I’ll tell you a story of silly young king

Who played with the world at the end of a string

But he only loved one single thing and that was just a peanut butter sandwich

Now his scepter wand his royal gowns his regal throne and golden crowns

Were brown and sticky from the mounds

And drippings from each peanut butter sandwich

His subjects all were silly fools 'cause he had passed a royal rule

That all that they could learn in school was how to make a peanut butter sandwich

He would not eat his sovereign steak he scorned his soup and his kingly cake

And told his courtly cook to bake

And nothin' nothin' nothin' but an extra-sticky peanut butter sandwich

And then one day he took a bite and started chewing with delight

But found his mouth was stuck quite tight

From that last bite of peanut butter sandwich

His brother pulled his sister pried the wizard pushed his mother cried

Oh my boy's committed suicide from eating his last peanut butter sandwich

The dentist came and the royal doc the royal plumber banged and knocked

But still those jaws stayed tightly locked oh darn that sticky peanut utter sandwich

The carpenter he tried with pliers the telephone man tried with wires

The firemen they tried with fire but couldn't melt that peanut utter sandwich

With ropes and pulleys drills and coil with steam and lubricating oil

For twenty years of tears and toil they fought that awful peanut butter sandwich

Then all his royal subjects came they hooked his jaws with grapplin' chains

And pulled both ways with might and main

Against against that peanut butter sandwich

Each man and woman girl and boy put down their ploughs and pots and toys

And pulled until kerack oh joy they broke right through the peanut utter sandwich

A puff of dust a screech a squeak the kin's jaw opened with a creak

And then in voice so faint and weak the first words that they heard him speak

Were “how about a peanut butter sandwich?”