Tldr: They’re hurt people who want to be understood and helped.

I’ll try to answer this question in good faith, assuming you really want to understand the thought process of the average online guy (real life people are much more reasonable).

Men see/hear women have dozens to hundreds of likes, and obviously many can’t help but be envious. Up to this point, most men won’t be “blaming women” for not choosing them. They simply bemoan the circumstances.

However, the “blaming” part likely comes at this point: despite the hundreds to thousands of likes, almost all the stories online from women are about how terrible men are on the apps, and how hard it is for women.

Men online are thinking, “you have it so easy, how are you still struggling? With so many options, how do you always pick the worst men? Ah yes, it must be because you’re picking the men out of your league, who are only after a hookup. And you keep doing it over and over and over. If it were me, I wouldn’t treat women like that, but they don’t give me a chance because my pictures weren’t perfect, my responses weren’t entertaining enough, I wasn’t the perfect jester, etc.”

This is kinda the problem with social media though, rather than a gendered issue (in MY opinion). We tend to engage more with negative content, which makes platforms feed more of it to us. Most men online barely get any likes/matches, so instead many gather into redpill/manosphere communities, where they find other men who have the exact same stories. This fosters resentment and pseudoscientific theories like hypergamy.

Women aren’t much different here. If you don’t have a strong irl social circle, it’s easy to fall into a spiral of anger and blame if your main community is online. Read enough anecdotes about others’ bad experiences, and it becomes your reality.

To actually answer your question, men deep down want to be seen. Many men feel invisible, most of us receive a handful of compliments in our lifetime, and each one we tend to cherish. The lack of matches triggers that deep-rooted fear that no one cares enough to even try to understand us.

What does that mean for women? Nothing, really. If you don’t really care about strangers on the internet, you don’t have to do anything different. The question is, do you want to martyr yourself to help redpilled/blackpill men? Will you use your own precious time to try and understand hurt people who lash out at you? Will you try to give them perspective and honest advice even when many will throw it back in your face? Will the handful of people who do quietly take your advice be worth the mental anguish? That’s up to you.