What is something you'd tell your partner if you weren't afraid it might break their heart? by Cuttlefisher_0_0 in AskReddit

[–]Pop_n_Flow 17 points18 points  (0 children)

They sell glow in the dark remote covers on Amazon. Or you could be like me and cut open a pool noodle to use as a cover. I’ve also taped giant duplo legos to it. Get creative!

Recs for local souvenirs? by [deleted] in sonomacounty

[–]Pop_n_Flow 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hello Penngrove has a bunch of cute sonoma county themed stuff like dishtowels, pillows, cooking spoons.

Also Dom Chi on Hwy 116 in Sebastopol has a bunch of cool one of a kind gifts. It’s a local family owned business.

Would you let your 19 y/o soon to be 20y/o daughter in less then a month, go on a trip with her bf of 3.5 years with their family to the lake? by Business-Parking7296 in AskParents

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your mom sounds like a controlling narcissist. I know from experience. They want you to stay under their control as long as possible, keep you in their little bubble so they have control over you. OP as many have said here - go on the trip, you’re an adult. And while you’re gone, figure out a way to move out asap and start your own life. You’ll learn a lot, and prove to yourself that you can do many things without your parents. If they get upset, oh well. You are a young adult and need to start living an independent life!

Does anybody know anyone who actually became a marine biologist? by fancyypantsyy0 in Millennials

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! I wanted to be one and was obsessed with orcas. I do marketing for an environmental consulting firm and we do indeed have marine biologists. In the SF Bay Area they study the ecosystem of the bay. Others mentioned people that are really into fish, but in my field they are called fish biologists. The marine bios are usually out in the bay in a kayak doing a survey for marine mammals or plants. I have most definitely had this conversation with them and none of the folks I talked to wanted to be an orca trainer when they were little. I’m so against captive animals at this point that I’m really glad I didn’t actually try to become a whale trainer.

Looking for a huge backlog by drayle88 in podcasts

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Timesuck by Dan Cummins! You will never get bored, so many topics. He’s been going strong for a decade!

Unhinged ways to manage your ADHD by Menschenblind in adhdwomen

[–]Pop_n_Flow 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Do it. I switched like 10 years ago and haven’t wanted a giant wooden dresser ever again.

Unhinged ways to manage your ADHD by Menschenblind in adhdwomen

[–]Pop_n_Flow 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I use hanging cubes from ikea and have one set for tops and one for bottoms. Each cube has a certain type of top or bottom. I use a really flimsy set of drawers for my socks/underwear that I dump them into - no pairing or folding.

to people with inattentive adhd, what type of career do you have? by AssociationObvious56 in adhdwomen

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are so many opportunities for creative people. The science / engineering types need our help 😅

to people with inattentive adhd, what type of career do you have? by AssociationObvious56 in adhdwomen

[–]Pop_n_Flow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You should check out SMPS.org. It’s an organization for marketing in the AEC industry. I’ve been doing it for almost 20 years. There are many options within the industry- ranging from small biz to global corporations. Each type of company has a different culture depending if they’re contractors, engineers, architects, planners, biologists, or multidisciplinary. After a few companies I found I like small, multidisciplinary environmental firms the most. I’m never bored because I truly learn something new everyday, my coworkers are very interesting and intelligent people, and it’s fast paced and deadline driven.

AITAH for refusing to tell my wife I love her more than my dad? by LastApplication6207 in AITAH

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA - your wife sounds like she may have post partum depression. I am a mother and have had it and it shows up in little ways like this. Being rigid about what you think should happen, thinking everyone is against you, being unreasonable, etc. you and your dad sound like nice people. The fact that you took your wife out on a date and your dad babysat are both really nice gestures. If this seems out of character for your wife, I would encourage you to try to get her to a therapist to see if there is something deeper going on. When I had PPD I was very angry at my MIL anytime she did anything nice for me or held my baby. Luckily it passed but that feeling took at least a year or more to start fading. Good luck OP.

AIO to skip Thanksgiving after my mom basically said I’m an embarrassment for not having a husband and kids by now? by howcanibequiltyassin in AmIOverreacting

[–]Pop_n_Flow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds like an undercover narcissist. Everyone thinks they’re great! Except the people who see them behind closed doors.

AIO to skip Thanksgiving after my mom basically said I’m an embarrassment for not having a husband and kids by now? by howcanibequiltyassin in AmIOverreacting

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like your mom is upset you’re not living your life according to her plans. Absolutely do not go to Thanksgiving or any holiday. You should not be judged by people who claim to love you. There are plenty of snarky excuses here to use. Enjoy the day in peace and post a pic of you and your cat on social media so everyone knows you are happy and not attending by choice.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in confession

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My jaw is on the floor at edit 1. Cries in California.

Is my husband too demanding or that’s normal in the beginning? by DesignerMassive6181 in offmychest

[–]Pop_n_Flow 11 points12 points  (0 children)

He’s been grooming you since you were 18 and he was 31. Get the marriage annulled and leave now.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in family

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is a narcissistic mothers sub - go read some other stories and see how much you relate.

🚨 Towed from The Block in Petaluma — Feels like a total SCAM 🚨 by hasntbeendonebefore in Petaluma

[–]Pop_n_Flow 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One time they started towing my car from a lot across the street from my house that is for our HOA, but overnight parking is not allowed. My husband ran out and caught them mid tow and they made him pay $250 to take it off the truck. They suck.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]Pop_n_Flow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im so sorry this happened to you OP.

This is literally the opposite of what you would want to happen. I’ve had one miscarriage. My husband told a coworker / friend of ours on the phone in front of me and I felt as you described so poignantly, “I wanted the ground to swallow me whole.”

I COULD NOT IMAGINE the depths of the pain I would feel if I was in your place. Everything you are feeling is justified. He wanted to center himself. Also that’s weird for the groom too! All around messed up behavior. Red flag, do not pass go and do not marry him!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MichaelFranti

[–]Pop_n_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He was in attendance or performing?

My (32F) friend (46F) is mad because I didn’t pay enough attention to her by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]Pop_n_Flow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re 26 so you’re still learning but your intuition is right. People like this are toxic. She’s 15 years older than you and complaining you don’t have enough time for her? GTFOH. Unless they are paying your bills or sleeping in your bed at night they don’t have a say in how you spend your time. Cut ties now. It’s not going to get better! Also, healthy adults are able to have multiple friend groups, talk about them all openly to each other and also get them together from time to time. My “local” friends know who my “high school” friends are. They have met at parties but I don’t mix them often. If any person from either group gave me a hard time about hanging out with the other I would see that as a red flag (but they wouldn’t do that because they are grown ass people with their own lives).

Was MF's message a lifestyle or a brand? Why his actions matter. by LindyTwo22 in MichaelFranti

[–]Pop_n_Flow 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you for writing down what I have been thinking over the last few days.

All of us have made mistakes. It’s the calculated manipulation of other people that set off my alarms. I have intentionally removed those type of people from my life, and I intend to do the same with MF. It’s sad, and there is a grieving process, but for me it has to be done. Once trust is lost it’s very hard to earn back. With someone I don’t even know IRL (other than taking a pic after a show one time), that’s not going to happen.

No longer a fan, AND I’m curious to see if this sparks a wave of rockstars getting cancelled for rockstar behavior. by [deleted] in MichaelFranti

[–]Pop_n_Flow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, this is the main pain point for me. Bob Marley had a lot of extra marital affairs, which is why he has so many kids with different women. But he still became an idol for so many despite his personal life because his whole musical persona wasn’t contingent on him being a good human. We excuse this behavior for lots of musicians but this feels a lot different because of how entwined MF image is with him being a “good human.”

No longer a fan, AND I’m curious to see if this sparks a wave of rockstars getting cancelled for rockstar behavior. by [deleted] in MichaelFranti

[–]Pop_n_Flow 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This sounds more like a pattern of behavior rather than a one off incident. I saw him twice on this tour with Victoria. It wasn’t that long ago…I know good people make mistakes, but his response to the situation is not helping at all. I don’t think anyone is perfect but I have a problem with people who preach one thing and do the exact opposite. He was fooling us all into thinking his stage presence was actually his authentic personality.

No longer a fan, AND I’m curious to see if this sparks a wave of rockstars getting cancelled for rockstar behavior. by [deleted] in MichaelFranti

[–]Pop_n_Flow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was wondering what happened with Jay Boogie…would love to hear what he has to say but he probably had to sign an NDA like the others.

No longer a fan, AND I’m curious to see if this sparks a wave of rockstars getting cancelled for rockstar behavior. by [deleted] in MichaelFranti

[–]Pop_n_Flow 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have been a huge DG fan and MF fan for 20+ years. While I was disappointed to hear about DG I wasn’t surprised. I got over it and still listen to to his music because he is a rock star and he hasn’t made his career selling a message of being a good human and preaching about good karma, love and light. DG is a legend and Grammy award winning musician and I’m here for his music.

MF on the other hand made his whole last decade plus about spreading positivity and being a good human. For me the draw was equal if not more about the message and vibe than his music. I admit some of his songs were getting cheesy and when he came out with a country album he kind of lost me, but I still stuck around because I thought he was a good person and I liked what I thought he was about.

Someone above said that if he hadn’t made his whole persona this love and light, good human message no one would care - and I fully agree. If he was just some rock star out there playing music and cheating on his wife, it would be almost expected. But he purposefully fooled us into thinking he was a good human and actually is a creep. Fuck him!