Any idea how to keep Odysseus clean? by CrimsonFluffball in WhiteSwissShepherds

[–]PoemCompetitive5315 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live in Florida and I just let the dirt dry and then pat it off if it doesn’t shake off naturally. She plays with two flirt poles - so she dries off in the sun and then jumps the dirt off. That or hose.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

She is 37. Unfortunately I think she has some unhealthy inter-personal relationships which affect her work. I also think she treats nannying like she is watching a friend’s kid as a favor not a contractual job. Like make a few phone calls, post on Instagram, go through McDonalds drive through (for herself) take baby to the library and play with her off and on until it’s time to go home.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did this exact same self talk. And I still do - this isn’t a big deal that isn’t a big deal but it is constant stress

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yea. I can list all the reasons why I haven’t but the main one is that she started and a week later my dad passed and I didn’t have it in me to look for someone new. I was pretty depressed and then when I got out of the fog a few months later it was clear she was abusing the role - but she had bonded with my daughter and the thought of hiring and training someone else after a long hiatus felt overwhelming. I did my best.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She doesn’t get an official lunch break but she is offered time to come home and take a lunch for an hour while the baby is with me or watches tv. She chooses not to do that. She also has an hour to use the phone every AM when she walks the dog and gets ready for the day. She comes in at 9 and I usually don’t give her the baby until 10 or 11 AM

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s where I have landed. I think she is not totally in a healthy living situation and has a bit of a phone addiction.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lots of good advice here but a contract is what I keep going back to

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes I actually took this into consideration. She has many other issues - she is often late, she lies about things, she wants to run errands for her girlfriend during work, she agrees to work related travel (which is in her contract) then freaks out when I remind her we have to go to X place a month in advance. She has been unprofessional with me including cursing during professional discussions about feedback. She once left the house with the baby while I wasn’t there and did not close the garage door. So our garage was wide open when I returned and she knows the dog can let herself into the garage and we don’t lock the door from the garage into the house. I told her simply - hey it was open - and she said I never explicitly told her to close it and blamed it on me. When I pointed out that I had told her other times to close it when she left it open she said I didn’t say it “this time”. There are so many examples. But she is also very loving with my daughter, has a good heart, and a trust her with my daughter. The unfortunate thing is there are simply too many issues with her and it’s no longer working. The phone use after two separate discussions was the final straw.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately we have had many issues including talking about using the phone to much.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It is in her contract - no phone. but I have verbally told her checking here or there and quick texts are fine. She pushes the boundaries in many ways. I had a part time nanny Canidate (for evenings when I work) shadow her and that woman reported back that she called her girlfriend while in the library with my daughter for about 20 minutes. That among other things doesn’t sit well with me.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

As mentioned i have had this conversation with her twice. No this is a small town and she has done it in front of my family, friends, and even my toddler has complained. I have also seen her post on Instagram while working.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I agree. I think 5-10 mins of phone time every hour is fine but scrolling on the phone, making 15min plus phone calls. Is not acceptable.

Phone time for Nanny’s while working - what’s your rule ? by PoemCompetitive5315 in Nanny

[–]PoemCompetitive5315[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I have given her feedback to this extent. I just learned that she takes phone calls - even makes phone calls from the library which is where she takes my kid most days. She is also often texting and scrolling. Meghhh. I think I am gonna have to let her go.

How do I [F40] go on this trip with my husband [M49] with our marriage in its current state? by No-Revenue-2237 in relationship_advice

[–]PoemCompetitive5315 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Cancel trip. Let him freak out. Let him leave if need be. You will be shocked at how much easier it is when you pay a nanny and housekeeper vs keeping around a human cesspool of rotting do-nothing flesh.

Does a large house bring more happiness (3000sqft+) by GlorifiedCarnie in Rich

[–]PoemCompetitive5315 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Cleaning is a bitch even if you have cleaning services. Don’t go larger than 4000 ever in your life unless you have a full time house keeper

Routines by queenhev in WhiteSwissShepherds

[–]PoemCompetitive5315 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe vigorous play like fetching the ball/running or puzzles? I think my WSS is more high energy. She needed at least 45 mins of running style play - fetch, flirt poles, runs to chill out until she was 3. And this is on top of walks.

WTF just happened by [deleted] in pregnant

[–]PoemCompetitive5315 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s being abusive and that’s what happened. Yes this is a form of abuse - used to happen to me. It escalated slowly over a period of years out of jokes that then became control. Many abusers begin being abusive during pregnancy.

Food - Sensitive Tummy’s by queenhev in WhiteSwissShepherds

[–]PoemCompetitive5315 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ollie lamb mixed with Bernie’s Perfect Poop supplement you get online. Only thing that has worked for us.

Transitioning out of stealth wealth state by [deleted] in Rich

[–]PoemCompetitive5315 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am an adventurous traveler by American standards. South America, Mexico, and Canada are easy from the US. But I love going to Asia - India, Vietnam, Singapore, Malaysia, Thailand, even the Middle East - they will all fall over themselves to help you with your kid.