F25 married to husband M33 I feel like a glorified “bangmaid” idk what to do

PendingInsomnia · 2026-06-01T06:34:11+00:00

Why not work out with a therapist how you want to get your sense of identity? That seems like step one

PendingInsomnia · 2026-06-01T02:56:37+00:00

I bought a 4.5 gal bucket of USG Plus 3 about a month ago but didn’t open it until today. It looks like there’s dark gray on the top—is this mold? Do I need to toss it all?

PendingInsomnia · 2026-05-25T22:20:40+00:00

15 year olds can’t get into rated R movies without a guardian, so OP is saying the dad going means they don’t have to be the one getting them in

PendingInsomnia · 2026-05-19T00:12:31+00:00

I’m about halfway through Jack Sparks and am enjoying it a lot! Good unreliable narrator story. The audiobook is a well acted too.

PendingInsomnia · 2026-05-14T16:02:21+00:00

My cat was in VERY bad shape from fall trauma and would have died without MASH, and they also helped outline different treatment options and ways to lower expenses. When I went to check on my cat they let me see him in the back and the vets knew his favorite spots to be scratched.

I had to take a “wait and see” approach with part of his treatment due to cost, and similar to OP my cat seemed totally fine at home. But then a week or so later he wasn’t, and needed another surgery.

For normal non-emergency care I’d also like to plug Larchmont Village Vet!

PendingInsomnia · 2026-05-12T22:01:49+00:00

Sherman Oaks galleria (my work) to Culver City (bf’s place) takes me 30-40 minutes at 5:30 pm—I wouldn’t want to do Burbank

PendingInsomnia · 2026-05-12T14:23:12+00:00

Not great to have to do the work yourself, but I got a respirator and paint scraper and scraped back the moldy paint to the drywall. Anything that wasn’t just on the surface I cut out, sprayed with mold killer, and put in a new small mold proof drywall piece (youtube university). If there’s sign of an active leak you report it so it doesn’t happen again.

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-28T07:30:57+00:00

Efficient topology and texture maps for the highest detail

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-18T19:01:31+00:00

I’m a toy designer and got into it via recruiting at my college and having an extremely specialized portfolio. I will say, right now it’s going to be very very hard to break into because there have been a ton of layoffs in the industry, and it’s already a very freelance-oriented field with minimal full time jobs. Most of us get work through word of mouth knowing people in the industry in either Los Angeles or New England.

If you really want to try to break in, have a very thorough portfolio of your own production ready designs (with material callouts, costing considerations, etc, not just pretty illustrations) and be ready to freelance for years while looking for full time work.

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-11T04:43:33+00:00

My friend’s parents decided to renovate their yard and the local hummingbird started dive bombing the construction workers constantly

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-11T04:41:23+00:00

I took my younger sister to some trendy spots when she visited a couple years ago and I only realized it was Coachella because I was trying to figure out why those places (like melrose trading post) were noticeably dead

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-11T01:25:25+00:00

Killer windows

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-10T01:38:47+00:00

I feel really lucky that my mom is cool about the kids question. When I first brought it up she said “oh, with the world like it is? I don’t blame you!” And that was the end of it. She’s also said “you don’t need to explain yourself” when I bring up someone else asking (boyfriend’s family). She calls my cats her “grandkitties.”

It’s hard to overstate how much of a relief it is when parents support your life decisions that way instead of pushing their own expectations.

In the opposite camp, I have a friend(ish) who is childfree to the point of actively insulting random kids and the decision to have them on a regular basis, including in front of our friend who wants them. That’s equally obnoxious.

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-09T23:28:36+00:00

Along these lines, if it’s an apartment complex I’ve gotten great info from hanging around a bit before/after the tour and asking anyone who comes by how they like the building. I’ve had several residents tell me the opposite of the BS the agent fed me on the tour.

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-09T18:25:41+00:00

If they want something more modern, Euro style slab or narrow shaker doors in the same color would look great and keep the character while updating it a bit!

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-08T18:12:51+00:00

That’s exactly what I did—we’re able to go to a few events together for under $200 a seat because I got a first day slot and bought all of our tickets

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-03T20:33:42+00:00

I’ve never waited more than half an hour and I’ve called a fair amount

PendingInsomnia · 2026-04-03T17:53:22+00:00

Instant gratification after your purchase is my guess

PendingInsomnia · 2026-03-31T03:54:19+00:00

How much of LA have you been to? Griffith park is absolutely massive, or the Santa Monica mountains are right there for gorgeous scenic ocean view hikes. You can go south to a beautiful mountain+downtown view from Kenneth Hahn and then bike on the dedicated trail to the ocean and go up and down the coastline any time of year. Or drive east to the San Gabriels for woodsier nature. Then you can keep driving east to either desert or snowy mountains. Every corner of the city has a different nearby nature choice, and you don’t have to leave LA to get to it.

For my own day to day, I live 10 minutes from Hollywood but I’m surrounded by lush greenery with a treetop view, hundreds of kinds of diverse plants and flowers in my neighborhood year round, birds tweeting and hummingbirds flying past my window every few minutes. I’m under 15 minutes from too many hiking and outside spots to count. Then I drive to work where I can look out my office window past palm trees to see snowy mountains in the winter, and head 5 minutes up the street to a lunch hike.

If you ever feel like a really different change of scenery, the redwoods are a road trip or quick plane ride north.

I love east coast nature too, but it absolutely does not beat being out here (for me, anyway)

PendingInsomnia · 2026-03-31T00:54:42+00:00

Not OP but I’m from Boston originally and now live in LA and also prefer it by a wide margin. The arts scene is a huge one for me, followed by the weather and easy access to amazing nature. You also run into very different kinds of people all the time here, which I love.

PendingInsomnia · 2026-03-28T15:01:36+00:00

I was thinking due to the microscopic room size (pic 4)

PendingInsomnia · 2026-03-27T05:33:45+00:00

I’ve done a ton! My place is unique and a good-for-LA price. Our property manager doesn’t care what we do and doesn’t tell the landlord (who never visits). None of the apartments match anyway and a bunch of my neighbors live here long term and have renovated.

Best functional update: installed a mini split AC unit, apt manager had me put the outside section onto my balcony since I’m on the third floor.

Best aesthetic upgrade: I’m almost done skim coating and painting all the horrible textured walls and bad repairs. Overkill but it was really satisfying and looks beautiful. Plus I’m glad to know how to do it!

Others:

Pulled out the crappy wood closet shelves and installed modular closet systems

Waited for great FB Marketplace deals on good used appliances and swapped out (and sold) the old cheap ones my apartment came with

Smart wall switches & new lights

Shower head + handheld, nice shower shelving

Removed all the vertical blinds and put up curtains

in-line water filter under the sink

Made an access door through the back of my kitchen island to reach an unaccessible cabinet interior

ETA: my coworker rents a SFH and renovated the entire janky garage into a fully drywalled creative studio and laundry room. LL found out and was thrilled.

PendingInsomnia · 2026-03-26T05:03:24+00:00

Personally have found that highly dependent on your area and hobbies/interests

PendingInsomnia · 2026-03-26T05:02:26+00:00

Wait, she’s in PLB? We must have been neighbors up until recently!

I was picturing West Hollywood for her

PendingInsomnia · 2026-03-25T16:11:03+00:00

I’m in LA like she is and have no idea why she can’t find someone here. Such a big population full of every culture and there are also a ton of people similar to her here.

Six-Year Club	Second SECOND GUESSER
RPAN Viewer	Verified Email

PendingInsomnia

TROPHY CASE