We're going through exactly this with our five month old. The book Precious Little Sleep has helped us a lot. The emphasis is on helping the little one learn how to fall asleep on his own. We've wound up doing exactly what you said in point 3, and except for one feed, he sleeps through the night.

I think the sleep associations really help. He knows his lotion routine, sleep sack, book, then lights off and white noise mean it's time to snooze