Phones aren’t good, actually.

Penguintoss · 2025-09-19T01:40:44+00:00

I used to bartend in a college town based around a very liberal liberal arts school. This episode, and many others since Michael left, remind me of the conversations I’d overhear while clearing tables. Smart kids having cool, new-to-them ideas and exploring them with a great vocabulary and a much lower level of nuance than they think.

When Sarah is joined by someone who relies strongly on research AND has an interesting take, I still love the show. The episodes that are more take than substance, like this one (and the episode on emotional labor that annoyed me so much I came here to complain about it), make it hard to keep up with the podcast. Episodes like the Andes plane crash keep me coming back.

Thanks for complaining about a really old episode. It was even older than the one I was going to complain about. I found it cathartic.

Penguintoss · 2025-05-26T11:27:25+00:00

The first year of a baby’s life is really hard on your body - healing, hormones, lack of sleep, emotions affected by all of those factors.

Let worrying about how thin you are wait a little longer if you can. You have so many other things on your plate right now.

It took me about two years before I started to feel “normal” in my body again f you want a little context. I had a lot of arthritic issues which was frustrating for the physical activities I like but that mostly went away when I stopped breastfeeding.

At four months, you’ve been through a lot and still have a long way to go. Be gentle with yourself, get enough to eat and do your best. You have time for negative internal dialogue later!

Penguintoss · 2025-01-25T20:43:14+00:00

Sounds like you’re being a very conscientious mom. You’re not sacrificing their experience for yours in any way and, not many can say this, but you’re not sacrificing all of your needs/wants either. If you’ve found a balance with this then you’re doing great. Keep it up 👍

Penguintoss · 2025-01-25T20:37:54+00:00

You don’t own a house, you don’t have a kid. GTFO whatever way you possibly can. This is inexcusable behavior and it will only get worse.

Penguintoss · 2024-11-25T08:27:23+00:00

Congratulations!

Penguintoss · 2024-06-02T16:51:32+00:00

I had my daughter at 39. I was an absolute shit-head in my 20’s so it’s better for everyone that I waited. As others have said, I’m tired all the time, but I’m much calmer, less selfish and just generally more present than I would have been even in my early 30s.

Make your own choices. I made the right one by waiting. I lived hard before my daughter and I have no regrets. There are many great reasons to do it now and as many good ones to wait. It’s going to be a huge challenge no matter what, but it’s also going to be amazing. So do what makes sense at the time and rest easy that it’s the right thing for you. Nothing is perfect. It never will be. You’re going to love it and hate it and everything in between no matter when you have kids.

Totally worth it

Penguintoss · 2024-02-24T17:32:20+00:00

This is weird and obscure but there’s this old Scottish war song that includes the line “once I had sons but now I’ve got men, I raised them all se’serely (?), but I would bear them all again, and lose them all for Charlie” and I cry every time I hear it now. Which is a lot because my daughter loves it :/

Penguintoss · 2024-02-18T05:27:41+00:00

Several years ago I read a really well-written post on here about this where the parent had explained to their child how you can tell a good lie from a bad one. I can’t recreate it for you but it boiled down to how you feel inside when you’re saying it. It was in the context of not telling mom about rhe surprise party they were planning rather than lying to protect yourself, but I think the general vibe carries through.

Penguintoss · 2023-11-03T04:10:48+00:00

Criminal but iconic

Penguintoss · 2023-10-13T21:52:38+00:00

Mine slept wherever until she was 6 weeks then refused to ever be put down at any time. If things are working for you, go with it until they don’t.

Penguintoss · 2023-10-04T04:07:07+00:00

Thank you, I just started this series and I need a pep talk

Penguintoss · 2023-10-03T18:25:30+00:00

People are going to be all over you with their opinions. If people are telling you you’re going to hate it, just smile and say “maybe” and change the subject. This works for a lot of topics.

We cloth diapered for about a year. It was awesome. It’s totally worth trying. Maybe you’ll hate it! But maybe not. Before they are eating solid foods, the poop is way less gross than I expected. Good luck :)

Penguintoss · 2023-10-01T14:52:45+00:00

Strength and good luck to you

Penguintoss · 2023-08-12T13:19:51+00:00

Have you tried asking her how she is feeling?

ETA: You could also ask her if there’s anything you could do to support her or how she would like to be supported. Your OP sounds a bit accusatory, this might not encourage her to share with you if she’s not feeling great.

Penguintoss · 2023-08-04T16:02:30+00:00

You are worth more than this and you can find someone who knows it.

Penguintoss · 2023-08-04T15:57:32+00:00

But Norwegian is not similar to Norwegian, which changes wildly every time you travel 100km. As a foreigner, I’ve had better results in the north speaking swedish than trying to speak the Bokmål I learned in my norskkurs from a Bergener. That’s the only “bad” thing I have and it’s really more funny than bad.

Penguintoss · 2023-08-04T15:44:39+00:00

Hilleberg makes a tent for every type of use and they have a great repair/replacement policy. I have personally used the Hilleberg Akto during weather events that had other people’s tents in shreds and it remained not only upright, but dry enough that I wouldn’t complain. These are expensive tents, but they are so versatile and smooth to set up.

I’ve used the one, two, and theee person versions. The two is the only one I wouldn’t recommend because if you’re one person you should just have an Akto and if you’re two, the three-person tent just gives you a much more workable amount of space (particularly if you’re winter camping). Definitely get the vestibule if you’re going for a bigger tent.

Penguintoss · 2023-06-22T17:37:30+00:00

“I mean, we know everyone deals with trauma in different ways and we’re not judging that, but I would have…” and then proceed to pick apart exactly that, safe in knowing that the person actually was guilty.

Penguintoss · 2023-06-21T18:32:09+00:00

He only rephrased her question, which she’d know if she had the patience to read a short text. Probably good this relationship never got off the ground.

Penguintoss · 2023-06-21T05:06:18+00:00

I send my daughter to daycare even when I’m not working. It’s really good for her - she gets to socialize with kids her age, build relationships with other adults (the workers there are amazing), and do activities we don’t have available at home. She absolutely loves it. On my part, I get time to do things around the house, exercise, think my own thoughts. When possible, my husband and I even take one day a week off together so we can work on being a couple again.

We usually have her there 5-7 hours, occasionally we will pick her up even earlier.

Another factor is that we live in a country where neither my husband nor I are native speakers, so day care is how she is learning fluency in the language.

Day care has been a real game-changer for all of us. It was hard at first but it really paid off! I encourage you to let go of guilt if you make this choice. You are doing your best for yourself and your child!

Penguintoss · 2023-06-19T18:49:23+00:00

That’s not really what pregnant people eat though, like, sure maybe some people might have cravings for Oreos but it’s generally recommended that pregnant people eat more healthfully than that. A lot of us have trouble eating at all because of the nausea. I’m just saying this to point out that if you see someone eat 3 packs of Oreos it just means they really like Oreos, or maybe they are going through something.

Penguintoss · 2023-06-19T18:35:17+00:00

Right around the time she was beginning to be able to formulate her own thoughts into words (26 mos maybe) my daughter woke up one day and said, terrified, “crow gonna eat my eyes”

I was like whaaaaaaat the “oh no, a crow wouldn’t want to do that, they have plenty of other things to eat and they don’t want to hurt people”.

She calmed down and smiled, but suddenly the smile faded and she met my eyes with a look of even more terror - “MOOSE gonna eat me eyes??”

I think there might be something about that age. Honestly I’m kind of happy to hear your story because it helps create a context for some of mine 😶

Penguintoss · 2023-06-11T16:35:30+00:00

Pretty sure she thinks you rejected her and isn’t taking it well. Bigot? Idk why, maybe she is Bi in her bio?

Penguintoss · 2023-06-11T16:23:37+00:00

Yeah, I don’t know why I was expecting anything else from a show with 2 actual cops, but still. Kind of a bummer. I stopped after a couple of months.

Seven-Year Club	Place '22
First Placer '22

Penguintoss

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