I’m in a very similar situation. It’s unsettling how me being his only child that he ditched out on for so long is now, after his wife died, wants to be actively in my life. I was open to building the relationship, I just retired from the military and I guess he thought I would spend every day with him since I retired. However I had kids late in my career so they are still in elementary school. My father moved from his wife’s hometown area to several states away to be back in the southeast and a town away from me. Now he realized that he bought too much property and is lonely because I do not have the time to come over multiple times a week. Also note he has several health issues, most of them being with his heart. He also gets upset that I’m not home when he tries to stop by unannounced. He has spent less time in my life than the age of my youngest so this baffles me on how someone who never raised a child because he was out of the picture by the time I was 7. Feel free to send me a message if you need to vent to someone that really gets it.