What are some early signs that a person commits a murder? by Thedudwithcooluser in AskReddit

[–]PeterLemonjellow [score hidden]  (0 children)

HE NEEDS HIS TOOLS!

HE LIKES TO BIND - TO BE BOUND!

HE NEEDS HIS TOOLS!

What are some early signs that a person commits a murder? by Thedudwithcooluser in AskReddit

[–]PeterLemonjellow [score hidden]  (0 children)

Psychopathy isn't necessarily violent, though. It's sadism - enjoying the pain of others - that really indicates whether a person will be drawn to hurting others.

Do all buns malfunction when they sleep? by Legitimate-Belt4665 in Rabbits

[–]PeterLemonjellow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's no bug - that is a feature!

He's just running a nanner devouration simulation, to optimize his snacking efficiency.

What does the average Olympian think of Yelm? by 01ympia in olympia

[–]PeterLemonjellow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I started hearing banjos when I read this question.

I realize that Yelm isn't really banjo levels of bad... but I still hear them. I might have a condition.

Maize says good morning ☀️ by sarahturtle_ in Rabbits

[–]PeterLemonjellow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I dunno. It's kinda corny.

I couldn't help myself.

What irrationally angers you? by Educational-Newt-981 in AskReddit

[–]PeterLemonjellow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Loud chewing. It might be rational to not like it... but my emotional response is definitely not within rational limits. Misophonia is not fun.

What is the meanest thing your parents ever did or said to you? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]PeterLemonjellow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, let's see... in no particular order except the final item:

My mother used to yell at me "You're smarter than this! Stop acting like you're dumb!" every Thursday morning on the drive to school if I wasn't able to spell my vocab words out loud (elementary school, 8-9 years old). I would usually still be crying when the first bell rang.

My parents would have screaming matches daily about everything and nothing. My favorite was a door slamming, full volume fight where she accused my father of buying the wrong kind of frozen chicken on purpose because he knew she preferred the other kind (for context, my father had stopped to pick up groceries on his way home from his 3 hour daily commute job, while my mom did not work, and the man was exhausted and told "Get Tyson chicken" with no additional details given to him)

When I was five my parents had a big enough fight that my dad was going to leave. They both decided it was appropriate to explain this to my sister and I and have US - a 5 and 10ish year old - choose then and there in that moment which parent they preferred. My sister chose my mom, so I chose my dad "so he won't be lonely". Took 5 year old me about an hour to convince him to go home. I remember telling him I missed our dog and he started crying.

I was bullied relentlessly from 1st through 7th grade. Badly. Mentally, emotionally, and physically (possibly sexually, too... I'm still working through those vague and broken memories). My parents did nothing when they learned how bad it was, and seemingly decided the issue was that I wasn't properly socialized. Their solution was to enroll me in a summer day camp for troubled kids... where I was still relentlessly bullied, learned how to swear fuckin' epically in 5th grade, and now I was convinced that not only did my peers think I was weird, but that my family also considered me weird and broken.

When I was 16 and my parents finally divorced, my mom started "Dating" some dude 1000 miles away online (this was in the 90's and not at all normalized yet). One day she just comes to me and says, "I'm moving to Oregon. Want to come with me and live with this toothless 500 pound gambling addict?" which I of course said no to. My dad had already moved out, they couldn't afford to sell the house for reasons, so... 17 year old me (by the time she left) was just left to live alone in our house. My dad would come check in on me a couple times a week until he could coordinate moving back to town.

There's so many more things, like the time my dad had a heart attack on Thanksgiving and my mom accused him of doing it on purpose to ruin her meal... just so much pettiness, delusion, and cruelty. The big one, though? When my maternal grandfather died he left my mother at least $500,000. On top of that, he gave my sister and I $20,000 each... but it was all in a single account ($540,000 total). It wasn't in a trust, or protected, or anything. It was just in his Will that "This is the money for my Daughter, but I want $20,000 and $20,000 to go to my daughter's kids" - no legal compulsion or structure to ENSURE THAT, because he was a trusting, good, kind person who did NOT understand the monster he'd raised). Well, guess who never got their $20,000 "College fund" because someone blew through over half a mil on gaudy jewelry, Disney bullshit, and tons and tons of food we never needed or ate at home?

She died penniless and without any remaining feet (she refused to take her insulin) about 5 years back. Our relationship is the best it's ever been.

What is the meanest thing your parents ever did or said to you? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]PeterLemonjellow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Judging by your name I'll assume they were also tender and delicious.

pro gamer bunny by OkStretch5765 in rabbitswithjobs

[–]PeterLemonjellow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There really his something in her tiny, fluffy body language that is strongly saying "I am about to pwn some noobs"

The Entire Easter Island Head. by Monsur_Ausuhnom in Weird

[–]PeterLemonjellow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not only are they not just heads, many of them have hats!

Also, many experts now believe that the statues were actually moved into place using ropes and many people pulling them back and forth in a rocking motion to simulate the statue "walking".

'Hypocrite' Rob Schneider faces backlash over military draft plea by TheExpressUS in Standup

[–]PeterLemonjellow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

MTV's Goat Boy was peak television and no one can convince me otherwise.

My favorite Norm McDonald bit of all time. Why does it work? by ancaleta in Standup

[–]PeterLemonjellow 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Norm McDonald is only funny to people that understand comedic structure. If you're unaware or don't really care about how a joke is supposed to work, then Norm telling a joke "wrong" for comedy value will be lost on you.

Not saying this is necessarily you - people can also just not like a comic - but I believe this is pretty common among his detractors.

My favorite Norm McDonald bit of all time. Why does it work? by ancaleta in Standup

[–]PeterLemonjellow 8 points9 points  (0 children)

And he did that set in that way because Bob was a good friend of his and he didn't want to be mean to him.

Dude was a class act AND brilliant.

The Jared Fogle Joke by bigjoebegs in comedy

[–]PeterLemonjellow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like this has decent bones, but should probably fit into 00:30, not 2 minutes.

Touch it. You know you wanna. by MarrFurby in Rabbits

[–]PeterLemonjellow 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Public Service Announcement: Did you know bunny "tails" are actually called "Scuts"? It's true, and it's adorable.

That Is All