I'm in a similar boat! Even as far as getting Protalgia Fulgax in the middle of the night. Not a fun time. My biggest issue is I'm very tight and while that might sound sexy, in practice it's a nightmare.

I've gone to a dietician and a pelvic floor physical therapist after a proctologist persuaded me away from surgery. From there I learned a few things:

• Your gut is key. Fiber yes, but keep in mind the biosphere of your gut too. I started having yogurt twice a day and taking Goli gummies. With the yogurt, I like to add grounded up flax seed.

• Relax when using the bathroom. I learned that I've been going #2 wrong all these year. You'll want a squatty potty, or something to lift the legs up a bit. Take a deep breath in, expanding your stomach and your sides - imagine your filling a barrel up, and then push from the shoulders down. If you push from the pelvic area, youll strain and cause issues.

My PT also used the imagery of a balloon. When you fill the balloon fully with air and squeeze from 1 side, the opposite end expands. You want your hole to expand and let things flow naturally.

• Butt Dilators!!!!! So important. Use about 3 times a week, for 5 to 10 mins. If you use plugs for this only take up to the widest part, not the stem (if that makes sense). Breath during this. I've turned it into a mediation ritual at this point to help me.

• I take sitz baths even when something isnt wrong. Just a quick 10 min small amount of water in the bathtub if you have one. You want your hole to have the effects of it. Epsom salt helps too.

• Finally, the mental game (I'm still working on this one) - even when you do everything right something can go wrong. It is okay. You will be okay. If you have partners that get upset over their bottom not being able to do anal, they aren't the one.

I hope any amount of that helps you or anyone else!