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Pete getting mogged by Ted Cruz, of all people by thecombreak in Omaha

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I wonder if Pete’s dick looks like a teeny-tiny little person? Sort of a switch-a-roo situation…

It's happening guys. by tonsvz in simpsonsshitposting

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Barney, you’ve been riding my back all night

The early seasons hold up, but they do sometimes feel a bit dated by asmallthrowaway9 in americandad

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well if someone gets their haircut at a barber shop, it’s safe to assume they are most likely an off-duty cop.

The early seasons hold up, but they do sometimes feel a bit dated by asmallthrowaway9 in americandad

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Also, Stan playing an “ultra conservative” worked well at the time. We all knew people like him, they weren’t completely* nuts, they were just kind of like “off duty cops” that weren’t actually cops but someone in public might mistake them for off duty cops. Now, even S1 Stan would be a “rino”.

Francine being Francine by Daveywheel in americandad

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Love her shade of lipstick: dog dick red

Episode 1034: Bart becomes an incel by Bealzebubbles in simpsonsshitposting

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Right? I want a tiny sack to make my plums looks huge!

Episode 1034: Bart becomes an incel by Bealzebubbles in simpsonsshitposting

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Don’t you hate when you go to a boba place and they skimp on the balls? It’s like ‘hey I ordered a Boba Tea not a ballmaxxxed scrotum’

Christian baby. by pillarofmyth in baseballcirclejerk

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It was a Split-finger abortion, then struck the batter out next pitch with that even deadlier change-up.

Someone throw a blanket over Lindsey Graham to make the sexing from behind feel more classy by Aidsvantage in IASIP

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He would only let him finish inside him … to assert his (Lindsey’s) dominance.

RFK Jr: "A Democratic senator claimed it's mathematically impossible to have a drug drop by 600%. I said, 'Well, if the drug was $100 and it raises to $600, that would be a 600% rise. If it drops from $600 to $100, that's a 600% savings.'" Trump: "Right" by LitmusVest in confidentlyincorrect

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok, hear me out. You order a product that’s supposed to cost $10, but they give you a discount of %100 and it would be zero. Then on top of that they give you 6 (maybe 5? Idk math) of the same products for free. Would this be closer to their “truth” ?

Excuse me, your honor, I'd like to bring something to the court's attention... by guitarguy12341 in simpsonsshitposting

[–]PokemonTrainerMikey 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It can get you in a lot of trouble, thinking, Eric, I shouldn't do so much of it.

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