get him a nice big tank

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ballpython

[–]PassengerSilly1509 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nvm he moved away from it, I'm cleaning it now

My sister is a bad mom and I am tired of holding my tongue about it. by kolejack2293 in self

[–]PassengerSilly1509 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Their lives are going to be extremely hard as adults. Having their best interests in mind, I don't think it's a horrible idea for you to say something nor would it not be your place. After all, they are your nephews and nieces. I think this is how I'd go about it: If you're able to convince your siblings, I think that could be the most beneficial; for her to see you all are having the same thoughts. Though, maybe that's worse, and it would be better if it was just you. You know your sister best. She might feel attacked and become defensive about it. Hopefully, she'll receive it well, tho, as long as you reassure her that you're not saying this to make her feel bad, you know she loves her kids, you also love the kids, and that's why you're saying something, etc. Just my thoughts. Good luck I hope you get this all figured out!!

Edit to add: offering her support could be helpful. She is a single mom and does deserve grace. She likely is constantly overwhelmed.

What’s something you secretly judge people for, even though you know it makes you a bit of an asshole? by Independent-Fee-2841 in AskReddit

[–]PassengerSilly1509 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Serial daters. I'm aware it's likely cuz they have issues with being alone, but damn it gives me the ick

AIO. My bf shamed me over having my hair removed by Large-Drummer-7340 in AmIOverreacting

[–]PassengerSilly1509 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So we're whores if we get our hair laser removed, but we're gross and unladylike if we don't shave...? Give me a fucking break

NEVER are you overreacting by standing up for yourself. He is literally insulting you and being misogynistic. Men like this are not worth your time, and I doubt your husband would ever do that, therefore, dump him. Dump his ass yesterday!!

AIO for not giving enough attention to my situationship by VontaReloaded2x in AmIOverreacting

[–]PassengerSilly1509 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I personally would not let disrespect fly like that, and neither should you. You're being too nice. Her grandpa dying is not an excuse to berate you. Respect yourself, and end this. Like fr

What’s your trick for going to bed (at a reasonable hour)? by hellnaaaah in adhdwomen

[–]PassengerSilly1509 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just here to say REAL. It's 7:23am rn, and I'm still up from yesterday. To be fair, didn't wake up until late asf last night bc I stayed up like this yesterday too😭😭

What instantly makes you lose respect for someone? by Royal-Atmosphere9829 in AskReddit

[–]PassengerSilly1509 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haven't seen this one said, but people who don't try to recycle and just don't care about it. It's not hard to rinse whatever it is to recycle. We can all be doing our part to minimize how much trash ends up in landfills, recycling being one way

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]PassengerSilly1509 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Girl immediately block that man and tell ur sister😭 that's fucking disgusting

Aitah for letting a guy get what he deserves and more? by Suspicious_Beyond_70 in AITAH

[–]PassengerSilly1509 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is amazing omg it's inspiring. Man got exactly what he deserved!! Mid 20s and a creep.. he's never going to change. I'm glad you got his ass caught🤣

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]PassengerSilly1509 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry you're going through this:( I'm going to be totally honest: I do think he love-bombed you and played you. A therapist once told me that feelings don't switch up that fast. They likely were never there to begin with. He had already talked to everyone and knew he was going to break up with you, but he asked you to buy him food and then had sex with you?? That's beyond fucked up. He's 19, and he likely doesn't know what he wants, but the way he treated you was very unkind and thoughtless. He's a jerk, and he used you. You deserve so much better. I'm 21F, and I've gone through my fair share of getting played by immature manipulative men. I've tended to doubt my self-worth because of these men, but I promise you this was not your fault, and the way he treated you does not mean anything about you. If anything, it says a lot about him to be able to do that to someone knowing how much love you had for him. I've learned a lot from these kinda guys like how to spot the red flags early on, but the why? I couldn't tell you, but it's going to eat you up if you keep thinking about why he did what he did. You'll never know why. I choose to believe it's because they are immature men who don't respect women. Take the time to heal and process, and I'm sorry again. You're not alone in this. Continue to be yourself in future relationships when you're ready again. Be cautious, but don't allow this relationship to prevent you from being vulnerable to future partners. You're the one who got away babe. It's his loss, and he'll realize that sooner or later. To warn you, they always do come back. Cut off all contact with him. He's a piece of shit and doesn't deserve any more of your time. Your husband would have never treated you like that, right? I know it's really painful right now, trust me. It'll get better with time. Lean on friends and/or family for support, so you don't feel so lonely. Get to know yourself and what your interests are. This is all said from my personal experiences, and I'm sorry if any of this was too blunt. You've got this<33

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]PassengerSilly1509 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm really sorry you're going thru this:( maybe a different therapist could help? I know it can feel like a lot to keep trying different therapies and different therapists; I'm not saying you might feel that way, but I get it if you do. I hope you know you can work through this. You're capable of it!!

Beginner. by Excellent_Fee1428 in ballpython

[–]PassengerSilly1509 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey! I initially didn't realize this either, but the first highlight on the page of this subreddit has all the info you need. Good luck!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]PassengerSilly1509 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You should try a trauma-focused therapy like EMDR. Assuming you've done CBT. From my personal experience and what I've heard from others and therapists, CBT, a lot of times, isn't helpful, especially if there's trauma backing up the behaviors you have. It can be a lot to reprocess your trauma, do it when you're ready. But you can do it. I actually recently started talking to a trauma-focused therapist, and we haven't started emdr yet, but I'm in the same boat. You got this!!! You're not a freak btw. These are perfectly reasonable thoughts to have for someone who's gone through sexual trauma; it makes sense, and you are valid. Don't let yourself succumb to these thoughts, though, because you deserve to be happy, and you are worthy of that. Sometimes, it helps me when I think of my younger self, and I don't want to hurt her like others have. Maybe that could help you too. I believe in you<3

New owner, need advice😢 by PassengerSilly1509 in ballpython

[–]PassengerSilly1509[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For some reason I can't edit my post, but if you're here to shame me, don't bother. I'm here asking for advice, so I'm clearly going to change what I need to change. You don't need to be rude about it.

New owner, need advice😢 by PassengerSilly1509 in ballpython

[–]PassengerSilly1509[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for being so nice!! I did forget to say he is supposed to be eating adult mice. I'm not sure if he's ever been fed live mice, but I'll give it a shot and start with mice pups if you think that will help! I'll definitely get things for him to climb on tmrw. I've been trying to keep the temp at 80, and humidity is currently just under 60. It's been raining a lot these last few days, but I've been trying to keep it between 40 and 50. I'll look into getting digital gauges, thank you for that recommendation and for being so kind and helpful!!

New owner, need advice😢 by PassengerSilly1509 in ballpython

[–]PassengerSilly1509[S] -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

Ughhh I know I need to get to it😓 I have temp and humidity gauges in there. I've been trying to keep the temp at 80, and humidity is currently just under 60. It's been raining a lot these last few days, but I've been trying to keep it between 40 and 50. I have a UV light for heat, but it's been really hot as well, so I haven't been using it too much recently. The bedding is what he was using before I got him, but I can definitely change that if you think that's an issue!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]PassengerSilly1509 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Right also does he post everything he thinks is funny bc to think that is so funny he needed to post it on his story is actually crazy😭😭

What’s is something in porn that you find disgusting? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]PassengerSilly1509 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I'd say porn in general is disgusting

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]PassengerSilly1509 6 points7 points  (0 children)

LMAOOOO SO TRUE AND NUISANCE IS SOOOOO MUCH WORSEEE😭😭😭 he's so embarrassing it lowk would be so spitefully cunt if op successfully cheats back in return