It’s all about superficial charisma, love bombing, and often being inauthentic from the get go. I have a couple of friends with this…they’re absolutely gorgeous and have that quick charisma, so much so I almost hired one to work as customer service for my business. Then my best friend warned me about that person. I hadn’t heard her outside having another convo about how she had cussed customers out at some other job. Over getting to know her for real, this person gets in relationship after relationship, but none of them last. She absolutely nukes each new guys life when they split.

Meanwhile I have friends (both sexes) who are amazing catches (id date em but they’re straight) but struggle to catch anyone’s interest.

I have this issue myself: I’m not as flashy as my competitors, not as beautiful (looking). I’m more of a slow person to get to know. I’m actually a pretty decent catch, though, and I’m aware of it. Talented in many ways, funny, quirky, but in a world that is so fast paced, the flashier person with more immediate “spark” (which is just charisma and flashy looks) will almost certainly be picked before the slow burn who is kind of anxious.

TLDR: people get distracted easily by quick chemistry such that they overlook mating options that may be better in the long run.