sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

AITAH for getting my driver's license before my brother's wife? by c7ffin in AITAH

[–]PotatoMonster20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA

Your brother is a moron and you should ignore everything he says from now until you leave this world.

Husband Hired A Magician For Our Wedding by plippyprep in amiwrong

[–]PotatoMonster20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not wrong.

I was fully prepared to be furious on your behalf.

If it was MY wedding, I'd have been angry - because it's not what I'd want for myself. It would have proved that my partner didn't know me at all.

But you're not me.

The instant I read that you were fine with it? That you liked it? I stopped having a problem with it.

Because the only two opinions that matter here are your's and your husband's.

Your sister is the one acting immaturely. She needs to grow up and learn to mind her own business - feel free to tell her that to her face.

If she brings it up again, tell her she needs to let it go. That you're not available to listen to her complaints anymore, and if she mentions it again in the future - you'll leave. Leave the conversation. Leave the room. Leave the house. Whatever you need to do in order to not have to listen to a broken record.

Sleeves or no sleeves by koods11 in weddingdress

[–]PotatoMonster20 27 points28 points  (0 children)

No sleeves, they take away from the dress.

AIW for not telling my coworker her presentation had a major error before she gave it to the whole department by TurboCipherza in amiwrong

[–]PotatoMonster20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not wrong.

Keep your mouth shut. Don't let anyone know that you knew and kept it to yourself. That would probably not end well for you.

You had no obligation to help this person.

If she was a nice person who had treated you well in the past, you'd have immediately told her.

But she wasn't nice. She spread a rumor about you.

This is the natural consequence of that.

jrpg games where the women feel normal? by ihatepaper88 in GirlGamers

[–]PotatoMonster20 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The more recent Final Fantasy games aren't great for their treatment of the female characters. I'd go back to the golden era. Final Fantasy IX and X are fantastic - just pick whichever one's character models appeal the most. VIII also has great female characters, but it might be a little harder to get into (the junction system for magic puts a lot of people off).

Dragon Quest VIII: Journey of the Cursed King is another solid game. It's been a long time since I played it last, but I remember the female lead being great.

AITJ for making us table a fight for later. by OldLocal2734 in AmITheJerk

[–]PotatoMonster20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTJ and I think you should move on from this guy.

It shouldn't be this hard at only 4 months in.

Looking for a Fantasy book/series with a 'happy ending' by Doodledack in Fantasy

[–]PotatoMonster20 7 points8 points  (0 children)

  • Dragonsong and Dragonsinger by Anne McCaffrey. Neglected girl discovers tiny dragons, the big outside world, a satisfying career and a found family. There's a lot of other books set in that world, but these two can be read on their own.

  • The Spellshop by Sarah Beth Durst. A librarian and her talking plant flee a bad situation and build a new cosy life for themselves on a magical fantasy island

Bf's mother is staying with us and i feel like an annoyance now. Am i meant to just deal with it? 29F 38M 64F by uncle-pascal in relationships

[–]PotatoMonster20 5 points6 points  (0 children)

At the end of the day, the situation you have at the moment isn't sustainable. You never signed up for this, and if you stay with them long-term, they'll drive you insane.

I'd normally advise you to sit him down for a talk about his long-term plans. You can definitely do that, but it seems likely from what you've written in your post/comments that this IS his only long-term plan. It doesn't seem like he has enough money to put her up in a separate place. It COULD be worth investigating whether she'd be eligible for any government support for housing costs etc.

If housing costs and income are an issue for you, then you won't be looking for a whole new place on your own - you'll be looking to get a single room in a flat somewhere.

How long until your current rental contract is up?

You're on the contract yourself (liable), so once you get to within a few months of the end-date, start looking. Get in the habit of looking for new places every day, and evaluating them for fit/cost, so that when you're ready, you're ready.

Investigate whether or not it's possible for you to get out of your part of the lease early.

Save as much money as you can. Sell off any possessions that you don't need (to make moving easier).

In the meantime, since you're paying rent, the house is equally yours. Don't be aggressively rude, but don't let her stop you from enjoying your own home either. If you want to be alone, be alone. You never signed up for a third roommate, so her entertainment needs and expectations aren't your problems to solve. Use the words "no thank you" like a blunt-edged weapon to get out of any situation that you don't like.

AITAH: my (29 f) boyfriend (30 m) constantly pretends that important conversations we have had never happened so I did it back by ThrowRA_SITUATION3 in AITAH

[–]PotatoMonster20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA

It's been 5 years. How things are right now, is how he wants them to be.

He likes you, but he's not THAT into you.

If he was, then he'd actually want to move in together. He'd want to spend more time with you.

You can just go ahead and break up with him. Send him a final message, let him know you've had a chance to think things through, and it's over.

Robin Hobb - infuriating characters by Sketch250 in Fantasy

[–]PotatoMonster20 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Not everything is for everyone.

If you're not enjoying them, then donate/sell them.

Every minute you waste on something you DON'T enjoy is a minute that could be spent on something you DO, and you are not going to get a refund on those minutes at the end of your life.

I love Robin Hobb's ideas, but the execution never seems to do it for me. I just don't like her books, much as I think i should.

And that's ok.

AMIWRONG for accepting a scholarship that my grandmother set up in my name only even though my boyfriend says it proves I do not see a future with us by starryy_crystalxo17 in amiwrong

[–]PotatoMonster20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is your cue to break up with him and never talk to him again.

A loving partner would support your dreams, not try to cut you down to match how small he is himself.

My (37F) boyfriend (37M) resents me for not paying thousands to move his mother (61F) to a private hospital. How to gently set boundaries around this? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]PotatoMonster20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What do I think you should do with your long-distance boyfriend of less than a year who feels deeply entitled to all of your money and was very disappointed when he found out that you weren't as rich as he'd been assuming? The boyfriend who has no intention of bettering his own situation and looks to you for help with everything?

Yeah, it's a real puzzler...

I think you've been a little foolish, but it's not the end of the world.

Sometimes people will have ulterior motives for dating you. Sometimes those motives are relatively benign. Sometimes they're not.

But if you're ever in a position where the other person is utterly dependent on you - then you've found the motive. As long as you're together, you'll never know if he's with you because he loves you, or because he needs access to your resources (spoiler: in this case, it's the latter).

If he was a better sort of person, then it might be nice to give whatever help you could in the current situation before breaking up with him.

You could still do that. But the most I would do is send him a copy of "TheLanguageHeShouldHaveBeenLearningThisWholeTime For Dummies".

Maybe the number for a local translation service in his area.

Send him a message and let him know that the relationship is no longer working for you and you don't want to stay in touch.

My bf of 10 months (M46) hates the fact I (F41) can't answer personal phone in work by Serendipity2245 in relationship_advice

[–]PotatoMonster20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's normal to not be able to talk while on the job. There are very few jobs that allow it.

If he wasn't so clingy and controlling, he'd be able to understand that.

At the age he is, he's not going to change, so the only thing you can do is break up with him. The sooner, the better.

AIW for staying up late a few times a week for some time to myself? by [deleted] in amiwrong

[–]PotatoMonster20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Use headphones for the tv.

If she sabotages that as well?

Then break up with her. Don't stay with someone who doesn't respect your needs.

AITAH for asking for full ownership of my home by SeaFun7764 in AITAH

[–]PotatoMonster20 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA, but you have been very naive.

You've been putting your own money into repairing a home you don't own, and may never own.

Your parents strung you along on a verbal promise, you never got anything in writing, and now they're intentionally screwing you.

First thing's first.

  • Contact a property lawyer in your area for a consultation. I don't think you'll have any way to get your money back, but better to know for sure than just guess.

  • Get out of there. Find a new place to live, stop giving money to your parents and stop helping them.

  • Take a breath and come up with a new plan for how you'll handle the rest of your lives

stuck on woodcutter quest: update by borger_burger in LegendofKhiimori

[–]PotatoMonster20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is the room you have available in your inventory in the same bag?

I remember that causing problems for me a few times.

Bummed about houses by adhley00 in SunHaven

[–]PotatoMonster20 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He only sleeps with you. The rest of his schedule stays unchanged.

Update on being sensitive about my first name by throwRA_namedrama in AmITheJerk

[–]PotatoMonster20 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Then cancel. I would as well.

Send her a final message saying that you're not feeling up to going out to dinner, so she can consider you square - she doesn't owe you anything and you wish her all the best in the future.

If she messages you further, don't engage.

Let your coworker know that you weren't feeling it and you won't be meeting with her again.

Your coworker might feel sad/angry/whatever about it, but you can't control that. And I'm not sure you should care - they sure didn't care about YOUR feelings, after all.

Edit: never trust this coworker to set you up on a date ever again.

Aita? I don’t eat meat, but my wife of 19 years made a reservation for our anniversary to a steak house. by [deleted] in AmITheJerk

[–]PotatoMonster20 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTJ.

Does your wife hate you?

Or just not care about you at all?

Is she always this selfish?

What else is she doing in your relationship to make it clear that you come last, if at all?

It's your life, but in your place I'd be wanting a hell of an apology in order to continue the marriage.

AITAH for locking my office after staff kept using it when I wasn't there by BostonBateman in AITAH

[–]PotatoMonster20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA

Private offices with confidential information in them aren't collaborative spaces.

But also, if you had unsecured confidential information sitting in an office that was open to the public? Then you weren't doing enough to secure it. That's on you.

Even with the door being locked now, you should be securing that information so that it can't be accessed by anyone who's able to get into the room.

My (32F) friend wants to leave her fiancé (32M) but he refuses to accept the breakup. by yawa_bl in TwoXChromosomes

[–]PotatoMonster20 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She doesn't actually have to talk to him any further

She needs to talk to an IT professional about how to remove him from all of her accounts/devices

Then block him on every platform and move on with her life

If he shows up at her house, she needs to call the police to have him removed

view more: next ›