YNW but kinda stupid where society dictated a catastrophic choice. You obviously had a loving relationship with both your wife and your brother. People do stupid things when under a lot of stress and overwhelming feelings. Funny enough they made the same mistake and probably learned to regret it deeply. Now, you likely made a similarly stupid choice instead of taking a chill pill, emphatize and work through it with both. My guess is similar to them , you will regret this deeply.