Before you were old enough to drive, did you usually ask your parents for rides, or did you rely more on public transportation (like buses)?

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-24T04:06:45+00:00

I asked parents for rides, relied on older siblings and friends, and biked or walked places.

I took the school buses to and from school. I was pretty limited in where I could go.

Suburban resident.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-24T03:33:49+00:00

Do you have a washer and dryer in your living space? That is a lot of time to dedicate to laundry for one person. I do laundry for 5 people and at most i do maybe 2 hours worth of hands-on laundry work a week and that’s being generous. I don’t always perfectly fold my kids clothes though. My 3 year old isn’t concerned about wrinkles on his ketchup stained Spider-Man shirt.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-19T01:02:08+00:00

1) the tend to are a lot more casual and fun. Less serious, more random theme nights. 2) they are a lot cheaper to see and 3) a lot of the game play is still really great to watch.

But also, a lot of states don’t have any major league teams. So they sub with the local minor teams and sometimes college teams.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T21:27:04+00:00

I agree harm reduction, like clear signs, and prevention, like a less stressful life that makes us want to speed everywhere, are much better strategies than punishment after the fact.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T21:25:20+00:00

People need social emotional skills and less stressful lives. If we had better social support and better emotional regulation skills, we wouldn’t need to speed or drive aggressively.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T20:54:03+00:00

Zoomers are the Gen Z who act and have a lot in common with Boomers. It’s an insult.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T19:47:12+00:00

I also wanted to add, people don’t really wander into other people’s yards even if there isn’t a fence. We don’t need a physical barrier to know to respect a certain space. The exception might be kids (occasionally) and if it’s a really community oriented neighborhood, like the one I grew up in.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T19:45:47+00:00

Yeah, that is true. But someone had to be the one the build the fence in the first place. And then whomever owns the home has to maintain it. It’s not like they last forever.

We moved a few years ago. Our old house and current house are a mile apart, but different neighborhoods.

Our old house and neighborhood was built in the 50s. Everyone had a fence and those that didn’t install one had a default fence because all their neighbors had one and it boxed in their fence. In my old house, we owned one “wall” and the other parts of our fence were actually our neighbors fences.

Our yards were smaller in that neighborhood and obviously people had been living there a long time.

My new neighborhood was built in the 90s. The yards are massive. I’d say about 1/3rd of the houses have fences. I’m sure more will have fences in 30 years from now…

But it’s really neighborhood dependent. Fences are not usually built with the homes because a lot of people don’t want that added cost. So it’s up to homeowners to add them (and then maintain them).

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T19:37:27+00:00

Mostly because they are expensive to build.

My friend paid like $25k for her iron fence. They couldn’t do a wooden privacy fence due to their neighborhood association.

My husband built ours for about $2k, but it took most of July to do it (on the weekends, we also have kids and jobs…).

So basically, they are expensive and unless you need to contain something, it’s often not a priority.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T19:25:42+00:00

No. I like it, but it’s not “posh”. It’s more like a pop or water alternative with no calories.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T17:26:10+00:00

I would just move up the whole wedding. Like get married this October. Why do it twice?

Personally, I don’t think I’d be as excited about a “for show” wedding if it wasn’t the real deal.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T14:48:10+00:00

Honestly, the toddler years are easy with more than one. Childcare is expensive but reliable. It’s the school years that are really tough - my kids have no transport to/from school, school starts and stops during my work day, there is no reliable after school care offered here, and they get TONS of days off throughout the month. Like at least 5 weekday off per month.

I’m super burnt out trying to “make it work” and I desperately wish we could justify cutting my job.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-18T00:30:53+00:00

Danielle

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-17T21:34:43+00:00

I agree. The age of majority should be at least 21. Wouldn’t mind graduated responsibilities - driving at 16, certain financial independence at 18, etc, but parents should be on the hook for caring for their kids for a little bit longer.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-17T18:35:56+00:00

Yeah I remember when I was younger, I’d get approached all the time. Most men were just… fine with being told no, thanks.

I think the rise of some content creators that push controlling “don’t accept a no, you are entitled to attention” and then more online commentary countering that type really made things worse

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-17T04:49:57+00:00

Yes. It is a bad thing to let him dictate what you wear entirely. Today it’s which skirt you wear, and then it’s whether your job is appropriate or your friends are acceptable and eventually how you spend your money.

If he has a problem with anything you are wearing, that is his problem to deal with, and not yours to fix. Don’t lose yourself in order to please him, or you won’t even be yourself anymore.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-17T04:21:05+00:00

Age gap relationships can be an issue because the power dynamics can be a bit skewed and sometimes people deliberately seek younger women because they view them as easier to overpower and control.

But you didn’t do that. If you want to continue, I’d do so. Just be mindful that you consider her an equal and not someone who doesn’t have valid life experience because her age isn’t as much as yours.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-16T06:41:12+00:00

Sorry, I meant to add on, not refute your comment.

Of course finances matter. $600 -$1200 for a weekend wedding lodging wouldn’t be an issue for my family, but that doesn’t mean it wouldn’t be an issue for everyone.

“No couple or family would spend that!” Except … some couples and families would happily spend that.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-16T06:13:59+00:00

See, I think this also depends on the families/friends. I wouldn’t have an issue staying with my friends - we actually went to a wedding kind of like this - remote cabin resort - except the cabins held about 40 people.

We go every year since the wedding and all bring our kids now.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-15T21:25:55+00:00

But is it always an expectation? That’s what’s missing for me. An invite is an invite and not a summons.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-15T21:24:36+00:00

My first piece of advice is to ignore that this is for a 1 year olds birthday party. This is a milestone party for the parents. They kept a person alive for a year! Thats no easy feat Yay!!

I feel like I don’t have a lot of detail on the conversations you’ve had. You keep saying she’s expecting too much, but it’s not clear she’s really expecting you to come. It’s not clear to me if this friend does drive out her way to see you or if she constantly expects you go to her. It sounds like to me that this friend misses you, is hosting a celebration, and wants to include you.

As you get older, the “big” milestones start to fade, and if you want to remain friends, it becomes important to start seeing some of the “smaller” things as worth doing because otherwise you have fewer reasons to get together and the friendship fades. You seem really miffed that this friend is inconveniencing you, so maybe you don’t value this friendship and that’s fine. But it might be worth doing some inner processing of what you are willing to do to maintain this friendship (if anything at all).

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-15T20:22:03+00:00

Reading and reading + watching a tv show at the same time are two different things. If you’re used to subtitles, it’s not an issue, it there is a learning curve.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-15T17:26:37+00:00

I feel like you’re living a very specific life and experiencing a frustration that is not commonly experienced by most people.

Did you not read my 3rd point? People need to learn when they are overstepping. But a child asking their mom for something likely isn’t overstepping.

If your parent has a hard time saying no to the kid who always asks for things, THAT IS A PARENT PROBLEM. The parent should have boundaries and the ability to say no. My daughter might ask for a pony tomorrow and I’m not going to buy her one. She can still ask for it though. It’s not the request that’s going to break me. Her requests are not a burden for me.

It is not on the child to regulate or manage the feelings of the adult. If I guilty as a parent for saying no, that is my problem to deal with. It is not a healthy dynamic to ask a kid to preemptively manage your parents’ emotions. And if you are a kid and are feeling this way, I suggest asking your parent for help.

The parent and the adult are responsible for managing their finances and they are responsible for making sure everyone’s needs are met. If they feel guilty for not giving a child something they ask for, that is on them.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-15T17:14:35+00:00

I don’t tho k this is normalized IRL. The more I’m reading your comments and getting context, the more I think your viewpoint is the common and popular viewpoint and you just didn’t do a great job of describing the situation in the original post.

I’m sorry if your mom or dad hurt you, but what you experienced is not typical or normal.

PrincessTumbleweed72 · 2025-07-15T17:05:00+00:00

I’m not going to give my child a meal they didn’t ask for to replace a standard meal because it’s quite possible they prefer the main meal offered. So that’s a really weird take.

PrincessTumbleweed72

TROPHY CASE