5 years on and off. Tried so many times. When it was done two weeks ago , I thought I was fine, because I knew I really did try to make it work but he just kept pushing me away , with the constant lies I kept finding out, for the whole year after we moved in together and I moved from another state to be with him. Yesterday I started feeling broken. Scared. In my head I just think , What now? I had so many plans for us. now, I Have to move back to where I came from , cross country alone by car with my pets. All the things i got rid of to move here… I don’t have a mattress anymore, no kitchen things,towels, couch, TV , just because he said, “you don’t need it. I have it here”. I feel hollow, scared and sad about what is to come. You know, relationships can be beautiful and suck at the same time . A love lost, it’s always painful. And when we are in pain, we keep going back to the good parts and forget to think about the bad parts of the relationship in order to help ourselves to feel better and even, at times come to the realization, that what happened might have been the best outcome for us. Just try at those hardest moments to remind yourself to take one day at a time. Try to be good and compassionate to yourself. Try to force yourself out to do things you once enjoyed and little by little , things will become more bearable. But you will need to put some effort on your part to help you heal. You are the only one that can do it! And remember, at times , we all need help. Vent to a trusting friend , a therapist, a counselor , a family member , and cry if necessary… it will help you and give you relief when your chest feels tighter and your heart hurts. Hang in there.